Chapter 19 #2
I tried to ignore everyone around me and focused on the lot.
Thankfully, the school was empty, with just a few stray cars near the gym.
I was driving in a giant circle around the large parking lot with virtually zero chances of danger.
I could do this—slow and steady, with no sudden movements. No crashes. No casualties.
Maybe this was all right.
Maybe I overreacted all those years ago.
“Perfect, Alex,” Julian encouraged. “Keep it smooth, easy turns.”
I nodded, easing the car around the curve of the lot. The wheel moved smoothly under my hands. A slight twinge of confidence was growing inside me, a tiny spark of pride warming my chest.
“Why don't we try parking?” Julian said.
“I don't know about that,” Lucas said. “That's how I got whiplash the last time.”
I scowled at my brother. “Don't be a backseat driver.”
I turned the wheel to the right, aiming for one of the painted parking spots on the far side.
My foot was steady on the pedal, my hands precise.
Everything felt controlled, the tension in my shoulders easing, and my body relaxing.
“I've got this,” I muttered under my breath.
I pushed my foot slightly down on the gas, and the car responded perfectly, gliding forward with a gentle ease.
Maybe parking wasn't so terrible.
Maybe—
Maybe I should have picked a parking spot that wasn't in front of a light post …
I pressed the brakes, slowing the car to a crawl as I prepared to ease into the space.
The wheel turned under my fingers like magic, the post lining up perfectly with the vehicle.
I could feel the triumph building, a smug grin creeping onto my face, and then .
.. I saw it. In the rearview mirror, Kayla's hand moved towards Lucas's. Their fingers intertwined.
My stomach dropped. What the—
I turned my head, curiosity pulling me to look at them, completely forgetting to put the car in park.
My stomach dropped as the vehicle began to roll forward.
Panic surged through me, and in a moment of sheer terror, I pressed the gas pedal instead of the brake.
The car lunged forward violently, a wild beast escaping its restraints.
We charged towards the light post. The car’s bumper collided with the metal pole with a loud crunch.
The car stopped, but the damage was already done.
There was a moment of silence as we tried to process what had happened.
To make matters worse, Kayla was still holding hands with my brother.
Embarrassment ached in my stomach. Betrayal and anger burned inside my chest. And a bit of terror mixed with panic shook me to my very bones.
No one dared to speak first. I let out a long, slow breath, pried my fingers from the wheel, and sank deep into the seat.
My cheeks were burning, and humiliation rolled over me.
My breath felt suffocated, and I had to get out of the car.
I quickly unbuckled my seat belt and pushed the car door open, my hands shaking as I stepped out, gravel crunching underneath my sneakers.
A metallic taste of anxiety laced with anger coated my tongue, a deep acid burning inside my chest that had nothing to do with the car crash.
I glanced back to see Kayla and Lucas still sitting in the back seat, their hands untangling slowly like neither of them had realized they were intertwined with each other just seconds ago.
The distant sound of the fire department and police sirens was muffled by the sound of my pulse pounding in my ears. Someone in the school must have seen me plow into their light and called the cops.
Lucas was the first to swing open the car door, fumbling slightly as he climbed out onto the asphalt. Kayla followed closely behind. My mother and Julian chose to remain firmly seated.
Words suddenly escaped from my mouth. “After what she did to you, Lucas, you're just going to take her back? One night of delusion, and you're ready to forgive everything?” The bitterness of the words lingered in my mouth.
They both stood there, frozen. I knew I was overreacting, and I understood that they had every right to be together.
But if I couldn't have Jamie, why should they have each other?
I realized I was being selfish and bitter, but today, of all days, I couldn't bear to watch them build the life I would never have with Jamie.
“Alex, it's not—” Kayla’s voice was soft but scratchy like nails on a chalkboard. I wasn't in the mood for excuses. Not today.
I took a step closer, my arms crossing tightly over my chest. “Not what? Not you playing Lucas again?” My gaze flicked between them.
Kayla glanced at Lucas, desperately searching for backup, but Lucas stood silent. His shoulders were stiff, and his mouth was sealed. “Why can't you let it go? I thought last night may have changed things.”
“Because it's not fair!” I screamed.
The distant wail of sirens sliced through the air, their red and blue lights flashing in the corner of my eye. Julian stepped out of the car, leaning against the hood. The fire department, police, and EMTs surrounded us. We stood there awkwardly, silent, as one of the police officers approached.
“All right, folks,” he said, stopping in front of Julian. “Mind telling us what happened here?”
Julian rubbed the back of his neck. “I let Alex drive.” He pointed toward the fallen light post, now lying pathetically on the ground with wires poking out, still smoking slightly from sparks.
“Again, Alex? You hit the school again?” the police officer said, mouth wide open. Everyone was aware of my driving record.
“It was an accident! And I only hit the light, not the building this time.”
“Uh-huh. Sure, that makes it better.” He scribbled something down on his notepad. “The fire department needs to check the light, while the EMTs must examine everyone in the car. It's standard procedure to ensure no one is hurt. You know the drill.”
Yes, I knew the drill.
“We're fine,” I said quickly, but he didn't seem to care.
And that's when I heard a familiar voice.
“You three okay over here?”
The voice was low, familiar in a way that felt like a memory.
As I turned my head to look, the intense sun blinded me.
Blinking rapidly, I attempted to focus my eyes and adjust to the sudden change in brightness.
My mind played a trick on me for a fleeting moment, and I caught sight of Jamie's father.
My heart leaped into my throat, and a cold sweat broke out on my forehead.
I knew my imagination was running wild, but it still made my body freeze.
The last thing I wanted was to see that man anywhere near me.
My eyes widened as I blinked rapidly, and my vision cleared, allowing me to see better.Not possible.
I rubbed my eyes again.
Why is the image not changing?
I blinked again. What was in those pancakes? I must have been hallucinating.
But I wasn’t. No matter how many times I blinked, the person standing before me never changed. Jamie’s dad was standing three feet from me, wearing an EMT uniform, hair slicked back, and clutching a first aid kit.
My heart stopped. It didn't race like it usually did when panic settled in; it just stopped.
The last time I saw Jamie's dad was when I ran out of his trailer after discovering Kayla in Jamie's bed.
That was the last time I saw Jamie in five years, until last month when he knocked on my apartment door in Boston.
A wave of vertigo washed over me, and the air spun.
I had to steady myself against the car door to avoid losing my balance.
Everything blurred and swirled as the world faded into darkness.
My vision turned black, and my mind shut off, leaving me with nothing but the cold, sweet embrace of nothingness.