Chapter 6
SIX
Lane
Esme is sitting cross-legged on the living room rug with the twins in front of her, surrounded by the aftermath of what looks like a very enthusiastic play session.
Soft blocks are scattered across the carpet, one of the babies has a wooden ring in his mouth, and the other is trying to stack three blocks on top of one another even though she clearly has no idea what she's doing.
Esme is laughing.
It's that particular laugh of hers that always gets me. Warm and unrestrained. The kind that makes her whole face brighten and draws little creases at the corners of her eyes.
Her blonde hair is gathered into a loose knot, with several soft strands falling around her face. She's wearing a simple cream-colored sweater and fitted jeans, nothing remarkable, and somehow she looks more beautiful to me than women I've seen dressed for formal events.
She doesn't seem to notice that she's beautiful.
That's part of the problem.
She's too busy showing the babies how to fit two blocks together.
"Like this," she tells the little girl patiently. "See? You put this one here."
The baby knocks the tower over.
Esme gasps dramatically.
"Oh, no. You've destroyed everything."
The baby squeals.
Esme laughs again.
Something happens inside me.
It's physical first.
A warmth settles low in my body, the same reaction I've had to her countless times over the last few weeks. But this isn't the kind of desire I'm used to feeling when I look at her.
It's softer.
Deeper.
It isn't simply that I want her.
I want this.
Her sitting on that rug.
Her laughter filling the house.
Her opening the curtains in the morning.
Her stealing the good blanket from the sofa because she claims it is warmer.
Her in our kitchen.
Her at our dinner table.
Her asleep upstairs, knowing that when morning comes she's still going to be here.
The realization hits me so hard that I actually straighten.
I'm in love with her.
I stare at Esme as she reaches for the little boy, kisses his cheek when he crawls into her lap, and whispers something that makes him giggle.
I'm in love with her.
Jesus.
I've known for a while that what I feel isn't casual. I've known I care about her, that I want her around, that I get irrationally irritated when she looks exhausted and refuses to let either of us help.
But this is different.
This is permanent.
This is wanting her future to be tangled up with mine.
I finally pull myself away from the doorway and head toward the kitchen.
Rhett is standing at the counter making coffee.
He looks over when I enter. "You're quiet."
I lean against the island. "I was watching Esme."
His expression immediately becomes amused. "That explains the look on your face."
I run a hand through my hair. "I think I'm in love with her."
Rhett stops pouring coffee. For a moment, he says nothing.
Then he sets the pot down and smiles. "I know."
I stare at him. "You know?"
"Lane, I've known for weeks."
I let out a breath that is half laugh, half disbelief. "You're annoyingly perceptive."
"I have my moments." He hands me a cup. "I want a future with her too."
Rhett's expression becomes more serious.
He leans back against the counter. "I've been thinking about it a lot lately.
I don't want her to eventually leave because she thinks this was temporary.
I don't want to wake up six months from now and realize we've let her believe she's only passing through. "
I nod slowly. "Neither do I. I want her to stay."
"Forever?
I smile. "Forever."
The word settles between us. It feels right. Terrifying, maybe, because forever is a big promise.
But right.
I glance toward the doorway. Esme is still playing with the babies.
"We need to step it up."
Rhett laughs. "That's exactly what I was thinking."
"We need to make sure she knows we're serious about her."
"Then what are we waiting for?"
I look at him. "We take her out tonight. A real date."
Rhett's smile widens. "With the kids?"
"Of course."
He nods. "I like it."
I take another sip of coffee and look toward the living room again. "We need her to understand that she's not just our babysitter. She's not just someone we sleep with."
Rhett's expression softens. "She's family."
"Exactly."
Before I can move, Rhett walks to Esme. He comes up behind her. I watch as he slides both arms around her waist. Esme laughs softly and leans back into him without hesitation.
"You're sneaking up on me." She giggles.
"I wanted your attention." Rhett nuzzles against her neck.
"You have it." She smiles, and it’s a warm smile, the kind a woman would give to someone she likes and feels safe around. Knowing we have become that for her fills me with immense pride.
Rhett presses a gentle kiss against the side of her neck. I see her shoulders relax. That’s even better. Physical touches are making her let her guard down. That’s a difference from weeks ago, when she was nervous.
"How do you feel about going out for dinner tonight?" Rhett asks her, but he’s looking at me, knowing this is something we came up with together.
Esme turns her head. "Dinner?"
