CHAPTER SIXTY
EMMERY
When Destonne returned to Blackdawn Castle, Emmery waited, perched in an armchair in the sitting room.
Aside from the moonlight, only the golden glow from a single flickering flame lit the room.
She dragged her finger through the fire, as all the things she needed to say circled her tongue.
She'd rehearsed them tenfold, and yet as she sat there, she couldn’t breathe.
Once again, her world had crumbled and his answers would either mend the pieces or force her to rebuild. Whatever he said, she knew it would hurt. It was only a matter of how much.
As Destonne stepped into the sitting room and snicked the door shut behind him, he took her in as she did him.
For a moment, nothing felt different, and if she kept this all to herself, pretended it didn’t happen, it could be.
But she couldn’t now that these truths surfaced like a stale corpse in the sea—bloated, disfigured, and unfathomably heavy.
His cheeks were adorably pinked from the night air, his hair ruffled after being tucked under his hood, and the second he saw her, his eyes lit up in a way that speared a mix of untethered anger and hurt through her chest.
She wanted to run to him.
But she wouldn’t. Not anymore. Not after what he did.
“I thought you might be asleep,” he said. He shucked off his gloves and tossed them onto a nearby table, followed by his cloak. “I was inventing all sorts of delightful ways to wake you, since you’re the first person I wanted to see.”
“Me too,” she whispered. Her lips shaped into a faux smile. It wasn’t a lie. She’d been dying the last few days. Waiting.
He donned casual black clothes like those he’d worn in Malheim, the ones that made him someone else entirely. In those, he was Dez. In his button up shirts and capes, he was Destonne O’Daire, the cruel King of Asaella. Reconciling between the two was messy, tiresome, and left her empty.
Because she wanted both and couldn’t have either.
As he crossed the room, her heart banged against her ribcage, stretching for him as if it wanted to break in the palms of his hands instead of in her chest where it already lay cracked beyond repair.
Dez gathered her in his arms, his breath warm in her hair as he placed a kiss onto the top of her head.
It brought her back to how he had been her sanctuary in the labyrinth, her home when she woke days ago, and her strength the months she’d struggled.
She rested her cheek against his chest, allowing herself to sink into him one last time, until she peered up at him and steeled herself, turning her blood to ice and skin to stone. “Where did you go?”
“To find answers about my magic. It called for an in-person visit.” He pressed his face into her hair, and murmured, “I know it was only a few days, but I missed you.”
Her shoulders tensed though his words sounded so sincere. They weren’t. Couldn’t be. And it was the last blade she’d allow in her back.
Dez reached under her chin and tilted her face up to his, but she shrugged out of his arms and nodded at the chair. “Sit,” she ordered.
His brow arched. “Why don’t we retire to my room, so I can show you exactly how much I missed you?”
She placed a hand on his chest and gave him a shove until he folded into the chair. “It wasn’t a request.”
“Now who’s being bossy?” he teased. As she climbed atop him and settled into his lap, Dez grasped her hips and chuckled softly.
“Em, someone could walk in.” His breathing sped and his fingers dug into the fabric of her trousers like he debated tearing them off right there and devouring her.
“Actually, let them. They would be so lucky.”
He leaned in, to close that space, to kiss her, claim her, but little did he know that would never happen again. Only a hair's breadth from his lips, she placed her hand on his chest and held him back. She let that tension wind, crank, revelled in him withering beneath her as she stole his power.
She’d learned from the best after all.
He groaned in frustration and it only fueled her.
Then she slowly leaned in, savouring the catch of his breath, as she whispered, “Why did you lie to me, Destonne?”
He stilled, even his chest halted, and he was quiet for such a long stretch she thought he hadn’t heard her. That he’d suddenly fallen deaf. But eventually another deception wheezed out of him. “I’ve never lied to you.”
“I’ll ask again,” she purred, fire in her eyes. “Why are you lying to me?”
“I’m—” His throat worked. “I think you’re mistaken. Did you—what happened?”
“I’ll start with an easy question, and your answer will dictate how this night goes.” She skimmed her lips up the side of his neck to his ear and he shuddered. “Can you explain why your handwriting matches my book?”
He drew a shaky breath. “I haven’t a clue what you’re talking about.”
“Did you know you write your D’s in a very distinct way? And your O’s.” Her sigh down his neck made his skin prickle and fingers tighten on her.
