Chapter Forty Four #2
‘Perhaps that’s what I need,’ he joked, though upon seeing her disapproving expression, added with a smirk, ‘I’ll stick to the one drop.’
???
Kyra.
‘I’d be wary if I were you, Mankar,’ Zuriel’s high, mocking voice carried through the air. ‘If you like your bones intact, I would stop now.’
Sweat dripping from her brow, breath puffing in white clouds against the air, Kyra turned to see the Eternal sauntering over to the training square on the Summit.
‘Ignore her,’ Mankar said with a slight roll of his eyes.
‘I’ll reserve my warnings for someone who heeds them, then.’
‘Not helpful, Zuri.’
Innocently, Zuriel said, ‘I only came to watch Kyra’s progress.’ Her eyes glittered with amused malice. ‘Your skills were atrocious the last time I witnessed them. Before you cheated with Warden magic, of course.’
‘Don’t make me regret my apology,’ Kyra warned. Shortly after the Fire Warden’s initiation into the Eternal Order, Kyra had found Zuriel and managed to, however sheepishly, grind out a rather embarrassed apology for what had happened in the crypts.
Her response had been nothing more than a short and bitter, okay. Kyra hadn’t spoken to her since.
‘I never needed a pitiful apology,’ Zuriel said indifferently. ‘Though I think you might find more use in practising your magic rather than tussling in the snow with this brute. You know, save breaking someone else from the inside out by accident.’
Kyra almost told her to fuck off, but Mankar beat her to it, in his own way. ‘You healed just fine, Zuri,’ he said dismissively, then leaned an elbow on Kyra’s shoulder. ‘Train with us. For the record, Kyra is a much better student than you ever were.’
His voice was light and jesting, but Zuriel bristled. ‘If only all her teachers thought the same.’
Kyra knew she meant Naal.
She’d avoided the Air Warden completely these past two weeks. Had rarely shown up for dinner, had refused Naal’s requests to join her on the Summit to continue their magic practice, instead throwing herself into physical training with Mankar… alongside other physical escapades with Kawai.
Distractions all around.
‘Zuriel,’ Mankar warned in a low voice. ‘You are not helping.’
Kyra had offloaded to him in the fortnight that had passed, finding in him an unlikely friend after sheepishly asking if he would train with her in combat.
It was a dance she was comfortable with, a dance that was familiar and one she was good at.
She hadn’t told Mankar everything that had transpired in Avaldale, but just enough for him to know that she was tormented by shame and grief.
She didn’t want his pity, but to have him jump to her defence was rather heart-warming.
‘I wasn’t trying to help,’ Zuriel said bluntly, then shrugged. ‘Come find me if you want round two, Kyra. See if you can refrain from relying on your untamed magic to win this time.’
‘She is such a bitch,’ said Kyra angrily once Zuriel had flown away.
Mankar chuckled. ‘She certainly can be.’
‘But why?’ Kyra demanded. ‘Even before the incident, she was a bitch to me. Why? What does she have against me?’
Mankar tossed her the mothsilk cloak. Now they had stopped duelling, the freezing air would swiftly come biting. ‘You want the truth?’ Kyra gave him a look as if to say I’m waiting. ‘She’s jealous of you, Kyra.’
A dark laugh escaped her then. ‘Jealous of what, exactly? Being the worst fucking Warden to have ever-’
‘I thought I told you to stop talking about yourself like that?’
Kyra refrained from rolling her eyes. Aside from Kawai, Mankar had been the only one who had given her the time of day. Maida smiled at her now and then, but nothing beyond pleasantries. And Nysari couldn’t have cared less about her. ‘Fine. What is she jealous of?’
‘Your relationship with Naal.’
She laughed again. ‘She’s delusional, then. Naal and I aren’t exactly the best of friends at the moment.’
Mankar grimaced at that. ‘Zuri has never felt like she belonged here. She is much younger than the rest of us, and though none of us care who sired her, she believes her half-akee blood makes her lesser. She has spent her life trying to prove herself. And when Naal made Nys her Third…’ Mankar blew out a breath, ‘well, let us just say Zuri was not happy about it. At all.
‘Then you came into our lives and I believe she felt like Naal was slipping away from her.’ Mankar’s expression became withdrawn.
‘Her life began in neglect. She knows her father would have killed her given the chance. I think that has always stayed with her. I still do not think she believes she belongs here. As an Eternal. Or even as Naal’s family. ’
Kyra said quietly, ‘Naal loves her.’
‘Of course she does,’ Mankar agreed. ‘But Zuri needs Naal’s validation. And though I would never admit this to the pramah… I don’t think she sees that side of Zuri.’
Goddess damn this male. Now she pitied Zuriel.
‘I understand her more than most,’ Mankar said, then hesitated before saying, ‘We were together once. Zuri and I.’
Kyra hadn’t seen that coming. ‘You’re joking?’
He gave a small smile. ‘I loved her. I still do.’ He frowned. ‘I think I always will.’
‘What ended it?’
