Chapter 20
“Ineed a new hat,” Agnes declared, leading Dorothy and Violet up the road.
“Well, there’s the milliner,” Violet said mildly, pointing the familiar shop out. “Why not go in and see what they can make for you?”
“I do think you’re asking rather a lot,” Dorothy said. “After all, the ball is tomorrow. Do you think they’ll be able to have the hat you’re dreaming of ready for you in time?”
“Oh, I don’t worry about that,” Agnes laughed.
“Gabriel gave me plenty of money to purchase accessories for this ball, and we all know the way money can solve a problem. I’m sure the milliner will be able to have my hat ready in time.
” She pushed open the door to the little shop and they went inside.
Agnes went to speak to the shopkeeper, and Violet and Dorothy began looking at some hats that Dorothy knew neither of them planned to buy.
Agnes might have money for today’s outing, but she hadn’t brought any.
That had been a deliberate choice, an attempt to keep herself from spending recklessly.
If a lady was going to be a spinster, she had to be very mindful of the money she spent, to make sure she had enough to provide for herself throughout her life.
And Dorothy did not need a new hat today.
“So,” Violet said, keeping her voice low. “Are you still spending a lot of time with Nathaniel?”
Dorothy darted a glance at her friend.
“Jonathan mentioned that he had gone to your house,” Violet explained. “That’s interesting, isn't it, that he’d go out of his way to pay a call like that?”
“Don’t you start,” Dorothy groaned. “There really isn’t anything interesting about it, Violet. I’m only helping him with something.”
Agnes had returned. “Violet, you know that Nathaniel will never court anyone seriously,” she said. She turned to Dorothy. “Gabriel says he believes he’s looking for a wife, but Gabriel doesn’t think it’s going to happen. He just doesn’t know how to be serious about anything he does.”
“I don’t know,” Violet countered. “If you think back, Agnes, you were pretty rebellious before you married. And once you met Gabriel, everything changed for you. Perhaps Nathaniel is the same. Maybe when he meets the right lady, things will be different. Maybe he’ll finally decide that he’s ready to do what must be done. ”
“Is that what Jonathan thinks?” Dorothy chimed in curiously.
“It is,” Violet said. “Jonathan says that Nathaniel is just a little late to this stage of his life, and that once he finally does find a wife for himself, he’ll realize what he has been missing the whole time.”
“That’s a generous opinion,” Agnes said.
“You don’t care for Nathaniel, then?” Dorothy asked her friend.
“Oh, no, that isn’t what I mean to say,” Agnes said. “Nathaniel is very dear to us. I just wonder sometimes whether he has it in him to reach the next stage of his life at all.”
“Not everyone is meant to marry,” Dorothy said quietly. “Do you think of me as a child because I haven’t done so?”
“Of course we don’t,” Violet assured her. “Agnes was older than you are now when she married, don’t forget.”
“That’s right,” Agnes agreed. “And I haven’t lost hope that it will happen for you one day, Dorothy.”
Dorothy pressed her lips together, cursing herself.
She was the one who had taken the conversation in that direction—she’d invited that comment onto herself.
Of course Agnes was going to say something about her lack of prospects.
Everyone in Dorothy’s life seemed to want her to get married.
She counted herself fortunate that her friend hadn’t pushed the idea of a union with Nathaniel.
Everyone else seemed to be thinking in that direction.
“We know that not everyone can find marriage,” Violet said gently. “But Nathaniel does seem as though he wants to, and that makes it harder to believe that it will never happen. I think it will. I think that lies in his future. And whoever the lady is will be very lucky to have him.”
“I wouldn’t go that far,” Agnes chuckled. “I mean, I love Nathaniel as much as you do, Violet. He’s a good friend. But he would not make a good husband! So serious all the time, so grumpy…I’m glad Gabriel isn’t that way. He’d have me driven mad.”
“What do you think of him, Dorothy?” Violet asked. “You must have gotten to know him a bit better, if he’s visiting you at your home.”
“Why is he doing that, by the way?” Agnes asked.
“Oh…well, we just thought it would be a good idea for the two of us to befriend one another,” Dorothy said.
“You know, because I’m friends with the two of you, and he’s friends with your husbands.
We wanted to get to know each other better so that things wouldn’t be awkward the next time there’s a dinner party.
So, he came over to the house and had tea with my sisters and myself. It was a nice time.”
This was stretching the truth to the breaking point, and it made her feel nervous even to speak the words. Surely her friends would see right through her?
But if they did, no one said so. “Well, that will make life easier, I must admit,” Agnes said. “I think we were all worried that perhaps the two of you didn’t get along, so I’m glad it isn’t true.”
“She hasn’t actually said whether they get along,” Violet pointed out. “I’d like to think that you do as well, Dorothy, but you can tell us honestly. What do you think of him?”
