23. Chapter 23
twenty-three
Jamie
“ J amie, focus.” Wes snaps his fingers in front of my face, and I jerk out of the trance I’ve been in for the last few minutes. It’s his own fault. He put like seven spreadsheets in front of me and my brain instantly scrambled them all.
I’m running on about six hours of sleep total this weekend between Noel and a couple of shifts at the bar.
This morning, I woke up to her in my bed, the blanket slipped down her body, showing me everything from her dark hair spilled over her shoulders to those sexy dimples above her ass.
My body was spent and wrung out, and I still couldn’t decide if I wanted to slip back under for another few hours, or climb over her, wake her with my mouth, and go again. I chose the latter.
“Yeah, looks good, man.” I shove the spreadsheets away, hoping he can’t tell I have no idea what I’m agreeing to.
Wes scoops the papers into a stack, tapping them on his desk. “Fine. Agenda item two: NEBev. I hope you took some time on your vacation to think about it.”
I snort. “By vacation, do you mean my doctor-ordered time off?”
“Seems to me, if you can work behind the bar again, you can take a meeting with their guys. This isn’t the kind of decision you make at game time.”
I close my eyes and rub at my temples. If he actually thinks I’ve been avoiding thinking about this decision all together, he has less faith in me than I thought.
There was a time when Wes and I had more to say to each other than just this tug-o-war, and if I’m honest, I miss it.
The first summer I moved into his dad’s house was tense and awkward—two fourteen-year-old boys whose parents decided we were brothers one day—and I don’t know if it was the arrogance of that age or that we’d both been through it before, but eventually these lines formed.
Wes and me on one side, our parents’ chaos on the other.
It was a chance to forge our own stability, something that might last even if our new family didn’t.
And it did last. Wes and I have never had much in common on the surface, but he’s the only person from the revolving door that was my childhood who kept me after he wasn’t required to.
Part of me wonders if I should agree with him about this just to get a little of that back.
But a stronger part of me wishes it was him who felt that way.
“It’s only October, Wes.” I pick up a pen and spin it between my fingers, feeling agitated and like I need to move. “Lay off.”
“I’d love to lay off, but I don’t wanna is not a business strategy. You’re acting like a child avoiding his homework.”
“Does that make you the teacher? Because I don’t take assignments from you.” I feel myself resorting to cockiness, and I also feel the way it misses like a boxer catching air with his fist.
“No, you just take all your business advice from me so you can sip beer and pour it.”
My teeth grind together. “We each get paid to do what we do.”
“Sure, until we don’t. It’s called job security, Jameson, and it’s important to those of us who think beyond tomorrow. That’s what this offer gets us. That’s what you’re missing with your stubborn refusal to take it seriously.”
Security. You’d think growing up the way I did, bouncing from house to house, a new step family every few years, security would be a white whale, but I just can’t make myself see it that way.
Instead, that security he’s talking about feels like an accusation that I’m in over my head and need to be bailed out.
“I am taking it seriously, Wes. That’s why I sounded so serious when I told you I needed more time.”
“I know this success isn’t something you were prepared for, Jameson, but it’s time to be greedy because there’s no guarantee it will last.”
“Tell that to Sam Adams.”
“When we have Sam Adams money, I’ll stop telling it to you.”
“Is there a third item on this agenda, because I do have to get out to the bar.”
“Actually, there is. I talked to Ronnie today,” he says, and I know immediately where this is going. Damn this tiny little city. “Had to square up for the hops delivery. He said you brought Noel to the farm.”
“And?”
“And you promised she had nothing to do with this, then you bring her to a business meeting.”
I laugh for real this time. “Come on. It was my day off. I go there all the time.”
“I told you we’re not making decisions based on this bullshit fantasy anymore. Fucking hell. Do you even understand the amount of money at stake right now?”
“I know exactly what’s at stake. Look, Noel and I aren’t your concern, and neither is what I do at the farm, or our suppliers. It’s all in my purview.”
“I know you, Jamie.” He crosses his arms over his chest. “You were eventually going to listen to me like you always do. But now you’re digging in even harder, and only one thing has changed.”
Actually, a lot of things have changed. And yeah, I wanted Noel’s help at the start of this, but it’s complicated now.
I meant what I said to her that night on her couch, and the last thing I want is for her to wonder if that’s what I’m thinking about when I’m with her now.
It’s not. But that’s also none of Wes’s business.
