CHAPTER TWELVE
EMMERY
“Imiss him,” Briar said.
In Fionn’s room, Briar clutched her brother’s hand, while Emmery stroked Millie’s feathered head.
After weeks spent at Fionn’s side, the serpent had thankfully stopped darting under the covers each time Emmery entered the room.
But she could hardly blame the poor thing.
Most days Millie just coiled around Fionn’s arm and pressed a disheartened hiss into his skin like it could reach him in his unconscious state.
Emmery eyed Aera snuggled at Fionn’s feet. Her soft snores filled the otherwise quiet room as she slept. Usually Emmery would find Brennen curled up at Fionn’s side with his head over his heart, like the steady rhythm guided him, sustained him, but today he’d been otherwise occupied.
“I miss him too,” Emmery agreed. And she really did; she missed a lot of things about him.
His silent laugh that shook his shoulders, his unfiltered quips that left her helplessly belly laughing until it hurt, and his otherwise quiet demeanour.
They too shared an unexplained draw between them, like Briar and her had, where they just worked.
Maybe, despite her stolen memories, her body remembered their past so their connection lived in her flesh.
Emmery’s eyes follow Briar’s finger as it traced along Fionn’s serpent tattoo. The dark ink coiled from his hand up the length of his left arm to his neck, and tapered at his temple like the worst of Briar’s visible burns.
Fionn’s frail body brought a fluttering concern to Emmery’s gut.
The castle healer, a wrinkly man with a stout belly, had assured her Fionn received necessary nutrients with his daily injections.
He’d always been thin, but this was a new extreme.
She had tried to heal him with her silver threads, but evidently bone ash blocked magic, and while it swam in his bloodstream, her magic couldn’t touch him. It didn’t stop her from trying.
Briar whispered loudly into her brother’s ear, “If you can hear me Fifi, you should know I’m pissed at you for doing this to yourself. And a less than polite talking to is waiting for you the second you open your eyes.”
A smile tugged at Emmery’s lips. “At this rate he’ll never wake. Mostly to hide from your wrath, Bri.”
“This isn’t the first time he’s done this.” She patted Fionn’s hand before she dropped it onto the bed and flopped down beside him. “Alright so Vesper told me something happened between you and Fi beyond the gate. I’m afraid to ask but I feel I need to know.”
Emmery’s brow lifted. “Vesper told you?”
“Only that he went across before it was sealed and that he gave you that book you were carrying earlier. And that ring.” As Briar nodded at the oval blood ruby on Emmery’s third finger, she suppressed the urge to hide her hand under the quilt.
“Now, I know my brother and that, all of it, doesn’t sound like him.
Were you two … involved, or am I missing something? ”
“No. No. He took care of me after my sister died. I was a wreck after Mae passed.” It was a gross understatement, because, really, he’d kept her alive.
Emmery retrieved the black leather book from the side table and placed it in her lap.
She opened the cover to flick through the pages yellowed by time.
“Do you know anything about it? Zyphira claims it had to do with my implexus.” Emmery bit her lip to suppress her blush.
“I think he might have … written it for me.” It sounded insane, but the book had been handwritten by someone, and now that she had delved more into the story, the main character, Evryn, and his love for Nyssa, she did feel in her soul that maybe Shade had written this book for her.
But what it all meant, she wasn’t sure. This couldn’t be a real series of events.
This was fiction. No one loved someone this much.
“Sounds romantic.” Briar winked then eyed the book.
“I’ve never seen it before, but I know Fionn was always an enthusiastic reader.
And blood rubies are only used for union jewelry.
For a votai. So if Fionn gave that to you, then I would assume you were more than friends.
” She batted her lashes. “I can hardly blame him for being in love with you. You’re so dreamy. ”
Emmery snorted and tossed a pillow at her. Briar dodged and jostled Fionn as it landed with a plush thud on the floor. Emmery cringed. It was likely in poor taste to be tossing things over someone in a coma.
“You know, I would ask Fionn if he was madly in love with me, but it’s difficult to communicate with someone who won’t even offer a nod or a simple thumbs up.
” It seemed she didn’t know a lot about him, including his drug use.
Briar shared a bit about how he’d tried it when he was young and it got better every time, until it didn’t.
And at that point, it was too late. She said it was around the time they’d been beckoned by the gods and completed their trial, but Fionn was left behind.