“I don’t know,” Dorothy admitted. She was thinking about the other day, when he had stood in her sitting room and held her in his arms. The way he had asked for instruction to help him improve his flirting, and had immediately charmed her so effectively that she had forgotten what they were doing.
Even thinking about it, she felt her cheeks heat up.
She turned away from her friends on the premise of studying a hat.
“I don’t know much about him yet,” she said.
“I mean, we’ve had a few conversations, but the man really is a near stranger to me. ”
“He takes a long time to warm up,” Agnes said. “I don’t know him that well yet either. But I do find that he can be very engaging.”
“Do you? To me he always seems so cold,” Violet said. “I don’t know if I’ve ever seen him smile!”
I have, Dorothy thought but did not say aloud. Were his smiles truly so rare?
To her friends, she said, “I do notice that he seems a bit reserved. Much more so than either of your husbands. But I suppose I thought he was just a very quiet sort of man. Would you say that it’s something else?”
“No,” Violet said. “I’m sure it’s just that.”
“We don’t know very much about him,” Agnes said.
It occurred to Dorothy to wonder whether her friends knew about Colin. She had been so unclear about how much of a secret that was. Maybe now was her opportunity to find out. But she had to be subtle. This wasn’t a question she could ask directly.
She cleared her throat and picked up a hat, trying to make it seem as though she was just posing a casual question.
“Do you know anything about his family?” she asked.
“Perhaps that would explain more about why he is the way he is. I know I owe a lot of my character to my family. He’s unmarried, but is there anyone else? ”
Both ladies shook their heads. “He lives alone, for all I know,” Violet said.
That was interesting. So, one of two things was true.
Either he hadn’t told his best friends about his half-brother, or else he had told them and sworn them to secrecy so powerfully that they hadn’t even let their wives in on it.
Either way, it made the fact that Dorothy knew feel extremely powerful.
She wasn’t sure exactly how to feel about that, but she couldn’t deny the pleasant warmth that spread through her at the realization. It was something like pride.
It also meant she needed to be guarded with her friends. If Nathaniel didn’t want people to know about Colin, she wouldn’t be the one to give away his secret.
“What about his parents?” she pivoted. “Or any brothers or sisters?”
There were secrets here too, of course. If no one knew about Colin, she was certain her friends wouldn’t know anything about Nathaniel’s mother, about the fact that she’d left the family and started a new one. Would they know about his life at all?
How much of what he had told her was secret?
And why would he confide so deeply in me? Does he regret how open we were with one another that night? If I were in his shoes, I think I might regret it.
“I’ve never heard much about his family,” Agnes said. “Of course I know his father was the Duke of Henshaw before him, but that isn’t really any information. It doesn’t tell us what he was like, or how their relationship was.”
“It must have been all right, at least,” Violet reasoned. “Because we know his father didn’t disinherit him, and if he had despised him, he could have done that.”
“Yes,” Agnes mused. “There’s no reason to believe there was any real animosity there.”
Dorothy said nothing, just examined the hat in her hands. They really didn’t know about his life, then. Did anyone know? What about their husbands? Or was this just a secret from everyone?”
“What I’d wonder about is his mother,” Agnes went on. “I’ve never heard about any Duchess of Henshaw, have you, Violet?”
“I haven’t,” Violet agreed. “And I’m sure I would have remembered if I had. That seems like the kind of thing you recall about a person—what he has to say about his mother. Especially as you’re becoming a mother yourself, Agnes.”
Agnes laughed. “Do you think that means I start memorizing the names of everyone else’s mothers?” she asked. “You’re so silly sometimes, Violet. But she’s also right,” she added to Dorothy. “I don’t think anyone has ever mentioned a Duchess of Henshaw. It’s almost as if the woman doesn’t exist.”
Almost.
“For all we know, she doesn’t,” Violet said. “I mean, of course he must have had a mother once upon a time, but perhaps she died long ago. If that’s the case, it’s clear to me that his father never remarried.”
“Which would explain why he doesn’t know what to do when it comes to ladies,” Agnes chuckled.
“What makes you think he doesn’t know what to do with ladies?” Dorothy asked, setting the hat back on its rack and turning toward her friends.
“Well, it’s obvious, isn’t it?” Agnes asked. “He’s trying to find a wife, allegedly, but he hasn’t managed to do so. That makes it clear to me that he doesn’t know where to begin. He’s hopeless.”
Dorothy thought back to their encounter in the sitting room.
He’d needed instruction, it was true. But the moment he had received it, he had immediately intuited what to do next.
He could have swept me off my feet if he had wanted to, she was forced to admit to herself.
She hadn’t stopped him from doing so. He’d had to be the one to back away.
She had been utterly helpless in his hands.
That was terrifying.
But there was one thing you could not say about the Duke of Henshaw. And that was that he didn’t know what to do with a lady.
He knew far more than anyone could have anticipated.