Chapter 67
SIXTY-SEVEN
Cane
I watch her eyes, looking for some sign of hesitancy. I search her face and feel her hand in mine. She smiles and hands her bouquet to Kari, looking far less anxious than I am.
The officiant clears his throat, and we turn to face him. He starts the ceremony, saying all the things we went over earlier. I try to listen to what he says but can’t help but be distracted.
I watch Jada out of the corner of my eye. She’s absolutely peaceful as she watches the man droning on before us. She seems perfectly content, like she’s listening to someone read a book.
I take a deep breath and blow it out.
Just a few more minutes.
“On this day, you blend two lives into one. Though your new life together will have hopes and disappointments, successes and failures, pleasures and pains, you will battle through them all as one unit. The sand ceremony is to remind you of the blending of your lives. And, although you are now one, may you continue to radiate the traits that drew you to one another.”
I lead Jada to the table and pick up the golden sand. She picks up the pink, and we pour our sand into the empty vessel, our respective colors mixing. She grins up at me, and I fight myself from blurting out something hostile and making the officiant skip to the good part.
I grab Jada’s hand and guide her back in front of the officiant. He talks again, and I wait for Max to give me the ring. I know he’s paying attention because that’s what Max does.
My palms begin to sweat as this guy goes on and on.
We get it. This thing is forever, and we have to treat each other right. Come on, man. Hurry the fuck up.
Shit! I shouldn’t think like that about a man of God. I’m going to hell.
Forgive me, Father, please. But hurry him up, too, will ya?
After what feels like far too long, Max hands me Jada’s ring.
Jada
Cane takes the ring from Max and turns to face me.
His shy smile streaks across his face, making him look so vulnerable.
It almost breaks my heart, in a way. I glance around the room quickly and realize no one is here for him.
He has no family here to watch this part of his life.
No one from his past, no friends, no one that’s ever loved him. Just Max.
I want to wrap my arms around him and smother him with kisses. I want to kiss away all the pain, the loneliness I know he feels on some level. But I don’t because I know the best way to fix him is to give him me.
He reaches for my left hand and begins to slip the band on. I wait for the officiant to say “repeat after me” like they do in ceremonies, but he doesn’t. My breath hitches in my throat when Cane begins to speak.
“They sent me a lot of canned language they said I’d have to repeat today, but I couldn’t do it,” he says softly. So softly, that I’m not sure if anyone can hear it but me.
“None of those words say what I want to say to you. But then I sat down and couldn’t figure out what I wanted to say either.”
He brings his eyes to mine and smiles. “I promise to love you until the day I die. I promise to protect you without thought, to push you to achieve your dreams, and to try to be the man you deserve.
“I promise to send you flowers for anniversaries, texts for no reason, and to kiss you in the rain. I promise to be faithful to you and only you for the rest of my life.”
“You remembered ...” I whisper, the words coming out in hiccupped sobs. My heart squeezes, so in love with this man that I almost can’t deal with it.
“You’ve given me everything I didn’t even know I wanted, Jada. You give me a reason to stop being the coach.” He winks.
I can’t help but laugh, my chest shaking with the force of my tears.
“I always felt like a part of me was missing. But when I found you, I found what was missing. It’s like you had my heart my whole life, and it’s just now that I’m put back together.
You connect my life, put all the pieces into one man.
And it’s with this ring, I give you all of these promises and my last name. With this ring, I give you ... me.”
He gazes into my eyes, his filling with tears. It causes my own to flow harder. He wipes them away with the pads of his thumb, his skin rough and warm against my skin.
He leans in to kiss me and the officiant clears his throat. “Not yet, Cane.”
The crowd laughs. A low growl emits from his throat, and I giggle.
Kari steps beside me and hands me a platinum wedding band, simple and masculine, for Cane. It’s exactly his style, and I know he’s picked it out. That makes me happy.
I glance at the officiant, and he smiles kindly.
“Would you like to repeat a set of vows or say something on your own?” he asks softly.
I tell him that I’ll repeat a set of vows because I have nothing planned. I had no idea I’d need them today. But as I start to speak, I realize I can’t. I don’t want to. I don’t know what I’m going to say, but I want him to know I love him more than a set of preconceived promises.
I take his hand and hold it in mine. I slip the band over his ring finger and then encapsulate his palm in my hands.
I can barely see through the fog of tears as I begin to speak. “I wanted to have something beautiful to say to you, some speech with wonderful words that told you how much I love you. But in typical Cane fashion, you just sprang this on me.”
The crowd laughs, and I laugh, too.
“But that’s one of the things I love most about you. Your passion, your drive. Your determination once you set your sights on something. I love the way you go after things, the way you went after me.
“When I look into your eyes, I see more love and respect than I’ve ever seen reflected back at me before.
I promise to give you the same love and respect every day until I die.
I promise to take care of you, to stand by your side when things are great and when they’re challenging, and I will push you to be everything you can be.
I’ll be your lover, your wife, but most of all, I’ll always be your friend.
And I promise to make cookies with you in the middle of the night any time you want.
With this ring, I give you all those promises and my heart and soul. Forever.”
My voice breaks as the emotion takes over. Cane shakes his hand out of mine and wraps his arms around me.
“By the power vested in me by the State of Nevada ...”
I don’t hear the rest. Cane’s lips are on mine, my tears staining his cheeks. He pulls back just enough to whisper, “I love you, baby,” and kisses me again.