Chapter 55 #2
“I found the cat,” Dirk shouted from the stairs below, hoisting Duchess up like a sacrifice to an angry god.
The fluffy white Persian was unamused, tail flicking.
He wouldn’t let them pass until Bradley had traded the plate and mug for the cat.
“Go on, get you a sniff. You’ll feel loads better, I promise. ”
“Um, okay.” The dragon was so convinced with the benefits of sniffing a cat that Bradley tentatively raised Duchess to his face.
“Thank you, Master Dirk.” Millie slipped around him and began her descent. “Now come along, we need your nose.”
“For optimizing the spice blend in those lovely teacakes?” He quickly demolished what was left on the plate, the coffee, too. “You did a simply marvelous job, but I personally think we could go a little heavier on the clove.”
“No. We’re hunting magical objects.”
Dirk balked, first because his ability to sniff out magical objects wasn’t as keen as it once had been, and second because if Bradley was finally leaving the workroom . . . “We? What we?” He zoomed close to whisper in her ear, “Shouldn’t you stay behind and snoop in the library?”
This was the perfect opportunity to do so, but Dirk hadn’t seen the bewilderment in Bradley’s face when Millie had told him she’d help him.
She’d never had a friend before, but this seemed the logical first step—Assistance in the Pursuit of Another’s Goal without Any Personal Gain, for Beginner Friends.
Except she doubted a friend would envision him kissing her with the same fervor with which he’d just devoured those chai-spiced teacakes.
“You’re red again,” the dragon pressed. “Are you overheating? Do you need a snack?”
Snack conjured a whole host of scandalous imagery, all of which included the muscular apprentice minus his robe and the rest of those teacakes, that Millie forced from her mind. She fanned herself with a hand. She could control this.
“No,” she whispered hotly. “And stop talking about snacks. I’ll snoop through the library later. Might not even need to.”
“What?” Dirk pressed.
She snuck a glance over her shoulder to check if Bradley had noticed her inflamed cheeks. “Stop sniffing the cat, Mr. Don— Bradley. This is your treasure hunt, so you should take the lead.”
At least if he was in front of her, she wouldn’t fantasize about him capturing her from behind and pulling her down onto his lap for a proper snogging.
Crone’s Crooked Tits, what was wrong with her?
He’d given her permission to use his birth name and now she was consumed with thoughts of snogging?
She was never going to make pastry or coffee just the way he liked it ever again, not if it led to more of this.
Piss and plagues, she was going to be a pirate! What pirate baked and snogged?
The One in Ten can do whatever she likes, a traitorous thought told her.
Shut up.
“Treasure hunt?” Dirk asked. “And since when were you two on a first name basis?”
Bradley set the cat down, and Duchess padded down the stairs with her fluffy tail held high.
“When Master Excelsior brought us here,” he said, ignoring the dragon’s second question entirely, “he told me ‘the true power lies within.’ I thought it meant, well, something else, but what if it’s literal? The Tianzi Toad, the slipper, the necklace—it’s all proof of that.”
“Proof of what?” the dragon wailed. “I was fetching the cat!”
Millie was eager to latch on to this different subject. “If Bradley feeds the Tianzi Toad enough magical objects, then it will awaken from its slumber and grant him a wish. Any wish. He’s going to ask the toad to break his curse.”
“JUBILATIONS!” The Mini Red slammed into Bradley’s chest for a hug.
“Dirk?” the apprentice asked. “Are you . . . crying?”
“Yes,” the dragon sobbed. “Just let it happen.”
Only Millie knew those were tears of relief mixed with the joy Dirk felt for his friend, and she approached quietly to place a knowing hand on the nape of Dirk’s neck, where the illusion hid his mane of feathers and the gaps of hide where scales should be.
He glanced back at her with a shaky grin and then smooshed his face back into Bradley’s chest. The apprentice’s robe had turned a dark brown with the dragon’s tears.
“I really need your help on this one,” Bradley murmured.
“When I’m not beating up Heroes, I’m gonna find all the magical artifacts, just you watch.” Dirk peeled himself way and swirled above their heads to limber up.
“I don’t want to be the piss in your porridge,” Millie began, “but this all seems onerous, doesn’t it? Why would your master, who went through such great lengths to postpone your exam and set you up here, be so deliberately obscure? Shouldn’t breaking your curse be easier than this?”
Bradley barked a laugh. “You don’t know Master Excelsior. ‘You need to broaden your mind, dear boy,’” he imitated, dropping his voice an octave.
“‘It needs to be as limber as a wet noodle,’” Dirk joined him, and they both chuckled.
“He always gave you the most ridiculous tests,” the luck dragon agreed.
“Nothing was what it seemed with him, not ever. He would totally have you go on a twisted treasure hunt as a method for breaking your curse without giving you any prior instructions, nor any idea what you were actually looking for.”
“I mean no disrespect,” Millie said as she stepped around a glowing hermit crab, “but what a dickhead.”
Bradley threw his head back with a laugh. It was deep and rich and free. Warmth bloomed across Millie’s chest as she watched an invisible weight lift from his shoulders.
“I can’t wait for you to tell him that to his face.”
She balked. “Me?”
The apprentice scooped her hands into his, his grin wide and his eyes sparkling. “If it hadn’t been for you, Tula, I never would’ve dived so deeply into Small Magicks. It was my escape from your . . . antics.”
“You’re welcome?” She tried to pull away, suddenly shy at his nearness and the way fire flooded from his hands through hers and down into someplace deep and stirring.
“I never would’ve read about the Tianzi Toad, not in time, anyway. And when he asks me how I broke the curse, I’ll tell him it was all because of you.”
“You don’t have to do that. He’ll know I was in the tower—”
“And that I brought her here,” Dirk added, smacking his friend across the back with his tail. “You’re just going to out me like that?”
“At that point, what’s he gonna do? You’re Dirk the Dangerous! What man commands a dragon? Even a luck dragon who hasn’t grown out his barbels?”
“Well, when you say it like that.” The Mini Red preened a mane of feathers only he could see.
“Come on.”
Bradley kept hold of the princess’s bandaged hand—his friend’s hand—as he descended the stairs to the first ransackable room. He couldn’t remember a time when he’d felt this light. Every stone step was a cloud, every breath of hot desert air fueling him with energy instead of sapping his strength.
“But if all three of us are hunting, who will make more of those teacakes?” Dirk complained. “We’re going to need snacks, and Millie’s gone and ruined simple nuts and oranges as our Anti-Fainting Noshables. No afternoon can be complete without teacakes now, and it’s all your fault.”
“It’s your fault for eating an entire plate yourself.” She booped him on the snout. “Find us a magical object, and I’ll make an entire batch all for you.”
“Jubilations,” the baby dragon cried again and immediately barged into the first of the many rooms.