Wes takes my lack of response as agreement, and I let him have it. “Don’t forget you have Sugarloaf next weekend for their Fall Fest,” he says as I push out of the chair. “Thousands of people will come through. Make sure you’re prepared.”
I perk up slightly at the reminder. I love these kinds of events, getting to hand out my beer to people and nerd out about hops and spices with them. It beats ties and sales calls any day. Sure as fuck beats these spreadsheets. I knock my fist on his desk and head for the bar. “It’s handled.”
“Do you want anything to drink?” Noel calls up to me from her kitchen.
“I’m good. Just come to bed.” I’m lying on her bed, still in a towel from the post-work shower I convinced her to share with me.
She crests the stairs, her hair pulled up haphazardly, wearing another one of my shirts, and the entire contents of my chest cavity turns to liquid. She’s the most beautiful thing I’ve ever seen.
“It’s so cold,” she says, dancing on her toes.
“Come here and get warm.” She throws a knee over my waist, seating herself in my lap.
I immediately run my hands up her bare thighs, groaning as my fingers disappear beneath the hem of her shirt.
I may not have whatever gift Noel has. I can’t see the future, but here I feel it settle over me like warm water.
Nights downtown. Lazy mornings with her fingers in my hair.
I picture the winter that’s nipping at us, keeping each other warm like this. Waking up with her head on my chest, her leg slung over my waist. Holding her hand under the table at dinner.
I don’t picture her leaving to go back to Connecticut at the end of the year. I don’t even let myself think about it.
“Hey. Where’d you go?” Noel leans forward, slowly pressing her mouth to mine, and I realize I’ve been in my head for more than a polite amount of time.
“Sorry. I’m here.” At the taste of her, I’m sucked right back into the moment.
Her hair falls around us, blocking the light from the lamp on her nightstand, and I deepen the kiss.
Her lips are pink and bee-stung from my stubble but I can’t make myself stop.
“Do you want to come to a thing with me next weekend?”
“Do I have to dress up?”
I snort. “Weird lead off question, but yes, actually. It requires a short dress. Preferably cleavage-bearing.”
She shakes her head. “Fresh.”
“I have to go to Sugarloaf Mountain for a festival. I thought maybe we could stay at the hotel. You could paint while I work if you wanted. The mountain has good views and—”
She presses her fingers to my lips. “Yes.”
“Yeah?”
“Of course I’ll go.”
“Good.” I let out the breath I was holding and sit up to kiss her again. And promptly smack the top of my head on the slanted ceiling. “Shit,” I hiss, falling back onto the pillow. “That’s the third time I’ve done that.”
Noel claps a hand over her mouth. “Are you okay?”
“I don’t know. Better come check.”
She frowns. “You’re too big for my bed.”
“I’ll just stay horizontal. Come sit.”
She quirks an eyebrow, a smile hinting at her lips. “I am sitting.”
“On my face, baby.” I give her hips a tug, and her hand slaps the angled ceiling above my head to keep from tipping over. She giggles but it turns to a moan when I press a kiss between her legs. Soft. Sweet, in case she’s sore from before.
“I thought we were going to bed,” she says. “I’ve been tricked.”
“Do you want me to stop?” I pop my thumb in my mouth, then press it against her, making a slow circle. Her eyes roll back.
“Don’t you dare,” she says, then quieter, “I’m meeting Cara tomorrow morning. About her mural.”
Pride for her distracts me and I stop moving. “Yeah? Are you excited?”
“I don’t know. I haven’t really let myself think about it yet.”
“Why does that not surprise me.”
“What doesn’t surprise you?”
“That you have this amazing opportunity but you’re putting your excitement on ice.” I lift my head and press my tongue flat against her. “Noe. This is awesome. Feel it.”
She mutters a curse under her breath. “Do you always give advice with your head between a woman’s legs?”
“I don’t always do anything.” I swat her ass lightly, then soothe it with a squeeze. “Admit you’re excited.”
She squirms above me, an inch from riding my face, but I hold her just shy of the pressure she wants, that I’m dying to give her.
“It’s just…”
I nudge her with my nose, and she hisses.
“I don’t like to get excited about stuff until—Ah.”
I crane my neck, letting her feel my breath on her skin, but nothing else. “Noel.”
She whines, then laughs. “Okay, fine. It is pretty amazing.”
“It’s fucking awesome. Will you come by the bar after you’re done?”
“Stop teasing me and I’ll do whatever you want.”
I press up and suck hard.
“Okay. Yes. Yes.”
“That’s my girl. Now spread your legs and let me kiss you good night.”