CHAPTER NINETEEN
Declan and I spent most of Saturday afternoon in the park on our romantic picnic date, and by the time we made it back to his penthouse, the sun had started to set.
Golden tendrils of sunlight danced across the wide, open living space, and I took my time to fully experience the magnificence of the layout.
The last time I was here, I was so distracted by the need to have Declan inside me that I didn’t pay too much attention to my surroundings.
Now, however, I spun in a slow circle, taking in the opulence.
The walls were painted a dull gray, with high ceilings and a handful of support columns that were sprinkled throughout the room.
Warm lighting cast an ethereal glow on modern furnishings that were all black or some variation of gray.
There were no doors dividing the space, just a wide open-floor concept and floor-to-ceiling glass windows that separated what rooms there were.
There was a large gray sectional off to one side, and in front of it was the biggest screen I’d ever seen in my life outside of a movie theater.
The only speck of color in the room was a playpen sitting next to the couch, which was filled with an assortment of colorful toys that no doubt belonged to his niece and his nephew. Even his artwork was black and gray, with bits of gold and silver splashed in.
“I like your house,” I said offhandedly, as we made our way to the kitchen, which carried the same dark gray theme as the rest of the house.
Declan cocked his head in confusion, and I chuckled.
“I didn’t see much of it the last time I was here,” I explained.
His eyebrows went skywards as realization dawned. “Oh, that’s right. I was too eager to get you on my cock. I forgot to give you a tour.”
“How about a tour now?” I asked. “Specifically, one to your nearest bathroom. I have to pee.”
He laughed and deposited the bags he’d packed our picnic supplies in on the large marble island in the center of the kitchen, and took my hand as he led me down a corridor.
The penthouse was a lot bigger than I envisioned, and there were far more rooms than I had initially thought there would be. There was even a fully stocked floor-to-ceiling library, and across from it was an office that looked fit for an emperor.
We made it to what I assumed was the back of the penthouse, and Declan ushered me into his bedroom, where he promptly deposited my overnight bag on his California king bed and pointed in the direction of his en suite bathroom.
“La salle de bain, mademoiselle,” he said in perfect French.
“You speak French too?” I balked, remembering his virtual meeting where I’d overheard him speaking Japanese.
He shrugged, working his big shoulders out of his leather jacket. “I speak seven different languages, darling. It comes in handy when conducting international business.”
“Huh,” was all that came out of me.
Declan froze, slowly turning to face me. “Huh?” he echoed, feigning offense. “That’s all I get? No ‘wow, that was so awesome’ or ‘oh my gosh, Declan, let me suck you off’. Nothing? Just… huh?”
I grinned at him. “I mean, if you wanted me to suck you off, all you had to do was ask.”
He smirked, then stepped closer, slowly pulling his shirt over his head and tossing it aside. His perfectly sculpted abs were on full display now, and I spaced out for a second, my mouth going dry as I gazed at this specimen of a man.
“How about…” he paused, seeming to contemplate his words. “Je veux que tu t'assoies sur mon visage et que tu le chevauches jusqu'à ce que je ne puisse plus respirer.”
I grimaced. “Okay, so my French is a little rusty, but I think I got this.” I settled into the memory of my high school French class. “There was a ‘sit’, ‘my face’ and… ‘no breathing’?”
He chuckled, wrapping an arm around my waist and pulling me into him. “How badly do you have to pee?”
“Not very. Why?”
He hummed. “I bet I can make you come in thirty seconds or less.”
I arched a brow at that. “Really now?”
“Mm-hmm.” He smirked. “Orgasms are always easier when a woman’s bladder is slightly full. The bladder pushes down on the womb, which makes it easier to stimulate the G-spot.”
I flushed a hot red, as butterflies took up residence in my lower belly; excitement and curiosity warring with the wetness pooling in my center.
I cleared my throat. “As the proud owner of a G-spot, I'm embarrassed to say I didn’t know that.”
Declan threw his head back and howled with laughter, pulling me in for a sensual kiss.
“Seriously, though,” he added, his chuckles winding down. “I really do want you to sit on my face. Preferably now. I haven’t made you come on my tongue in a while. And I really wanna know what you taste like after a long day.”
I grimaced because, for reasons I’d very much like to forget, I was super fussy about hygiene, and we’d been out all day.
It didn’t matter that the weather was cool and there was little to no perspiration.
Or that we’d mostly been sitting around, eating, and getting to know each other better.
It was damn near seven in the evening, and I didn’t know how well my 9 am shower had held up the last few hours.
Declan must have seen the look on my face because he quickly added, “Only if you’re comfortable, of course.”
