Chapter 18
Chapter
Eighteen
With dread paralyzing me, it took longer to will my body to move.
I passed by the pairs of guards and entered the marble hall through the newly built massive door made of wood and metal. The sun’s dying light filtered through the stained-glass windows.
Lit candles and incense filled the space with a fragrant aroma of lavender and rosemary. But the incense tasted bitter and pungent, like campfire smoke.
As I put one foot in front of the other, I walked by the new pillars, running my fingers over the cold marble.
Above me, elegant archways stretched over the entire room, adding to the hollowness of the space.
Workers had rebuilt the spacious room, and now it looked almost unrecognizable, but the same chandelier hung from the ceiling—resilient and beautiful.
The hall was one of my favorite places in the kingdom. But not anymore.
My soft footsteps broke the silence that hung thick and heavy in the air.
The only people inside were my parents and Hayden. My father stood under the chandelier while my mom stood at Dad’s side.
The marking ritual would complete the mate bond between me and Hayden. It was a ceremony to thank the Fates for bringing mates together and showing commitment as they pledged to stay together and respect and support each other for the rest of their lives.
A bond Hayden had forged by violating my consent. I ground my teeth and winced.
Mating is for life. Marking is irreversible. The words thundered in my mind, sending cold chills down my spine.
As I walked down the makeshift aisle, my gaze fell on Hayden.
Usually, the mates would dress up for the ritual like at a human wedding with a groom and bride.
His dress pants were deep charcoal gray with a straight cut, emphasizing his long legs.
His button-up white shirt hung open at the collar, causing me to swallow at the sight of his smooth skin and the ridges of his muscles.
As I closed the distance between us, I felt out of place, and everything felt wrong. The soft fabric of my dress made the skin above my knees itch, and the slender belt cinching around my waist squeezed too tight.
I pulled the deep V-neck collar up, feeling self-conscious. I didn’t want to look like I was seducing Hayden with the extra exposed skin on my chest and shoulders, but this was the only dress that would allow him to mark me.
Dad, standing beside Hayden, wore a serious, hard expression. He acted as the master of the ritual.
When I reached my mate, he grasped my hands, and my dad began his speech.
“As your King, I wish to unite you today as mates. Be blessed as a mated couple with love and harmony. I wish your good days are filled with peace and the bad days with strength to endure.”
As Dad continued to speak, I glanced at my mom. Her eyes shone bright with moisture and aimed at the marble floor. Switching my gaze to Dad, I noticed a slight frown on his face.
“Does the couple have anything to exchange?” my dad finally asked.
Mates usually exchanged vows and not jewelry, since shifting into their animals made it difficult to wear accessories.
But I wasn’t ever going to shift.
Hayden’s intense gaze fell to the bare skin of my neck and chest. He must have expected I’d wear the golden daisy necklace he’d given me for my birthday. More guilt washed over me because I couldn’t even remember where I’d left it in my bedroom.
Glancing between Dad and me, Hayden’s lips curved in a half smile. “It was short notice. I’ll give Breanna lots of jewelry later, and I don’t expect anything from her except her love.”
Now the weight of the guilt crushed me as if it were an angry tsunami.
Then Hayden leaned in and whispered in my ear, “You have already given me the best gift.”
I drew a deep breath. I didn’t regret sleeping with Hayden three years ago. But I wasn’t sure if I could forgive him for his actions while I slept in his arms. My body trembled, and I fought the urge to step back from him.
Hayden straightened up, looking at me. “I have a few words to say to my mate.”
I swallowed hard, feeling awkward since I hadn’t prepared anything.
“I promise to cherish you for the rest of our lives, to protect you with everything I have. And to help you raise our children with which we may be blessed together.”
My stomach flipped, and I felt like I might hyperventilate. I hadn’t thought that far into my future…where Hayden stood by my side. Could I have kids with Hayden? Did I want to?
I didn’t know what to do with my hands, so I pulled them away from Hayden’s grasp and clasped them together. I lowered my gaze to the floor, but Hayden lifted my chin with his index finger. I was sure guilt showed all over my face.
I was supposed to be a happy bride, so to speak. But instead, a few silent tears rolled down.
“Why are you crying, sweetheart?”