‘She did,’ he said casually, but his voice was tinged with sadness. ‘To this day, I don’t really know why. I was good for her. I know I was.’
‘I don’t doubt that.’
Mankar smiled again, then sheathed his sword. ‘I know Zuriel is… how she is. But try not to hate her. I think she feels just as alone as you do.’
???
Gedeon.
Later that night, Gedeon stared up at the crooked ceiling, wide awake.
The pain-lessening tonic was working its magic, though instead of a dull ache as he had been relentlessly experiencing, there was now an incessant itch in its place he couldn’t reach, lest he dive inside his own back to scratch it.
As Maida had warned, the taste had been foul, and he cursed himself for not chasing it with some wine. Or something stronger.
Knuckles rapped softly at his door. Gedeon looked up with a frown.
It was late. No one ever knocked for him. No one except-
‘Sunsi,’ he said by way of greeting as he opened the door. ‘Why-’
‘I couldn’t sleep,’ she interrupted. ‘Can I-?’
‘By all means,’ he said, stepping aside to allow her into his room.
They had not seen each other much since the trial. Only infrequent times such as this, when she would call on him and they would sit in near silence as though they’d forgotten how to talk to one another. He expected tonight to be no different.
She stopped in the centre of the room, and the light of the dying embers in the hearth set her skin aglow. Dressed in a nightgown, shoulders draped with a grey shawl, her hair hanging loose around her shoulders… she was a sight to behold. Bathed in this orange hue, she was regal.
As soon as the door clicked shut, she turned to him.
Her eyes were glassy. ‘I miss Zarynth, Gedeon. I’m grateful that we have been pardoned by the Air Warden…
but this isn’t my home. The Base needs me, and yet I can never return.
Not if I want my head to stay atop my shoulders.
Not to mention it’s unbearably cold here.
’ She perched on the armchair by the hearth and wrapped her arms around herself.
‘I’m sorry… to come in here and whine. You’re the only familiar thing in this unfamiliar place. ’
Gedeon moved to stand by her side. ‘It is I who is sorry, Sunsi,’ he murmured. ‘I wish there had been a way to not involve you in this.’
Sunsi was quiet for a moment, staring blankly into the shimmering coals.
Finally, she said, ‘Had I not been involved, you wouldn’t be here at all.
You and Amala would not have escaped your mother’s wrath.
And had you never seen the Base, you wouldn’t have seen why action needed to be taken.
I regret nothing, even if my heart aches for what once was.
’ Her features softened. ‘But… I want to thank you, Gedeon. For giving Zarynth a chance at survival. You’ll be a great Emperor one day. ’
‘Emperor,’ he repeated dully.
In truth, the thought had not crossed his mind. That once his mother had been dethroned, and Sekun sequestered for his crimes against Droria, that the natural succession would fall to him. Without thinking, he said, ‘I don’t want to sit upon the Black Throne.’
‘I thought you might say that,’ Sunsi said with a sad smile. ‘Your unwillingness to rule unfortunately makes you the best candidate for the job. Once our people have seen how you have fought for their liberation, they will want you as their leader. As their king.’
Gedeon tried to imagine it. Sitting upon that ancient blackened wood, building an Empire from the rubble of the wars to come. He had always been a male of duty. If that were to be his new position, however much he may dislike it… so be it.
He glanced at the strong woman at his side. ‘Will you rule beside me?’
She blinked. ‘As… as your…’
‘Advisor,’ Gedeon said quickly, realising his mistake.
Sunsi loosed a short, breathy laugh. ‘Thank Eraura. I thought that was a marriage proposal.’
‘Not quite,’ said Gedeon through a smirk, then added, ‘Though, you would make an exemplary Empress.’
She chuckled again. ‘I think you and I might be cursed, Gedeon. Nothing good has ever come from our union.’
‘There were some good things.’ Sunsi shot him a withering glance. Gedeon smirked. ‘I would be honoured to establish a new friendship with you, Sunsi. One that does not involve… that.’
‘I’d like that too.’ She stood. ‘Why do you avoid the dinner hall?’
‘Naal thought it best I stay away. For the time being.’
Sunsi pursed her lips. ‘Did she order it?’
‘No.’
‘Then, I suggest you come,’ she said boldly. ‘Give these people the chance to get to know you.’
‘I doubt they want to know me at all, Sunsi.’
‘Regardless, if you are to be Emperor one day, these people will be the first to either advocate for your succession or ensure you never sit the Black Throne. Now is the time to begin making allies, Gedeon. And who knows… possibly even friendships.’
‘You are already proving to be the wisest royal advisor that ever was.’
Sunsi’s eyes glowed with pride. For herself or for him, he couldn’t tell. For a moment, they simply stared at one another.
What might it have been like, if he had allowed himself to feel for this woman? To love her, to cherish her, to fight for her, to be the sire of her children?
Her auburn hair might have spilled over his chest every morning, those freckles might have been covered in the ghosts of his lips.
In another life, perhaps.
But not this one.
Sunsi deserved someone’s whole heart. And Gedeon knew his could never belong to her.