“You think I’m your Shade? Is that it?” He huffed a laugh. “While I’m flattered, it’s a bit of a stretch, don’t you think? I read it cover to cover.” He blinked at her. “I would know if I wrote it.”
Again, like before, he worked around the truth and didn’t answer directly.
“I wracked my brain, trying to figure out why you would have done it and what could possibly be in it for you. And for the life of me, I can’t decide if this was some long game or if it’s merely a coincidence.
” She tilted her head at him. “Unless of course you know who Shade is and kept it from me.”
“If I knew, don’t you think I would have told you already? We have a deal. And I always make good on my deals.” He cleared his throat. “Now that we have that sorted—”
She leaned forward and added, “I know about the Council.”
Those words sucked all the oxygen from the room.
He didn’t speak, didn’t breathe, and if he perished at that moment, she wouldn’t have known the difference from his preternatural stillness.
She continued, “I know your plan. Once you were done with me, you were going to hand me over, weren’t you? Like Vesper did. Because even though you said you’re trying to be a better man, that’s a lie too.”
He pinched the bridge of his nose. “It’s not what you think.”
“Then why did you keep it from me? If you weren’t planning on selling me off, why is it a big deal?”
As he slowly shook his head, the tip of his nose brushed hers.
“The Council doesn't know you’re here. And frankly, I haven’t a clue what they need you for, nor do I want to know.
They ordered your retrieval months ago, but I never planned to let them have you.
” The words needled their way under her skin, and she wanted to believe him. She really did. But she didn’t.
“Is that supposed to make this better?” She leaned back and met his eyes to reveal the burning anger in hers. “How could you do this to me?”
“What exactly do you think I’m doing? I’ve done everything to ensure it doesn’t happen.” His eyes became soulless, like gazing at a shark about to strike. “Do you know how many loopholes I had to find to fight the compulsion?”
Her stomach soured and the word sat on her tongue, gritty as ash. “What do you mean … compulsion?”
His chest filled with air, as if admitting this aloud stole all his strength. “The crown,” he breathed, the words bitter. “They control it. Them and my father. He went missing, but the Council is still here. I’m trying to fix this. To work around it, but—”
“I don’t believe a single word you say anymore. Because if you weren’t lying”—Emmery raised her hand between them and flashed that smattering of red marks—“then what do you call this?”
His eyes flared wide, and he opened his mouth, but no sound came.
“Should I offer some options?” The repulsive slime of his treachery slithered through her gut and Emmery’s top lip curled in a sneer. “Betrayal? Deceit? Because I would call this the deepest breach of trust.”
He cleared his throat. “That’s different. You didn’t want to talk about it, remember? In fact, you insisted we didn’t.”
“Don’t put this on me,” she snarled. Her hand heated as her anger boiled. She sparked a single flicker of flame to her fingertip and held it under his chin. “What the fuck did you do?”
His eyes widened, but he didn’t shrink away from her fire. The mask he always wore fell over his face, and he hid behind it like a coward.
Gods, that hurt. It hurt so much to have that barrier between them again when she thought she had cracked it. She’d been wrong about so many things.
“What did I do?” he hissed. “You were the one who started it. You tasted my blood first. You would have gorged yourself on it if I let you. I merely seized the opportunity. More like I tested it.”
The rage she’d harboured the last few days surfaced, her heart thundering and her flames pricking her skin, ready to burst through. “You bonded us!”
Unveiled and condemning, the statement hung in the air.
Dez opened his mouth, likely to spew some more bullshit, but she put a finger to his lips.
“And the funny thing is, not a single person I’ve talked to knows what this is.
Because apparently it’s some bond that doesn’t exist. It doesn’t exist, and yet, here we are.
” She fisted his shirt and fed a trickle more magic into the flame beneath his chin.
“I think you planned this all along and it’s all part of some sick agenda you have.
And I’m just a pawn. I have been all along, haven’t I? ”
Her khaos flame singed his skin as he leaned into it, though he didn’t so much as wince. “I’m trying to protect you, Emmery. Can’t you see that?”
He raised his hand to her face, but she yanked away, stood from his lap, and stalked across the room. To get far away from him and his deceit.
“Protect me? You could have told me the damn truth! You lied to me. Took advantage of me while I was on some drug.”
“If you recall,” he drawled, “I was on it too. I’m sure you know I wouldn’t have done that in sound mind.”