Chapter 7
Cynthia
My heart pounds in my chest as the voice whispers around me. It’s Norhaven, the man I’ve been touching myself to in a most illicit manner. How is it that I can hear him admonishing me?
Squinting, I look about the room but see nothing but flames and shadows. That is, until one of those shadows moves, darting ever closer to my bed. Norhaven? But how can that be?
“I- I-”
“You what, my dear? Touching yourself in the middle of the night as your thighs slicken with arousal. Tell me, Miss Campbell, who did your mind conjure as you glided your fingers over your swollen clit? Henhaven? Has he really affected your mind in such a manner?”
My lips tremble as I stare into his eyes. They’re nearly black, deep, fathomless as he gazes at me, refusing to look away. Wrenching my hand away, I move to cleanse the slick from my fingertips, but Norhaven is there, descending on me like a wraith.
His hot, scalding tongue laps at my fingers, sucking on them as if he is a man possessed, depraved. My stomach flips about as arousal continues to drip from me, soaking the sheets underneath. Such exquisite agony, such painful bliss. I swear I might die because of it.
“Tell me, Miss Campbell,” he growls against my palm. “Who is it that causes you to drip with arousal?”
“I must confess,” I whisper, terrified that anyone else might hear this shame, this scandal. “It is you.”
“Me? Then tell me in explicit detail just what it is about me that has you twisting and bending, writhing in the sheets as you soak them?”
His breath skitters across my hand as his lips skim the surprisingly delicate surface until they settle on the pulse point in my wrist. Can he feel it? Can he tell just how furiously my heart pounds?
“I’m waiting, Miss Campbell. What has you in such a scandalous position to have your fingers betwixt your thighs like some errant ladybird flitting about in the night?”
“Y- your hands,” I moan out on a soft breath. “The way they discipline me.”
He pulls away and grins at me, his lips stretching wide as if to devour me whole. “And so you decided to be naughty once more? Shall I punish you, Miss Campbell? Shall I drive this ache from you?”
My body screams at him, demanding that I say yes. But this isn’t like old times. This isn’t some near-harmless lark I’m playing with the duchesses as they fall into their husbands’ arms and expect punishment and pleasure in equal measure.
No. This is far different. I am an engaged woman.
I belong to another. As much as I want to dally in this foray, as much as I want to give myself to him, to have him drape me over his lap and spank me until I can’t think or breathe, I’m not his to do so.
Not anymore. Such tasks would belong to Henhaven.
Would his punishments make my soul sing? Would they make me long to disobey just to feel the heat of his gaze and ire? Though I long for that to be true, I find no evidence as yet. Norhaven has always exuded such prowess, such masculinity.
Groaning, I scrunch my eyes closed, desperate to rid myself of the image of his phallus bobbing in front of me as he demanded closeness after he stripped me of my dignity. Such madness. Such insanity that I fear I cannot tell what I should do.
“You think too much,” Norhaven murmurs as he pulls me closer. “It’s a simple question with a simple answer. Do you wish for me to punish you?”
“I am no longer your concern,” I whimper as sadness, longing, and desperation all coalesce into a ragged cry in my throat. “Those duties are no longer yours. It’s not a burden you must bear.”
“Burden,” he snorts. “You must have come away from our little sessions with the wrong impression. Never once were my actions a burden. I merely said I would take you in hand to spare your father from scandal as a means to have you to myself. Trust me, little vexation, ‘twas never a burden.”
“Then why?” I trail off, not able to put the fears and worries into words.
“It’s complicated,” he sighs. “But the why doesn’t matter now. I went straight away to your father after service. I made my overture. He refused.”
Heat flushs through my cheeks as I watch Norhaven turn to stare at the fire. He looks so tired, so defeated. But he went to Father for me. He must actually care for me at least a little.
“So there is no hope then?” I ask, my voice soft.
“There is hope,” he growls as he turns back to me. “As long as I can uncover some form of scandal, and trust me, I will, your father will have no choice but to call it off and allow me to swoop in.”
I drag my knees up to my chest and rest my head on them. “Could we not just scandalize ourselves? We would have to get married then.”
The small muscles in Norhaven’s jaw jump a bit as he clenches it tight.
“I’ve thought of that. I’ve dreamt of pulling off some coup where no one could deny my claim.
If I were my own man, my own agent, I would fling open the windows and have the whole of London hear just how well I can pleasure you.
But I’m not. I am but part of a family.”
My heart sinks as tears burn my eyes. “The triplets,” I whisper.
“The triplets,” he agrees. “Were they already married, I wouldn’t have nearly the same burden as I do now. As it is, to attach such a scandal would taint them too. Though I am a selfish man at times, I find my duties will always include my family.”