Emmery couldn’t imagine how irreparably separated from everyone he felt and she wished he’d wake up just so she could tell him it would be alright.
Not that it would bother him in this state, but Emmery brushed a strand of raven black hair back from Fionn’s face. As Emmery pulled away Briar hissed a curse under her breath. That’s when Emmery caught Briar studying her palm, and her stomach sank.
After Vesper’s tongue lashing about the pactum, she didn’t need it from Briar too. It was done, and couldn’t be undone.
“So you and Old Thorny really made a deal? Do you think that’s wise? Because I thought you were smarter than that.”
Emmery groaned as she dove into her hands like she could hide from her choices. “It’s for the prophecy. To retrieve my memories and find the man from my dreams. The one I told you about with green eyes.” She peeked over the protective shield of her fingers. “It was an easy choice.”
“Easy choice? You’re kidding. He’s not only dangerous, but unpredictable, too, and did you forget that he forced Ves into his service for a century?
He killed his deranged father to take over this kingdom only to run it into the ground and the guy has serious daddy issues along with his other mental issues. ”
Emmery shook her head to dislodge her doubts.
“I—I know what he did to Iz and Vesper. How his kingdom is fairing and the things he’s allowed.
” She exhaled a long breath. “But I need to get to the bottom of this prophecy to stop this fever. And I need to get my memories back. My memories are the only way to learn what happened and I’m tired of hearing things I’ve experienced from other people’s mouths.
” Aera stirred at Fionn’s feet at Emmery’s rising pitch.
“I need to know why I did the things I did. Why things unfolded like that.”
“Why you blew up the Merikhs’ kingdom?”
Emmery’s face fell.
Briar only shrugged. “What? You did.”
“You could have put it gently.”
She pinched her bottom lip between two fingers before she released it with a pop.
“This world is too bloodthirsty for niceties or soft truths. It’s a courtesy most of us aren’t shown.
” As if on cue, the sunlight illuminated her scars, each patch of skin a reminder of her suffering. Her heart wrenching childhood aside.
As if counting down, Emmery spun her ring on her finger, and on the fourth turn, she said, “I’m really sorry about what happened to you. And I wish I could take it back. I wish I could undo it.”
Briar’s brows creased. “I’m not angry with you if that’s what you think.
But I won’t lie, sometimes I wish it hadn’t happened, because the months following all this—” She gestured to the side of her body.
“They were rough. Agony, really. But now I have all these badass scars and a badass story to go with them.”
A winded sigh of relief left Emmery. “I’m not sure you ever told me.”
“I was saving a pup from the fire. The owners left the dog locked in the house. Just abandoned it like a bunch of ingrates.”
This brought a curl to Emmery’s lips, but the smile died as doubt stole it. “I like to think I would have done the same, but I’m not sure I would.”
“She’s proof you would.” Bri gestured to the sleeping Aera, then examined her red polished nails that matched her jumpsuit.
Emmery stared down at her own blunt nails bitten down to the quick.
She flipped over her palm to study the rose wrapped in thorns which sang a mocking tune of her mistakes.
And above it, on her wrist, the tiny white spark reminded her of another decision she’d made.
But the bargain with the ancient dragon Arborious was the least of her worries.
The humming magic in Emmery’s veins that rattled her bones in moments when she let her guard down, when she forgot who and what she was, reminded her to keep her power tightly leashed.
And that she could inflict irreparable destruction in the blink of an eye.
“I killed all those people,” she whispered. The confession in her broken voice numbed her. It didn’t feel real, but it had happened, and she needed to atone for what she’d done.
“I know,” Briar said, not accusingly, but in acknowledgment. “You’re also our only hope to abolish this cursed fever.”
Emmery picked at her nail until a bead of blood rose and she sucked her finger into her mouth.
She fell back into the memory of the day she’d relit the khaos flame and tried to save them all—how Melantha’s shadows had coiled around her like chains, not to hurt her, but like she wished to steal her away.
And the former Queen’s voice rang through her mind: Kahlia of the Eternal Sky.
She will wake now you have called upon her.
Emmery shuddered
She would tackle one problem at a time, and for now learning to swim and finding answers about this book from Fionn took priority. She prayed for him to finally open his damn eyes and answer all her endless questions.
The fate of their world depended on it.