Chapter Twenty-Three
ROME
The phone rang, and every part of me hoped no one would pick up.
I could have gone through Will to get to my contact, who could look into the finances of their dad.
I would have preferred to reach out to Will…
it would have been easier. I didn’t want to avoid facing him any longer, though.
Malachi. My best friend, whom I had dutifully avoided for months.
It was about time I faced the music. If he was angry, mad, upset… I needed to face it.
I didn’t want to be like this anymore. Self-isolating from my past and the people who had defined it.
I wanted to be better for my family, for me…
and for Bec. I wanted to prove to her that I was worth it, that I was good enough for her.
Anyone with eyes could see how out of my league she was, yet she chose me. I wanted to be better for us.
I had been actively avoiding Malachi since I had moved back to New York City. It was easier to dodge his phone calls and avoid my feelings than to face it all head-on. He was… or at least had been my best friend. I didn’t deserve that title anymore. Not after I had failed him.
“Hello?” A familiar feminine voice asked quietly as she picked up the phone.
Damn, I had really hoped no one was going to pick up. I had even called late in the hopes they would already be asleep.
“Hey, Rose,” I answered. I wasn’t sure if Malachi answering would have been better or worse than Rose picking up. As his wife, I knew she would fight to the death for him, and I was nervous she was angrier than Malachi was at my actions and subsequent avoidance.
I heard a sharp intake of breath from her.
“Oh my God, Rome. Hi!” She exclaimed in surprise.
“Hey,” I mumbled, “is… umm… is Malachi there? I need to talk to him.”
She laughed softly, “Yeah, he’s here. And yes, you do need to talk to him. Give me a sec, and don’t you dare hang up, Cipriani, or I’ll fly to you myself and whack you over the head. You’re lucky I haven’t done it already.”
I couldn’t help but chuckle. I could just imagine her scolding me with her finger, one hand on her hip.
We hadn’t known each other for very long, but we had hit it off instantaneously.
I had heard about her for years from Malachi and loved her for him long before they were married.
The thing about Malachi—and well, many of the people I cared about outside of my family—was that he was more reserved.
Much like Bec. He isolated himself from everyone when we first met in the military, then I came crashing in.
I seemed to have a habit of breaking down people’s walls and making them my friends.
“I won’t hang up, I promise,” I placated.
That was one promise to her I could keep.
I heard the phone being set down, and her calling for Malachi in the distance.
“Everything okay?” he asked, his voice sounding clear as if he had just entered the room.
I had gone from seeing and talking to him every day to silence for months.
Hearing my best friend’s voice after everything that had happened, just instantly slammed me in my chest like hurricane-force winds…
taking my breath away. It was strange to hear his voice again, even over the phone.
“Someone’s on the phone for you,” Rose explained, bringing me back to the present moment and reminding me to breathe. “Hand me that baby.”
I hadn’t met their son yet. He was only a few months old, and I didn’t even know his name. It was just another failure to add to my ever-growing list. For so long, I could tell you what Malachi had for breakfast each day. Now, it was wild how little I knew about his life.
“What?” he asked over the phone, his voice as grouchy as I remembered. I swear that man was only happy with his family, and sometimes me. Or at least he was happy around me.
“Hey, Malachi,” I mumbled.
The line was quiet. Too quiet. I couldn’t even hear him breathing. I wondered if he had hung up after hearing my voice.
It was what I deserved.
“Malachi?” I asked.
“Holy shit,” he mumbled, “Rome? Is that really you?”
“Yeah… umm… I was wondering if we could talk about some stuff if you have the time.”
He audibly exhaled, and I could hear him sit down. “I always have time for you, Rome. What’s going on?”
“I don’t even know where to begin…” I explained truthfully.
“The beginning would be best.”
He was right. I took a steadying breath and told him… everything.
I told him about Bec, about the letters she had been receiving, and the rumors her father was spreading.
I told him about Bec and me entering into a fake relationship for her job, and how it has since evolved into something real.
I told him about the incident, about watching Bec be snatched away from me.
I even told him how helpless I had felt in those moments, and the fear that had flooded my veins.
I told him everything I could think of, the words falling out before my brain had time to catch up to it all.
It was over an hour of me explaining the details and situations of the last few months.
I even told him about my realization that I was drawn to grouchy assholes like him, which wasn’t necessary, but apparently I talk when I'm nervous.
Malachi didn’t interject, didn’t ask questions, simply hummed in occasional acknowledgment, letting me know he was listening. He was never much of a talker, but it worked out because I was.
When I finally got to the end of the story, I paused, waiting for him to respond. To yell at me for what I had done, and for ignoring him for over half a year. Maybe ask questions about the letters Bec had been receiving, or the incident that had occurred.
But of course, none of that was his first question.
“You actually have a girlfriend?” Malachi asked, clearly shocked. “Like a real, breathing girlfriend? Not just a fling? Or a one-night stand?”
I huffed a laugh, “After everything I just told you, that’s what you’re hung up on? Me having a girlfriend?”
