Chapter 15
RECKLESS
Brandon was quite certain that Marigold would be asleep by now, but she was definitely not as he watched her barrel down the stairs to him. He didn’t want her to see him like this, but it was too late now.
He was being half carried, half dragged up the stairs into his room by Owen.
His body was still uncooperative. The pain on his face was a throbbing agony that he fought to hide from Marigold by gritting his teeth.
He didn’t have to touch or look at himself in the mirror to know that his nose was definitely broken.
“On the bed!” Marigold ordered.
Brandon lifted his head, and he was ready to tell her to go back to her room, not to worry, but as if she were reading his mind, she met his stare and glared. Perhaps Owen was not wrong after all. It would be best if he didn’t anger Marigold at this moment.
She was standing there, her jaw set and her eyes blazing, visibly trying to hold back from screaming and scolding him. He was saved by the servants who came in bringing what Marigold had ordered.
“Put them there. You can go. I will take care of it,” Marigold said decisively.
She took the basin with clean water and a cloth, brought it closer to the bed, and sat down by his side.
“Is it too much to ask what happened?” Marigold avoided his eyes as she cleaned the wounds on his hands first.
“We were at the docks. We were outnumbered,” Owen said, exhausted.
“And why were you at the docks?” Marigold demanded.
Brandon turned to look at her and then noticed that she was in her nightclothes. And Owen was in the room.
“I will speak with my wife now,” Brandon said, his voice commanding. “Leave.”
Owen looked at him and then at Marigold and then at all the medicine that was brought into the room.
“In case you haven’t noticed, Brandon, I am hurt as well.”
“I am sure you will find a hospitable home and a tender hand to take care of you.”
Owen chuckled and limped towards the door.
“Goodnight, Your Grace.” He bowed to Marigold, flinching, before turning to Brandon. “As for you, I hope you die.”
“Owen!” Marigold did not appreciate the jest.
The door closed, and now, they were alone. She still avoided looking at him. She just went to the bathroom to change the bloodied water for fresh water. Then she grabbed the bandages and started covering the wounds on his hands.
“Marigold…”
She effectively rendered him speechless by running the warm cloth over the wounds on his face, from his forehead to his cheeks to his nose and his lips. It was careful and precise, but it could not hide the anger underneath.
“You are angry,” he said.
“Hold still. Your nose is bleeding.”
“I can explain.”
“I am sure you can. Now, don’t move.”
Once more, she got up to bring fresh water. Every time the clear water became brownish red from his blood, she became paler.
“You have some blood on your shirt. Let me see,” Marigold said and reached for the buttons of his shirt.
“I will do it,” he suddenly felt warm.
But his fingers were swollen and bruised and uncooperative. He fumbled with the first button before she sighed.
“Let me.”
She undid the remaining buttons with almost clinical urgency, and yet each time her knuckles grazed his chest, he could barely hold still. He had been beaten up by a dozen men, and yet this feather touch was what undid him.
Suddenly, he realized that Marigold was too close, her bergamot scent filling up his nostrils, her loose curls caressing his arm. And she was looking at his bare torso with more than worry and care.
“This will definitely need something cold,” she said and grabbed a metallic box.
She placed it on his ribs where a bluish bruise had started to form. If she bit down on her jaw anymore, it would break.
“I am fine. I assure you, I am unscathed and—” he tried.
“Unscathed?” Marigold finally snapped and looked at him, eyes blazing. But he could tell it was not just anger. It was fear and worry tangled together in an explosive mixture. Marigold knew what he was after, but to see her so worried about him?
“You have deep cuts all over your hands and your body. Your nose is broken and perhaps one of your ribs, and you call this unscathed? Were you deliberately trying to make me a widow before you even made me your wife?”
“I did not think…”
“Clearly.”
It was the first time that Marigold had spoken to him this way, and if it weren’t for the tears ready to fall on her cheeks, he would be very happy with the development.
“It was supposed to be just reconnaissance. I needed to see how they would react.”
“Violently,” Marigold almost barked. “And I could have told you so from the safety of our dining room. Now, if your purpose was to see how many would be there to attack again, I would inform you using something called common sense that there would be more than two people could handle.”
“Your husband is hurt,” Brandon chuckled, “and you deploy sarcasm. How heartless of you, Your Grace.”
“Not as heartless as what you have done.” Marigold’s hands became a little rougher. “You walked into danger without any consideration for me.”
“I needed to know—”
“And I needed my husband to come back!” Marigold’s composed mask slipped.
For a few moments, they stared at each other. Her hands were shaking, and her eyes were bright. She was angry, yes. She was livid. But underneath there was also something else. Fear. She was afraid. And Brandon realized that for the first time in his life, someone was afraid for him, not of him.
“Marigold…”
“Do not.”
She turned away and was ready to get up, but Brandon caught her wrist gently. She froze and sat back down, looking at him. He waited until she settled, until she managed to control her breath even a little.
