Chapter 14
fourteen
. . .
Ever
Hours morphed into days. The night arrived. The sun rose.
But I didn’t see the Usher or Fenix again.
Food and water were delivered.
The sentry outside recovered. I tried stealing his power again and again, but the bars held. The sentry switched out. Warriors. Always Warriors.
But the bars held.
And with each outburst, my frustration grew, allowing my fear to seep deeper into my bones, until it was as if that was more a part of me than anything else.
Even the moonlight of Aslendrix couldn’t invigorate any hope inside of me.
My body ached. My heart pounded. But I endured.
I clung to what started all of this—Fenix freeing me from my past prison. He doesn’t want me dead. There is a purpose to my being here.
I’m used to waiting. I’m used to being locked away. But in here, it burrows into me and plants doubts I can’t escape from. They haunt my waking moments just as vividly as they invade my nightmares—the snippets of stolen sleep I’m able to grasp before waking again.
Will I ever see Ten again?
Will I ever get back to Lyle?
It’s been four nights. I think.
As footsteps sound, I refuse to open my eyes or acknowledge the relief that blooms in my chest. They have worn me down, and I hate that all it has taken is time.
I’m a Fifth. The very thing people back in Kirrasia are afraid of, yet here, I’m stuck, with so little power, I’m harmless. Maybe that’s what shutting me inside was to teach me. That I needed their training, just like Fenix said.
A hum of recognition stirs my magic and forces my eyes open.
Fenix waits on the other side of the gate.
“I didn’t think you’d be back.”
“Oh, really? My long-lost sister. I wouldn’t ignore you.”
“No, just lock me in a cave and leave me for days.”
“Do you want to leave the cave? There were much nicer accommodations set up for you. But you spoiled that plan.”
“What, by marching off? By your account, that was your idea. Or was it refusing to listen to what you have to say or agreeing to your demands?”
“Oh, don’t worry. I think we’ll be past that after tonight,” he chuckles.
“Tonight? What’s tonight?”
“Ask me. Ask me about our parents, and I’ll tell you.
” His eyes soften as he speaks, and I see the boy, the child behind the monster.
He wants to be a brother, I see it—feel it—in moments.
A glimpse, perhaps. And it’s so tempting.
After having no answers, he’s here, desperate to spill them, finally saving me from the wall of lies I’ve come up against with every question I’ve asked.
But I’m afraid of the truth. I’m afraid that the pieces that he’s told me already are only going to amount to something that I don’t want to hear. Ignorance, at the moment, is the nicer bedfellow than disappointment and heartbreak.
He said that our parents started this war. Micah told me that my parents killed his.
What if the truth I’m looking for is only bad? What if being a Fifth is a curse? A death curse, and Lyle and the Maker and the others were trying to protect me from it?
What if, what if, what if…
They spin around in my head, conspiring against my will, and plot my demise.
“Let me out. Treat me like your sister, and I’ll ask.
” I stare at the ground as I speak, unable to look him in the eye.
I don’t want him to see how much he’s affected me or how close I am to pleading with him to tell me everything, and give me every shred of information that he has about them.
And the biggest question of them all, where are they?
Fenix smiles, as if he’s won the game.
He walks towards the cage door and pulls a key from a hook on the other side. I watch as he methodically slides the heavy metal key into the lock and springs the door open.
“Thank you.” I bolt from the cold place and into the dappled light, breathing in the warmth of the air, hoping it can rid the lingering chill.
“You’re welcome. Would you like some food, something to drink?”
“I don’t want you to take me back to the Usher. Just us.” I hold his gaze, despite wanting to turn away. Fenix might be the strongest and the most dangerous here, but I’m his weak spot. And I will exploit that for every advantage I can.
“We don’t have to talk to him just now, but if you want food and water, we’ll have to go back to my tent. No one will question you if you’re with me.” His voice warms as he reassures me.
I nod, and he heads towards the boulder, back the way I marched us in the first place.
With every step, I take in the surroundings, the trees, and I watch for clues and for knowledge, but there’s nothing, or at least nobody I can see, lying in wait.
I need to be hyper vigilant. They’ve shown just how easy it is to walk into a situation that I’m not in control of.
Voices and general camp noises filter through the trees as we grow closer. Fenix looks at me, sliding glances at me out of the corner of his eye as if I might bolt again. If there’s one thing I’ve learnt, it’s that I need to start building some trust.