“Do you blame me?” He asked in a joking tone. “No offense, man, in the entire time I’ve known you, you haven’t even shown interest in having a real relationship. In fact, I remember you having to wear ballcaps and hoodies when we went out because of the amount of scorned lovers you had.”
“Scorned lovers?” I laughed.
“Mmhmm. Don’t you remember all the times you would pretend to be with me to avoid a previous hookup?” God, I hadn’t remembered that, but it had been hilarious to see how red Malachi got at the insinuation. “Rome, I didn’t know you knew how to have a girlfriend.”
“I don’t,” I admitted. “I have zero idea what I’m doing, but she’s still here, so I must be doing something right.”
Malachi laughed, “I guess you are. She’s lucky to have you. Truly, brother. Anyway, what is it exactly that you need from me? How can I help?”
“Wait, what?” I asked in shock, “That’s it? No other questions? No other concerns?” I could just imagine him rolling his eyes at me. God, I should have realized how similar he was to Bec. Maybe I did have a type.
“Rome, remember what you always used to tell me when you did anything for me? Even if it was just listening to me on the rare occasions I would open up… ‘It’s what friends do,’” he said, mimicking my voice. “So I’ll ask again… what do you need from me?”
I closed my eyes and took a steadying breath. I did not deserve to have Malachi as a friend, not anymore.
“Why don’t you hate me?” I asked, my voice quiet.
“Why would I?” Malachi asked back, sounding genuinely confused.
“After what happened,” I explained. “You were hurt, Rose could have been hurt, Damien died because of me. Because I failed you. How could you ever forgive me for that?”
“Rome,” he sighed. “If anything, I don’t deserve your forgiveness.
Did you forget why you were in that position in the first place?
You left the Army, retired before you had planned, to follow me across states so I could be close to my family.
You were in that position, trying to keep me safe, and trying to keep my family safe.
You almost died that night. If anything, you should be angry at me. ”
“No, not at all… it’s what…”
“Friends do,” Malachi finished for me. “Exactly. Look… what happened majorly sucked. We lost Damien and multiple people were hurt, but none of it was your fault. Okay?”
“I want to believe that,” I murmured, “but I don’t know how.”
“Well, calling me back is a start. Eventually, you’ll work through it all,” Malchi explained. “And maybe try therapy, it’s done wonders for me.”
“You know, in therapy you have to talk, right?” I joked. “That doesn’t really seem like you. I can just imagine you silently glaring at your therapist for an hour every week.”
Malachi laughed, “Yeah, it took me a couple of months to really open up, but I got there. I was going to tell you about it… but once again, you never picked up the phone.”
“I’m sorry.”
“Eh, it’s all water under the bridge. You called now, that’s what matters.”
I smiled, grateful to be talking to him once again. There were few people in this world who understood what it was like to be in the Army, and I was grateful to have someone in my corner who did. “I hear you have a kid now. How’s it being a dad?”
“We all know I practically raised you,” Malachi mused. “This one is far easier to manage.”
“Hey!” I protested with a laugh, but knew he was right. He was a few years older than me, but far wiser.
Malachi laughed along with me, “On a real note, Roman is an incredible little guy, and thank God he’s like his mom and not like me.
Looks like her too. Has the most gorgeous black hair and brown eyes…
he kind of looks like you. Rose and I joke that he’s your affair baby.
I think we’re losing our minds in the newborn haze over here.
I haven’t gotten a full night's sleep since he was born…” He continued to talk about his son and his life with him now, but I was stuck on his name.
“You named him Roman?” I eventually interrupted.
“Yeah, it was Rose’s idea. After everything you did for us, it seemed right to honor you in some way,” Malachi explained, his voice soft. “Rose did refuse to name him Rome, saying it would just set him up for bullying in the future.”
I let out a teary laugh. “Yeah, trust me, it would. I still get bullied about the name to this day. But, Roman James? Really?”
“Really,” Malachi confirmed. “Do me a favor, when all of this is over, you fly out here and officially meet him? And bring that girlfriend of yours because I’m not entirely sure she’s real. Or knows about your relationship.”
“Very funny,” I retorted.
We didn’t talk for much longer, Malachi needing to get back to his family. I did manage to get him to agree to reach out to his sister-in-law though, who worked in law enforcement, to look into Bec’s dad’s finances. He promised to have her give me a call by tomorrow at the latest before he hung up.
I sat on my bed, the phone still in my hand. Something in my chest felt lighter, like I could finally take a full breath. My guilt wasn’t wiped away, but it didn’t linger in every recess of my mind anymore.
A soft knock sounded on the door before Bec peeked her head in, “Can I come in?”
I nodded and finally set the phone down.
Bec sat on the bed next to me, taking my hand in hers. She didn’t say anything, and didn’t ask how the conversation went. She simply rested her head on my shoulder, hand in hers, holding space for me.
“He named his kid after me,” I murmured.
I could feel Bec smile, “Poor kid.”