CHAPTER ONE | London #2
I don’t know why I never visited. Why my parents always had to come to New York to see me because I was too busy to make the trip. To be fair, I was typically very busy, but that’s not the only reason I never came home. I think a part of me was afraid to face what I’d find once I got here.
Even I can admit that I left a trail of destruction in my wake. Most notably, the life of a boy who loved me too much to stop me from dropping an atomic bomb on the relationship we had spent four years building. Then again, it’s not like he fought for me either...
“Are you hungry?” My mom pulls me from my thoughts and for once, I’m more than grateful for the distraction.
“Famished,” I admit. I can’t remember the last time I ate a real meal. Two days. Three maybe. Unless you count what I could afford out of the vending machine at the airport. And let’s not forget about the pretzels I ate on the plane.
“Well, you’re in luck.” She smiles, revealing a row of imperfectly perfect teeth.
My mom has always been a beauty. Unfortunately for me, I look nothing like her.
She’s all tall legs and slender body, where I’m shorter—five foot three, to be exact—and have more of an athletic build, thanks to two decades of dancing and gymnastics.
Where her hair is so blonde it’s nearly white, mine is dark with natural waves like my dad’s.
The only physical characteristic I got from her is my eyes.
A soft blue—the color of a cloudless sky, she always used to say—though I prefer to refer to them as the color of the sea.
“Your father requested beef stew for dinner. It’s been simmering on the stove for hours.”
I stifle the groan of hunger as I drop my bags by the front door.
“Where is Dad, anyway? Shouldn’t he be home by now?” I glance down at the cell phone in my hand, realizing it’s a little earlier than I was thinking as I follow my mom down the hall to the kitchen that sits at the very back of the house.
It’s dated and a little run-down, exactly as I remember it. In this case, I’m glad to see some things haven’t changed.
“He should be here soon.” My mother grabs a bowl from the cabinet and ladles the stew into it.
“He had to do a hull repair on one of the Kades’ fishing boats.
We had a really bad storm move through last week.
Damaged more than a few vessels.” She turns, setting the steaming bowl onto the table before uncovering a basket of freshly baked bread. My mouth practically waters.
“Good to see Henry is still at it.” I take the seat she pulls out for me, stretching my bad leg out to the side. It takes me longer than it should to recognize the way her facial expression has shifted as she takes the seat across from me. “What?”
“Henry passed, London.” The soft wrinkles around her mouth become more pronounced as she frowns.
For a moment, I feel almost removed from my body. Confusion sweeps over me in a deep wave, a fog that I have trouble finding my way out of.
Henry Kade died???
I can’t seem to wrap my head around what my mother just said.
The man was like a second father to me.
How many times did I sit at his dinner table with Penn? How many nights did I spend out in his backyard around a fire? How many mornings out on the docks or helping on one of his boats? And while I haven’t seen him since I left seven years ago, I’ve never stopped considering him family.
“When?” I croak. “How?”
“Heart attack. About nine months ago.”
“Nine months?’ I openly gape at her. “And you’re just now telling me?”
“You were already having such a hard go of things. I didn’t want to add to that. Besides, you hadn’t seen him in years.”
“That doesn’t mean I didn’t want to know. I could have come to his funeral.”
“We both know you wouldn’t have,” she says, a hint of apology in her voice, like she knows the blow hits hard and true, even if I wish it didn’t.
I don’t respond, knowing she’s right. I wouldn’t have come home. I’m not entirely sure anything would have brought me back here when I still felt like I had other options.
“How is everyone? Mary? The boys?”
“They’re getting by. Walker is finishing up his last year at college. Alec took over as captain of one of his father’s fishing boats and he also helps Penn, who took over the company when Henry passed.”
“Wait, what?” I’m sure she can see the surprise that is no doubt written all over my face. “Penn Kade? Running his father’s business? The boy who only cared about his motorcycle and doing everything in his power to disappoint his father? That Penn Kade?”
“The very same.” She nods, eyeing my untouched stew, which prompts me to pick up my spoon and take a tentative bite.
It’s delicious, of course, but the wheels in my head are turning at such a rapid speed, I barely taste anything at all.
“You’ve been gone a long time, London.” She gently reminds me. “A lot has changed.”
“Clearly, if Alec is a fishing boat captain and Penn has taken over his father’s business. He hated everything to do with the fishing industry. In fact, he swore vehemently that he’d never follow in his father’s footsteps.”
“As I said, a lot has changed.”
“I would say so,” I grumble, forcing myself to take another bite, my hunger long since dissipating.
“Eat up.” My mother stands, touching my shoulder as she does. “Your father will be home soon, and there will be plenty of time to catch up on everything you’ve missed since you’ve been gone.” She makes her way back to the stove.
I force down the rest of the stew in silence, resisting the urge to ask my mother a million more questions where Penn Kade is concerned.
I swore to myself that when I left, that was it.
Penn Kade would no longer be in my life.
I wouldn’t talk to him, about him, or even think of him if I could help it.
Not because we had a bad breakup; we didn’t.
In fact, he was even more understanding than I thought he’d be.
And I think that was the problem. He didn’t fight for me.
Didn’t even try to change my mind. The sad thing is, if he had, I might have stayed, which is precisely why I left as abruptly as I did.
Because if he had changed his mind and asked me to stay, I would have.
I would have given up everything for him. ..