SEVEN #5
Annoyance prickled over my skin - a lifetime of being told everyone else knew better for me than I knew for myself. "I will take that under advisement. If you'll excuse us, we have somewhere to be."
Inwardly, I cringed a bit at the realization that, at times, when I was being snarky or superior, I had a tendency to channel my mother. It wasn't an ability I could claim I was happy to possess. But at least it made my nosy super turn and leave, mumbling under his breath as he went.
"He always look at you like that?"
"Like I have no clothes on?" I asked, wrinkling up my nose. "Yes."
"Asshole," he concluded, turning to take a bag from Smoky, but not taking his arm from off my shoulders. "You have everything?"
I took one last look at my apartment, letting myself feel the loss, exhaling out my disappointment. "Yeah."
"You can have it again," Drake told me as his friends moved ahead of us, sure-footed, confident, leading us back toward the veil, heads swiveling now and again, vigilant, keeping an eye for Cass and his minions.
"Have what?" I asked, sticking close to his body even as the humid air started to make my shirt stick to my skin.
"Something of your own," he explained. "Something full of yellow and green and pretty things. You'll have that again. I will make it happen."
My heart swelled a bit in my chest even as I tried to remind myself not to get my hopes too high, not to let myself dream of something that may not be a possibility.
I understood how many things were in The Green, how most lived.
Not in big estates like I had grown up in.
In little huts they had built with their own two hands.
But, somehow, I liked the idea.
"Could I help?" I asked.
"Help with what?"
"Making a home for myself. Can I help build it? I know nothing about it, but I would like to be a part of it."
"I'd like to see that," he told me, eyes dancing at the very idea.
"It wouldn't be so different, furnishings aside," he added.
"Your home in the human realm is about the size of the average home in my land.
Someone can show you how to make dye from flowers and berries to decorate with.
How to make your own pots and cups and such.
It's not exactly like the life you were living in the city, but it can be fulfilling in a different way. "
"I think I would like that."
I liked finding little treasures for my space, never having been allowed to choose my own decor growing up. I imagined it would be even more fun to make them myself, to be a part in it in a bigger way.
"Would I see you?" I asked, gaze watching my feet on the sidewalk.
"Hm?"
"When we go into your land. Will I be seeing you?"
"Of course you'll be seeing me. I'll be right there whenever you need me. I know it will be scary at first.Can I level with you?"
"Sure." My head swiveled and lifted to inspect his profile, curious.
"I think it might be a little... uncomfortable," he decided, not quite wanting to use the word scary to describe his worries about going home after so long, "for me at first. It would be nice to have a friendly face around."
"You'll have your family back," I reminded him. "I mean... if you had..."
"I had family," he cut me off. "And they'll be happy to see me. But," he sucked in a breath, exhaling it hard.
"But what?"
"But they will be expecting a man who no longer exists," Smoky supplied from several feet in front of us, making me uncomfortably aware of the idea that she had been eavesdropping on us.
"Yeah," Drake agreed, nodding. "Can't say I am going back there the same man I was when I left. It is going to take them a while to adjust, I think. They'll try to understand, but I think only you can really get it. Being there, seeing things... knowing who I am now."
"Well, you'll always be welcome at my place. You know, after we build it."
We.
That felt right.
It was a silly thought.
And one I clearly was on my own with.
Because Drake's arm lifted suddenly, making me all-too-aware of the weight that had been there, leaving me feeling too light, something I didn't know was possible.
We walked in silence except for me to suggest the train over the ferry, saving us a little time.
Everyone stiffened at the idea of being around all that steel, but with time being of utmost importance, everyone agreed, following me through the inner workings of Pennsylvania Station, putting me in the unlikely position of being the guide, the one with the know-how, the street smarts.
I found I liked it, even if it would be fleeting.
"Nope," Smoky said, slamming the flat of her palm into Drake's chest when he went to take the empty seat beside me.
"The girls want to talk," she told him, catching me off-guard.
Smoky didn't exactly seem like the chatty sort.
"Don't go puffing your chest at me. I promise to keep her safe, you overprotective brute," she told him.
"And if I fail, you are all of three feet away," she told him, waving to empty seats two rows back and across from us.
Once the guys moved away - albeit somewhat reluctantly - Smoky dropped down, putting all her bags to the seat near the window.
Undeniably intimidated, I lowered myself down near the window across from her, putting my bag near the aisle.
"So, you're the one worth crossing over into this hellhole of a realm," she started, head tilted.
"Hellhole is a bit of a stretch," I defended my very temporary home.
"It smells of piss and sweat and festering garbage," she challenged.
And, well, there wasn't much I could say to counter that. Especially in the summer anyway.
"What makes you so special?" she asked, no malice in her voice, pure curiosity. Clearly being someone used to being on her own, she didn't quite know how to approach things without being the slightest bit too blunt, borderline offensive.
"Nothing," I said, shrugging. "I am just... easily usable, I guess," I admitted, feeling the words sting a bit, not exactly proud of that reality.
"So, that's it," she said, shaking her head. "The sweet, innocent bit," she concluded. "That's a thing, I hear. Gets the menfolk all hot and bothered, makes them feel needed and shit."
I couldn't disagree with her. I could see it that way. I was innocent in many ways. And perhaps too sweet at times. And from what I could tell from all the human shows and books I had seen and read, men absolutely enjoyed their damsels in distress.
But I didn't want to be seen as someone who always needed saving.
I had saved myself, damnit.
And I had saved Drake too.
"He thinks he owes me," I told her, looking out the window as the train lurched to life. "That's why he came for me. Because I let him go. Gave him the chance to be able to live out his life by his own terms. He wants the same for me."
"Except you can't have that. Not the way you want to have it." I didn't argue with her. She wasn't wrong. "In the human realm, are women always the pawns to the will of men?" she asked, voice cautious.