“It was important for the mission to have this information firsthand,” he said quietly.
“That is not an excuse,” Marigold said. “You deliberately walked into a trap for information.”
“It was not a trap if I knew what was going to happen.”
“If you knew what was going to happen and still did it, then you are cruel and inconsiderate.”
Brandon froze. Until that moment, he hadn’t realized how Marigold must be feeling. He thought it was just what one felt when dealing with a mischievous child. But as he was looking at her, he recognized the real dread.
For one moment, he put himself in her shoes. What would he feel if he saw Marigold brought back bloodied? And the first thing that rose inside him was crippling dread.
“I am not used to thinking that there was someone back home waiting for me.”
Marigold looked up, realizing how his life was before her. Lonely in the very true sense of the word. Pointless.
“I never had to be careful, Marigold,” he scoffed. “I have been reckless for so long that I forgot how to be anything else.”
Marigold raised her chin, looking away from him, and then looked down, biting her lip.
“You promised me you would be back for dinner,” she said with a trembling voice.
“I did, yes.”
“Did you forget I was back here waiting for you?”
When Marigold looked up with the question in her eyes, Brandon felt a pain sharper than anything all of Johnny’s men could have inflicted on him. He had managed to make his wife feel insignificant, powerless, scared, angry, and sad.
“I’m sorry,” he finally said.
Her eyes widened. She had not expected an apology, and truth be told, neither had he. He never apologized, but he could not just forgive himself for what he had done.
“I should have been more careful,” he said, sitting up a little. “I should have thought of you.”
The exhale that left her was the one thing that alleviated his pain. She took the salve and started applying it to his bruises.
“Just be more mindful next time,” she said. “I understand that this is important to you. You even married me for information to see this through. But…”
Brandon felt as if he had been punched repeatedly. This brave girl. He had managed to reduce her to a housekeeper and make her feel as if she were worthy only of her information and nothing more.
Perhaps he shouldn’t have tied her down to marriage with him. After all that had happened in her life, she deserved something good, and he was certainly not it.
“I will. I promise.”
She kept taking care of him in silence for a few minutes. He could see there was something else on her mind besides his state.
“Is everything in order?”
The question seemed to startle her. She looked up with those amber eyes pinned on his. It was as if he bathed in liquid gold.
“My mother came to visit today,” she said in one breath.
He frowned. That woman was bad news, and he really wanted her out of Marigold’s life.
“What did she want? Though I can guess.”
“I don’t know what to do, Your Grace.”
“First of all, I think we are past honorifics at this point. I even believe it is considered good taste to switch to first names when one has cleaned the other’s blood repeatedly in one night.”
A smile escaped her lips, and it was the best sound he had heard all day. It was one thing to promise that he would never make her worry again, but it was completely another to strive to make her feel exactly like she did this moment, relaxed and unguarded.
“I was not aware of such a rule,” Marigold played along. “What a gap in my education.”
“So tell me. What did your mother say?”
“She wants money.” Marigold looked down, twisting her nightgown between her fingers. “She says that now that Charlie is coming back from the colonies, she needs to establish herself.”
Marigold seemed to hesitate. She looked down, almost tears in her eyes. It still flabbergasted him how this woman could stay unwavering in her true self before all of life’s difficulties.
“I am sorry to say this about your mother, but I know she didn’t ask nicely.”
Marigold snorted and then felt instantly ashamed of herself.
“Tell me, Marigold. What did she say?”
“She threatened to spread rumors about me.”
Brandon growled in anger.
“It is what she does. She always threatens me.” Marigold looked down at her hands. “I thought about lying to you and asking for the money for myself. But I don’t want to lie to you. It would be hypocritical of me to chastise you for making me worry and then hide things from you too.”
Brandon felt all the bad feelings inside him, the pain, the anger, the anguish, and the shame, evaporate. Just because his wife chose him, even if it were to share the unbearable burden of an evil, absent parent.
“I don’t know what to do.” Her voice cracked. “If I give her money, I know that she will come back again and again for more. But if I don’t give it to her, she will make good on her threats because that is who she is.”
“And who would care?”
“Truthfully, I don’t mind about myself. I don’t care. I am used to rumors. But now, they will affect you too.”
Brandon knew that he was going to remember this day for the rest of his life.
He had been alone for so many years. He had no one worrying about him, and he certainly didn’t worry about himself.
And now, this girl came, who had been through hell over and over, and she still found it in her to worry about him.
“Look at me, Marigold.”
She obeyed. And just in time, another feeling came over him, a need, a desire, a deep-seated hunger that only she seemed to sate.
“We will deal with it together,” he said decisively.
Marigold’s face transformed. The worry lines on her forehead softened, the tension in her face relaxed. All the fear and uncertainty melted away. She, too, had been alone in her life, but now, she had him, and he was determined not to disappoint her.