I took his hand and led him to the bed, urging him to sit, then settling down right next to him.
His strong thigh was pressed close to mine, offering a soothing touch as we sat in intimate silence.
He was waiting for me to start the conversation—to say what I needed to say so he could make it better, and I genuinely loved that about him.
He would always wait for me to be comfortable with anything we do.
Declan was patience personified, and I couldn’t help but think he would have been a wonderful therapist. Or a wildlife photographer.
Either way, I was grateful for his tender approach.
“Before you,” I started slowly, hesitantly. “I’d only ever had sex with one person.”
Declan nodded, seeming to understand where this conversation was going.
“Seth was… okay, I guess. I never really had any other experience to compare it to. But he never liked… going down on me. He said it was too much work and somehow made it seem like it was my fault that I wasn’t enjoying it.
When I tried to convince him that I just needed to warm up to it some more and that he should keep going, he’d say that he didn’t like the taste of me, and that maybe I should…
shower before sex.” I let out a slow breath.
“Then he would bring up the weight I’d gained and blame it on that.
It was just a lot. To the point where I didn’t feel comfortable having sex with him anymore.
I couldn’t stand the constant complaining about my body.
It made me feel ugly and unwanted, and sex just seemed like a chore at that point.
I never really enjoyed sex before you.” I met his eyes then.
“And I just worry that all that negativity will start trickling back in, and I won’t feel comfortable being intimate with you anymore.
Not that it would be your fault.” I rushed to add.
“I just need to unlearn some of those coping tactics I once used to get through intercourse. It’s just that when you said you wanted to…
go down on me, the first thing that popped into my mind was that I needed to shower.
Then you added that you wanted to know what I taste like as is, and all those complaints about my body started rushing back. ”
Declan opened his mouth to speak, but I cut him off.
“I know you’re not my shitty husband. And maybe I’m dumb for saying this because we haven’t known each other for very long, but I know you would never do or say anything that would make me feel uncomfortable or unsafe during sex.”
“Good,” he breathed, his shoulders relaxing a fraction.
I smiled. “And yes, while I would very much love to oblige your sitting of the face request, I just think I’d be more comfortable taking a shower first. For now, at least. We can work our way up to it, if that’s all right with you.”
He took both my hands in his and brought them to his lips for a quick kiss.
“Of course, that’s all right. I’ll only ever want you to be happy and comfortable with me.
And if that means taking a shower before oral sex, then fuck it, I’ll take one with you.
Hell, I’ll take five if that’s what it takes. ”
I threw my head back and laughed at the sincerity in his words.
“I mean it, Mel,” Declan said softly. “You sharing your body with me is a gift I’ll never take for granted.
And I’ll tell you every second of every day how beautiful and sexy I think you are.
I don’t care about your weight. I’ve only ever known you at this size, and to me, you’re perfect.
I love that your tummy jiggles a little when you walk.
I love that your thighs stick together when you stand, because it makes spreading them so much more fun.
” He smirked. “And have I mentioned that ass of yours? I could bounce my Lamborghini off of it.”
I chuckled some more, and he took my face in his hands, fingers gently stroking my cheeks.
“Trust me when I say experiencing your body is not a hardship,” he declared. “And I’d love to keep experiencing it for a very long time… Forever, if you’d let me.”
With tears threatening to spill from my eyes, I took Declan’s face in my hand and kissed him like my life depended on it—because it just might—only pausing long enough to suck in air.
“I’m leaving him,” I whispered the words out loud for the very first time, these words that I’d kept close to my chest for so long, but were very much true.
“I’ve been thinking about it for a while now.
Long before I met you, actually. I just need to get my life in order before I can do so.
I won’t take anything in the divorce. I don’t want his car or his money or his property.
I just want out. But until then, the least he owes me is health insurance and a roof over my head until I can stand on my own. ”
Declan sighed and brushed a kiss across the back of my hand, his thumb stroking back and forth over the spot, soothing the touch of his warm lips against my skin.
“I won’t pretend I know what you’ve been through,” he started.
“But I see how hard you work and how passionate you are about your dreams. And I admire your drive to stand on your own two feet. But know that I am here for you in any way you need. It would be my honor to put your mind at ease in whatever capacity you desire. I won’t overstep, and I won’t force you to do anything you’re not ready to do.
But the second you feel like your cup is about to overflow, you call me. Okay?”
I nodded, his words settling deep inside my chest. Then I grabbed him by the hands and hauled him upright as I stood.
“We should take that shower now,” I decided, feeling like a weight had been lifted off my shoulder.
Declan grinned and leaned down to brush a tender kiss across my forehead. “Lead the way, darling.”