Chapter 17 Jasmine
There were no more messages in the new group chat.
And I certainly wasn’t going to start another conversation, no way. Especially since the last message was mine, asking who was staying over tonight.
No response.
Ouch. For some reason that… stung.
What could I have added?
“Sorry for making you all aroused and nearly lose your shit at the breakfast table. I actually had a really nice time. Can we do it again? I promise not to touch you with my darkness.”
And if the silent chat wasn’t enough indication that something was wrong, that the morning had definitely caused some type of rift, the way Ezekial is being with me right now is another.
He’d come to collect me and Kacey from the atrium this evening. She’d tried to leave early, but I didn’t allow it, saying I needed her support to face the awkwardness I knew was heading my way.
And Ezekial hasn’t said a word.
Yesterday, he had me pinned against the very door I’m now inches from. But today? He’s closer to the shadows—his escape—than he is me.
A barely-there smile, a brief glance, and that’s all I’ve had.
Kacey’s already raced ahead into the apartment, but I’m lingering. So I take a big breath and turn back to face him.
“Just, spit it out,” I sigh the words, which only makes his prickly apprehension flare.
The four of them have done well at toning down their powers, but their emotions were always on display, maybe except Kane.
“Something’s happened,” he says, and the vagueness of it has me rolling my eyes. “I don’t want to worry you.”
My brows dart up. “That’s funny, because you’re drenched in it.”
I see him try to shut down those emotions, but once I’ve had a taste, you can’t simply revoke them.
I step closer. “Don’t try to hide from me, Ezekial.” I keep my voice soft. “Just tell me.”
He looks so uncertain. His normal warmth is tainted with a cold dread that has my tendrils reaching out, brushing over his crossed arms. His gaze tracks their touches, my expression.
“Is it Kane?” I suggest, hating how concerned I sound. “Has he changed his mind after what happened this morning? Because you can tell me, I’ll understand, even though I never meant to—”
“What? No, Jasmine. No.” His heavy frown and narrowed gaze leaves no room for miscommunication.
“I know my brother’s given you many reasons to doubt him, but don’t doubt him on this.
On you.” He steps closer. “He may deem himself unworthy, but he wants you, this. He’s made that clear… to me at least.”
Has he made that clear to me though?
He’s made it clear he never wanted to hurt me… even though he did. He’s made it clear he regrets those things. That he would walk away from the unit if I couldn’t accept him. Is it really far-fetched to imagine he’s changed his mind?
“It’s Julien,” Zeek blurts. He sees my panic, then my confusion and quickly continues. “After this morning, his hunger has gotten worse. We’ve had to detain him.”
A sharp slice scores my lungs, hitching my breath. “Is it something I did?”
His frown deepens, and finally, the spiky mixture of fear and dread eases.
“No, no, ana mea.” That little nickname melts the slice into a flutter. “This is a struggle Julien has always battled. He just needs… distance.”
The slicing returns tenfold.
I pull my bottom lip in, dig in my teeth as I slowly nod.
“And the others are with him?” I ask, he nods and my brows draw tight. “Shouldn’t you be with him?”
Nervous apprehension blooms again.
“I don’t want to leave you,” he admits quietly. “The last time we left you…” He turns away, dropping his head.
The night I fled their house in the capital, jumped out a window, imprisoned in a cell, beaten, chained, left to bleed out like an animal carcass.
I shake my head, clear those visions away.
“Ezekial, go to him.” His eyes flick to mine, mouth open, ready to rebuke. “I’m a big girl, I can take care of myself, and this time is different to then. I want you to go to him.”
But he bats my words away with a soft frown, re-straightening to his solid, tense height.
My chin tilts higher, crossing my own arms as I stare up at him. “You said you’d do anything I asked. I’m asking you to do this.” My gaze is full of determination and defiance.
He holds strong, for barely a second.
“I can’t leave you.” The broken sound of his voice clutches at my heart. My expression softens as more words spill from him. “If anything happened to you, the thought of losing you… We’ve just got you back. I can’t—”
My tendrils expand, engulfing his entire body in thin lines of black, then they pulse. I siphon away all his anxiety with that one action and he falls to his knees.
I stare into his hazy eyes, level with his from one small downwards tilt of my head.
“I think you’re forgetting something, my lord.
” His irises fluctuate from blinding silver to deep grey, and when I place a gentle touch upon his shoulder, they both darken.
