Chapter 16
Sariah
“I know he’s your favorite cousin slash best friend but I’m not comfortable going to a party for his mom.
What if he gets mad and kills everyone?” I voiced my concern to Raul who in return thought it was hilarious.
We were at my house eating dinner that he purchased from a Caribbean place.
He knew how much I craved that kind of food.
“I’m being serious and you’re making fun of me.” The baby had me very emotional and I hated that.
“Cairo don’t give a fuck about you enough to wanna kill you.” I became offended. I didn’t want him to commit any harm on me but Raul didn’t have to say it like that.
“Excuse me.”
“I’m just saying, y’all only speak when around one another and that’s barely.
He knew about your pregnancy before I did; meaning he’d never kill a pregnant woman.
Then again, he really don’t give a fuck.
” Raul continued stuffing his face while he watched some game on the big screen in my living room.
My house wasn’t huge yet it was very comfortable and intimate.
It was enough for me and my grandmother but with a baby coming, I had to start working more hours to save for a bigger place.
Of course it would be in the future because babies always slept with their mommies; I know mine will.
At least, I’ll have a few years to find somewhere decent and not be living paycheck to paycheck.
Raul definitely had money but I’ve never depended on a man and I’m not about to start.
If he wanted to donate to the Sariah and baby fund that’s cool but I’ll never fix my mouth to ask him for a dime.
There’s nothing wrong with asking for help; it’s just my pride and ego was too big for me to fix my lips to do it.
“Anyway, it’s just a party and if you don’t wanna go, then don’t but I’m sure your loser ass friend would want you there too.” I dropped the fork out my hand.
“Say what? Kateri didn’t mention anything to me about going.” He smirked.
“That’s probably because she wasn’t asked, Cairo told her to be there.” What was I missing? Kateri text me yesterday from work saying we had to talk but I hadn’t heard from her today. Did that chick really get invited to the devil’s mom party and not tell me?
“That’s rude. How he demanding her to do anything when—” He cut me off.
“It’s none of your business.” Picking up his soda, I stared at him intently.
“Did they have sex or kiss? Why would someone like Cairo make that demand?” Raul placed the soda down and looked at me.
“Again, their business is their business.” Still staring because Raul told me in so many words that something did take place.
“You know don’t you?” Now I was aggravated because why didn’t Kateri tell me. Was she ashamed or did Cairo swear her to secrecy?
“Listen, we need to discuss you getting a bigger place.” He turned his face up at my apartment.
“What? I’m fine here and I’m not leaving my grandmother.” I started to get upset thinking about being away from her.
“Girl shut up. He didn’t say a thing about leaving me.” My grandmother popped up out of nowhere. I thought she was asleep in her room because I’ve been home for a couple of hours and hadn’t seen her.
“You don’t know how to relax and keep your mouth closed. If the man bringing up you getting a bigger place then let him.” I turned to where she stood next to Raul.
“Ain’t no man about to buy me nothing and then throw it in my face. I don’t need a damn thing from him anyway.” The look on his face told me, I said too much and should’ve listened to my grandmother. As she shook her head in disgust, Raul got up, cleaned his spot and walked over to me.
“Let me very clear on a few things before I bounce.” He lifted my head to make sure my attention was on him.
“Excuse my language ahead of time Grams.” She nodded as I pulled my head away from his grip.
“I have never made a weak bitch my woman and had no plans on doing so in the future.” Did he just call me a bitch?
“Hmph.” Grams mumbled taking a seat where he just got up from.
“You being a strong woman and holding it down for you and Grans was one of the reasons I chose to fuck you with no condom. You were the one I wanted to grow old with and to have my kids.”
“Oooh, I know that’s right.” Grams was being messy.
“The strength of you having to work hard just to stay together and the struggle y’all are going through now was the reason, I wanted to upgrade you. My woman shouldn’t have to struggle when I have more than enough to share.” I felt like shit as he spoke.
“But ain’t no way in hell I’m gonna marry a bitch who can’t get outta her own way to see the blessings right in front of her.” Raul headed towards the door.
“Now usually I’d have a lot to say about you calling my granddaughter a bitch, however you get a pass because I had to tell her that’s what she was being lately too.” I couldn’t believe my own grandmother was agreeing to him disrespecting me.
“When you grow up and learn how to be a woman and about your shit, call me. If I’m not involved with a real woman who can accept the good life without thinking it’s a handout, I may come back.” Was he really breaking up with me?