"An actual date," he corrects. “We want to wine and dine our sexy babysitter.”
Her expression changes immediately. "With the babies?"
"Of course."
She looks from him to me. "You don't have to do that."
I step closer.
"We know. We want to." I reach out and take her hand. "You're not just our babysitter, Esme."
Her eyes soften.
"You're not just a sexual partner to us, either," I continue. "We want time with you outside the bedroom. We want to take you somewhere nice. We want to talk to you across a table and watch you smile and make you feel good for reasons that have nothing to do with sex."
Her cheeks turn pink.
Rhett smiles against her hair. "We can take the kids. It'll be fun."
Esme looks down at our hands.
Then back at us. "Really?"
"Really."
She bites the inside of her cheek, and I can see the excitement she's trying not to show. "Okay."
The smile that spreads across her face makes me grin.
"Good." I lean down and kiss her cheek. "You're cute."
Her blush deepens.
"And I can't wait to see you in your cute outfit later."
She laughs softly. "You two are impossible."
"Get used to it."
A few hours later, I'm very glad I said it.
Because when Esme walks into the restaurant, she takes my breath away.
We're seated at a corner table beside tall windows overlooking the city, with the evening lights beginning to come alive outside. The restaurant is elegant without being stuffy, all warm gold lighting, dark wood, white linen, and quiet music.
The twins are settled in their double stroller beside us.
Rhett is on one side of Esme. I'm on the other. And Esme looks beautiful.
She's wearing a deep green dress that falls softly around her curves and reaches just below her knees.
The fabric moves when she walks, emphasizing her feminine shape without looking like she's trying too hard.
Her blonde hair is loose tonight, falling in soft waves around her shoulders, and she's wearing delicate earrings that catch the candlelight whenever she turns her head.
Her makeup is subtle. Her smile isn't.
I can't stop looking at her.
She catches me staring. "What?"
I shake my head. "Nothing."
She narrows her eyes. "That's not true."
"You look beautiful."
Her entire expression changes.
"Really?"
"Really."
Rhett reaches across the table and takes her hand. "Stunning."
She looks down, suddenly shy.
It does something to me. This woman has no idea how much we want her.
I pick up the menu. "What do you want to eat?"
She glances over it for a few seconds.
Then, unexpectedly, she closes it. "You choose."
"For you?"
She nods. "I like when you two decide."
I exchange a glance with Rhett. He understands exactly what she means. She trusts us enough to hand us that little piece of control.
"All right," I say.
We order for her. A carefully prepared entrée, a salad, and several starters to share. I choose a plate of truffle arancini—crisp golden risotto balls filled with cheese and truffle—and a few other dishes Rhett thinks she'll like.
When the server leaves, Esme looks at the two of us. "I still can't believe this."
"What?"
She looks around the restaurant. "I'm here. With both of you. On a date." Her voice becomes softer. "With the babies."
She looks toward the stroller and smiles. "And nobody is staring."
I reach across the table. "We told you. There's nothing strange about this."
She nods, but her eyes suddenly fill with tears.
I immediately sit straighter. "Esme?"
"I'm sorry." She wipes at her cheek.
Rhett takes her hand. "Don't apologize."
She laughs through the tears.
"It's just... I never thought this would happen. I didn't think I'd find even one man like you." Her gaze moves from me to Rhett. "Let alone two."
My chest tightens.
"I didn't think someone like you would be interested in someone like me."
I look at her for a long moment. Then I reach across and touch her cheek. "Esme, look at me."
Her teary eyes face me.
"I love the way you take care of people, babygirl. You're so naturally giving."
Her lips part slightly.
"I love how patient you are with the babies. I love how you notice when they're uncomfortable before either of us does. I love the way you instinctively reach for them when they cry."
Her eyes shine.
"I love how gentle you are."
Rhett squeezes her fingers.
"I love your softness," he says. "The way you make this house feel warmer. The way you make people feel comfortable around you. The way you can walk into a room and somehow make it feel like home."
I smile.
"And I love how feminine you are without ever trying to be. You don't have to perform for us. You're just you."
She starts crying again.
I brush a tear away.
"You're beautiful, Esme. But that's not even the part that matters most."
Rhett nods. "We're attracted to you because of everything you are."
She presses her lips together, trying to hold back another smile. "I feel spoiled by all this praise."
"You deserve to be spoiled," Rhett says. "And you deserve to be praised and worshipped like the goddess you are."