“And honestly, I cherish you for that.”
“Right,” he agrees, his voice flat and dull. “But what good is it when we sit here, separated by an impenetrable gulf?” With a slight shifting of his body, he slides up the bed to lie next to me.
His arms are firm and warm as he pulls me into his chest. From behind, I hear and feel the strong purr emanating from him, soaking into me, making me boneless. If only it could always be like this.
“You truly think you can find a way to break this engagement?” I murmur as I snuggle into the cage of his arms.
“I might die trying, but I’ll do my damnedest.”
We lie there for what feels like an eternity. Not one word passes between us, but then, what else is there to say that hasn’t already been spoken? Pain lances my heart as I lie there, soaking in as much of Norhaven as I can. Only a handful of weeks. Not that many days for such a massive miracle.
After a little bit longer, he turns me toward him and tips my chin up so he can gaze into my eyes. Still, he doesn’t speak. All he does is lean down, brushing his lips with my own.
A kiss. A kiss from Norhaven. How long have I dreamt of this moment? My heart flutters behind the cage of bone as I wrap my arms around his neck, pulling him deep in. Even if all we have are these few stolen moments, I don’t want to miss out on a single one.
His fingers move over me, sliding the sheets down in a frantic motion. Once uncovered, those large, muscular hands skim up my thighs, taking my shift with them until I’m bare to his gaze.
This is different from all the other times. Never was I fully naked to him. It was only the pertinent bits he wished to torture, either with pleasure or pain. Turning away, I break the kiss, unable to look upon him as he stares at me.
“Don’t be shy now, love,” he chuckles as he turns my head back to him. “I’ve already memorized your form even if I haven’t seen it.”
“But suppose Henhaven should find out?” I whimper as fear and longing come together in sheer erotic terror.
“Then I suppose you simply must refuse to tell him anything. I can certainly keep this secret, Miss Campbell. Can you?”
My lips tremble as he leans in and captures them again with his, kissing me in a way that my soul has been begging for, has been longing for. It’s so easy to pretend I’m his. It’s so simple to just keep my eyes closed and pretend it’s all a dream. Only one thing determines to make it a nightmare.
Wrenching away, I gaze into his eyes as my entire being longs to melt into his arms. “Suppose you are unable to find a scandal? Suppose I am doomed to marry him? I will be touched, sullied, no longer pristine to be his wife. Won’t he be able to tell?”
“I understand your fear, my vexation,” he murmurs as he skims his lips down the side of my neck, pausing for a moment as he lingers at the point where it meets my shoulder.
“For what he requires in a marriage, you will be untouched. No matter what I do to you tonight, or any other night, your virginity will be intact. Our secret will go to the grave.”
“And if he bonds with me?” My soul screams to the heavens at that simple question. I don’t want to know. I don’t want to think of any other Alpha’s claim on my body except Norhaven’s.
“By that time, you will already be wed. ‘Twould be more of a scandal to throw you out. Besides, any indiscretion we do, he will still have what’s most important. He will have your maidenhead and bond.”
Again, that bit of heat tinges my cheeks. “And we are sure I still have my maidenhead? It hasn’t fled at the insistence of your fingers?”
“Shall I check?” Gone are the traces of sorrow etched on his face. Now, there’s that hint of mischief he only seems to show around me.
As tantalizing as the promise is in his eyes, that bite of fear holds me hostage. “I would like to know. If I am no longer a maid anyway, then there is no reason to keep pretending I will be a fit wife for anyone other than you.”
He simply nods and slips from the bed to walk over to the mantel. After a few moments, a lamp roars to life, and he brings it over, setting it on the floor before motioning me forward.
“Slide down to the edge,” he rasps. “Then spread your legs so I may examine you.”
I have no choice but to obey. As much as I long to stay ignorant, such luxury will also bring more fear. Better I know now than to find out in bed with Henhaven.
Once the backs of my knees rest against the hard wood, Norhaven’s fingers skim up my calves and then my thighs before easing them apart. His hot, ragged breath washes over my inner thighs, making me squirm as need and arousal assault me.
“So wet,” he murmurs, dragging his fingertips around my entrance then up to my clit where he moves them back and forth, drawing a gasp from my lips. “I fear I shall never tire of seeing how you react to me. And this is even without me punishing you.”
“Oh, I do think this is more than punishment enough,” I hiss as he pinches the delicate skin, causing me to arch up into his maddening touch.
“Well then,” he teases, drawing his hand away.
“If my touch is so uncomfortable, I will begin with the examination. Now, I am no physician, but I’ve been around enough during battle to know my way around the female anatomy.
Am I to make this as clinical and professional as possible.
Will that set your mind at ease, Miss Campbell? ”