“Until then, don’t hit my line unless it’s a doctor’s appointment or you’re in labor. And no, I won’t be attending no gender reveals or baby showers so don’t send no invites.”
SLAM! The door shook the windows due to how hard he closed it. Not saying a word, I felt my grandmother staring in my direction. Instead of responding, I cleaned my spot and went to my room.
“Raul was a good man.”
“Grams how could you let him call me a bitch?” She chuckled.
“The same way you called him a nigga off the street who can’t do nothing for you.” Now that she said it, it did sound a little harsh but in my opinion, bitch was worse but I understood where she was coming from.
“Sariah, all that man mentioned was you getting a bigger place and you flipped for no reason. You gave him no time to explain what he meant or if he had friends that could help and get you a good rate for a mortgage based off your income.” As she went on and on standing at the door, I felt bad.
Maybe I should’ve waited or even asked what he meant.
Whatever the case, he said we were over and I’m not about to chase no man.
If he didn’t want to be involved with me any longer than it was what it was.
I won’t be asking him for a dime and it’s up to him how involved he’ll be with the baby.
“You’re never gonna learn which means you’ll be lonely forever.” I sucked my teeth.
“You are not going to get on me and my great grandbaby nerves either so you better work on that attitude and get your man back or get a man.” She closed the door.
Falling back on the bed, I lifted my head over my shoulders and blew my breath. I got a few more months before the baby comes so I should get used to being alone now.
“Why you ain’t tell me about Cairo inviting you to his mom’s party? Or as Raul put it, demanding you to be there?” Me and Kateri started laughing.
“I was shocked myself and had you answered when I called, you would’ve known.
” I couldn’t deny not answering because she did call after the issue with me and Raul.
Unbeknownst to her, I had a melt down over us breaking up and no one could get me through it but myself so I took a few days to respond.
She tried to come over but I came up with an excuse and she seemed ok with it.
Now here we were at her job having lunch.
I was off and brought her something to eat as a peace offering for not seeing or speaking to her.
“I’m not sure what to wear or the color scheme. What are you wearing because I know Raul invited you?” My eyes became misty right away.
“I won’t be there.” She stared for a few seconds.
“What you do or better yet, what did you say?” I hated that she knew me so well. Shaking her head as I explained, that crazy bitch walked by and stopped soon as she saw me.
“You’re never gonna have a man. My poor nephew will be homeless with you and rich with his or her father.” She joked, eating her sandwich.
“Here we go.” I sipped my soda as she headed toward us. Kateri wrapped the scrunchy around her hair and stretched her arms out to crack her knuckles.
“What you doing all that for?” The chick stood over top of us which made Kateri stand. She told me in a stern voice to stay put.
“What the fuck you want?” Kateri snapped making me laugh.
“I just came by to thank this trifling bitch for messing up with Raul. Guess who’s gonna be his date to Cairo’s mom’s sixty fifth birthday celebration?” Why was she bragging and did Raul really invite her?
“Bitch?” I stood up right away. Kateri had her fist balled up to fight. I wouldn’t dare allow her to get fired over me.
“If you’re going to the party then have fun. And in the meantime, stay away from me.” I stood toe to toe with her.
“The next time you approach me with some bullshit, I promise I’ll beat your ass even though I’m pregnant.” If I could’ve taken a photo of her expression after saying that, I would’ve. It appeared that her feelings were hurt and she was about to cry.
“That’s right. I’m having his child and you’re not so enjoy the party.” I waved her off and sat back down.
“Goodbye Sammy.” A man’s voice spoke behind me. Seeing the same guy that’s been following me for weeks now, I felt at ease. I’m not sure why it took him a few minutes to intervene but it’s fine. At least there wouldn’t be any fighting today.
“You ok?” Kateri asked, cleaning up her tray.
“I’m fine and I got the baby.” I shrugged trying to sound confident.
“That’s right you do and he’ll be back.” She went to throw out the trash.
“You think so.” I wanted to believe he’ll come back around.
“Absolutely as long as you control your mouth and stop being, “Miss Independent.” She used fake quotes.
“It’s just…” She stopped me from speaking.
“He’s not trying to take away your freedom Sariah, and as his child’s mother of course he’ll want to have you living better and what’s wrong with that.
You’re always talking about living paycheck to paycheck but when someone comes along to help ease that problem, you go off.
” Kateri was right. I had no business treating Raul that way when all he was trying to do was make sure me and his kid had a better life.
Maybe I’ll apologize after his aunt’s party because at this point, I didn’t want to attend anyway.