“I am your bond, equal to you in every way, power included. I do not need protection.” Entwined with the dark, some of the words echo. “But I do need you to be with Julien.”
Goddesses, this feels good.
Right.
My darkness pulses in agreement, drawing a soft groan from the powerful Council member who stays on his knees before me—for me.
I’m almost certain he can stand, if he wanted to, and the fact he doesn’t is invigorating.
My fingers drift along the edges of his face, feather-light, brushing over the dark and grey stubble at his jaw while his mismatched eyes stay tethered to mine.
Everything about him is a beautiful contrast.
“Tell me you understand,” I order softly, my hand anchored to him.
He turns his face into my hand, lips brushing my palm as he looks up at me—one eye pitch black, the other a stormy silver.
“I understand, ana mea,” he murmurs, his breath warm against my skin, his lips lingering there.
The sensation from that single touch races through me. I thought I was in control, but when he begins to rise, my hand falling, tendrils dissolving like black cobwebs, I realise it was him who allowed this.
All of it.
He once told me there was power in submitting. Now I’m starting to see that.
“I’ll come back.”
My mouth parts to argue—Julien needs him, I know it—but the words die in my throat when Ezekial’s hand cups my face.
His thumb presses gently but firmly against my mouth, closing my lips.
“I know you can protect yourself. I was never doubting your strength.” His voice lowers, and the pad of his thumb brushes against my lips in a lingering caress.
The touch unravels me, and as I lean into it, his eyes never stray from mine when he adds, “I was only ever doubting my own.”
I should pull away. I know I should.
Especially when his other hand trails down the curve of my spine, fingers coming to rest on my hip in a warm, solid grip that sends sparks through me.
“You know we’re not equal.” My brows furrow, but not for long. He closes the small space between us, guiding my chin up with gentle pressure as he lowers his face.
His gaze searches mine, sweeping between my eyes. “You are so much more.”
The lights in the foyer flicker. A tremor runs through the air.
My coils rush out of me, instinctive and desperate, wrapping around him, clinging to his body. But shadows stretch towards us, curling like greedy fingers to take him away.
“I’ll come back,” he murmurs, skimming my mouth once more with his thumb… then he melts away into the shadows.
I blink until the colours settle back, then head straight into the apartment. Without hesitation, I scoop up the bag waiting for me behind the door and clutch it to my chest.
I’m unsteady, restless, but as I draw out the cool fabric and press it close, the ground steadies beneath me.
Now, I’m wearing it and nothing else.
It smells like Kane. More than that, it feels like him, as though his darkness is stitched into every thread, his cool calmness spilling over my bare skin.
I bury my nose into the chest fabric, inhaling deeply, before letting it fall down to my knees.
I would die of embarrassment if they saw me like this, or I’d most likely try to murder them… but here, in this room, behind my four walls—I’ll allow it. I’ll pretend this means nothing.
It’s just a piece of fabric I liked the look of.
That he gave me.
That he picked out a bag for, and neatly folded, and remembered to bring with him.
Nothing more.
It means nothing.
I repeat that mantra as I stare at my silent phone, waiting for something.
Worry gnaws my gut as time tips into the early hours of the morning.
I can’t sleep—won’t—until one of them comes back.
And then I feel Ezekial.
Calming waves of warmth roll through me, blending with the soothing coolness of his brother’s hoodie. I groan, sinking deeper into the mattress under the mix of sensations, edging closer to the wall.
The wall—my newest nemesis in my ever-growing roster.
I reach out, fingertips reaching cool plaster, then flatten my hand fully. Wisps of emotions are all I’m able to grasp, but it’s enough to know the overwhelming dread no longer drains him. He’s more at ease, calmer—
“You should be asleep.” I shiver at Ezekial’s soft internal voice as it slips into my mind.
I don’t even remember dropping my mental wall…
“How was he?” I ask, shifting a little closer.
“Better. I was able to help him clear some of the dark. For now.” The uncertainty in those last words seeps through the brick. “Thank you for making me go to him.”
“Can I help?”
“You already are.” His voice softens, threaded with gratitude. “Just knowing you’re here... it helps more than you realise.” My fingers curl against the wall. “Sleep. We’ll speak more tomorrow.”
***
I wake up with my knees, nose, and lips pressed against the wall. But there’s no warmth.
Ezekial isn’t there.
Kacey’s gentle knock comes before she slips inside, another peace offering—a black coffee.