“I’m okay.”
He eyed me and let go of my face. My parents’ gazes burned into me, but I ignored them. I was doing this for them, too.
The next part of the ritual was the marking, the mates biting each other’s neck to claim their partner. Blood was life, and exchanging it was believed to tie the mates together for the rest of their lives.
The first exchange of blood should have been at the marking ritual.
But Hayden had taken the liberty of bonding himself to me three years ago.
I had never told Dad about what Hayden had done.
I feared my father would dismiss Hayden’s outrageous act, as Dad was set on declaring war against the vampire Queen.
Or if my father decided to banish Hayden, I wouldn’t ascend as the next Queen.
And I wouldn’t have been able to free Torin.
I pressed my lips together, but then my mate stepped into me, his presence enveloping me and sending shivers down my spine. He reached out, gently caressing my cheek, then slid his fingers down my shoulder, leaving a hot trail of tingles.
His other hand pressed my body by the small of my back into his, igniting the fire within me.
With eyes burning with a mix of intensity and raw desire, Hayden leaned into the crook of my neck and scraped my flesh with sharp fangs I couldn’t remember seeing before.
They looked different, not even like Torin’s unique vampire fangs.
Why would Hayden’s look unfamiliar? I had seen his wolf form before, and his canines hadn’t stood out then.
I realized Hayden’s head tilted in such a way that perhaps my parents couldn’t see his fangs since they didn’t seem alarmed. I jolted when his warm breath brushed against my skin, his fangs hovering above my neck.
I didn’t have much time to ponder when the stabbing pain ignited at my shoulder and radiated down to my chest. The initial pain was sharp and intense, causing me to gasp.
But as the bond solidified, a wave of euphoria washed over me, erasing the pain and replacing it with an powerful pleasure that vibrated deep in my core.
The surge of energy flowing through my veins was the entwining of our destinies, and I knew my life was forever changed.
After retracting his fangs, Hayden licked over the puncture wounds immediately and placed small kisses there. The pain completely subsided, and when Hayden pressed his lips against mine, I detected a metallic, salty taste.
He pulled away and looked at me expectantly with a mixture of possessiveness and love. “You’re mine, sweetheart.”
I chewed my lip. Now I was supposed to claim Hayden and swallow his blood, but my human teeth wouldn’t pierce his flesh the way his fangs did mine. I looked around for something sharp, but there wasn’t anything I could use.
Having figured out what I wanted, Hayden bit his wrist and extended it to me. My heart pounded behind my chest as I prepared for our destinies to unite forever. With trembling hands, I grasped Hayden’s arm. He reassured me with a soft, understanding nod.
I brought my lips closer to his wrist, feeling the warmth radiating from his skin. A soft gasp escaped his lips as I drew in the first drops of blood. I peered through my lashes at my mate.
His face was a picture of pure ecstasy while I sucked from the minor wounds, swallowing his blood. As the tangy, coppery taste met my tongue, a rush of emotions flooded my senses—his courage, unwavering determination, and loyalty—as if I were drinking his very essence.
But something passed through my body that scared me. With the depths of the invisible force of our mate bond, I could sense Hayden’s presence, his intense love for me carving grooves with our shared connection.
At first, I thought I felt his love for me over our bond, but his desire was rawer and deeper, wrapping around me like a snake. The intensity of his emotion left me breathless.
Then it struck me. This uncomfortable feeling overwhelming, seeping into me, was Hayden’s obsession with me. He craved me with each cell of his body, making me shudder. I had sensed his intense feelings before, but now I could taste his obsession.
He let out a small moan, which was my cue to pull away from his wrist. I released my grip on his arm and lifted my gaze to Hayden. Our eyes locked. I stood before my mate, hyperaware of him and his every move, with many emotions, mine and his, swirling within my soul.
Running my fingers over the raw skin where Hayden had marked me, I felt Hayden’s protection and passion for me, but there was still a void within my heart full of doubts and fears that plagued me.
I thought I would find my home with Hayden once we completely forged our mate bond. But despite the myriad of emotions, belonging to him wasn’t something I experienced.
Usually, the marked couple would rush back to their bedchambers immediately after the ritual to complete it with full mating. How was I going to avoid the mating part with Hayden?