I’m here for a reason, and I need to know what his plan is. Plus, he has information I want.
Those two objectives might easily overlap, but they are my goals. Then I can work on escaping and getting back to Kirrasia.
Back to Ten.
Ten.
My mind conjures a picture of him in my head—the first time we met, as I stormed past him in the Great Hall.
The images shift into the time we watched the stars, the waterfall, training…
so many small pieces of time since that first moment, all building, growing like the sands collecting in an hourglass, running down the seconds until I fell. Until he fell.
Thinking of him brings a heat to my body, like the memory is a living thing under my skin, beating inside my chest. And for the longest second, I could be tricked into thinking he was here. With me. The essence of him feels… stronger.
“What’s got you looking like that?”
“None of your business. I thought you said we’d have food?” I cross my arms, wrenched from my reprieve.
He pauses as if making a decision. “Come on.” He leads us away, past the area where we sat and spoke with the Usher.
A path emerges, worn and trodden, until a couple of trees grow so close together, their limbs intertwine, forming a canopy of sorts over canvas swathes, draped together in a tented area, a small fire smouldering outside, the faint smoky scent hovering around as if it’s too lazy to leave on the breeze.
There’s a table and supplies undercover beyond the fire, but Fenix pulls back one of the falls of fabric, offering me a look farther inside his tent. My curiosity piques, and I step forward.
A woven rug and animal skins litter the floor before I see a wooden cot and a mattress in the corner. A small cast-iron burner sits in the middle with a tall chimney leading outside, and forms the centrepiece of the space, even when not lit.
It’s rustic. Modest. And makes me wonder how long he’s been here. If this is what he describes as home—living on his own in here.
A table opposite the bed has parchments and books, and a jug and cups. None of what I saw on the ship. That made me think of him as a Captain. Here…
Fenix picks up the jug and cups and then turns me towards the exit and the log that serves as a bench near the fire.
He pours a cup and offers it to me.
“Thank you.” I take it and sit down. He fetches food and offers me a plate of bread, an apple, and slices of cold meat from his supplies.
We both eat in an awkward silence. The snipes and comments are on pause for a moment, at least.
He wants me to ask questions—questions that will bind us as sibling—so I ask the biggest one first. “Do you know where they are? Our parents?” I take a bite of the meat and rush the rest of the food while Fenix picks at his morsels and takes his time to answer.
“Yes.”
My eyes close at the word, and relief floods me. I keep chewing and think over all the questions I want to rush ahead with now that I know this. But I swallow them down with my bread and think about my objective.
“Are you a Fifth? Like me?” I don’t look at Fenix and keep eating.
“I don’t know. I haven’t had a Transference ceremony. That’s what they call it, right? I might have been born Kirrian, but it’s the Usher and Novandia who have ensured my power. Nothing more.”
“But you said our parents are Fifths,” I check. “Did Kalan tell you that?”
“Yes.”
It hurts to think about all the times he came to visit Lyle. All the times he came into our house and he could have told me, yet he didn’t. Why did he share with Fenix and not me?
“We’ve had very different upbringings.” He sniggers and rubs his chin. “If your little attempts so far are anything to go by, you are lacking in any guidance as to how to use your gift. You should be a match for me by now, but you’re like a child. Will you let the Usher train you? Work with us?”
He might have shared a few details with me, but that doesn’t mean I’m going to work with them. “No.” I hold fast.
Fenix goes silent, and I can sense the glare he’s offering me. “And here I was thinking we were finally getting along.”
“We’ve had one pleasant conversation, where you chose to tell me the truth. I’m not going to just do whatever you demand.” I put my now-empty plate on the ground and turn towards him.
“Final answer?” He’s back to threats already.
“You can’t make me. I’ve told you this already.”
“Fine. Fine. I had hoped it wouldn’t come to this.” He stands and paces back and forth.
A loud whistle rings through the trees and catches Fenix’s attention. He stops and turns to me. “Are you finished?” He smiles.
“Yes. Thank you.” It might be as easy as breathing to fall into an argument with my brother, but that won’t help me. My resolve not to train and not have more answers to the questions I have is already festering inside my gut.
What if that’s the wrong decision? What if the Usher can help me? If he can help me master my magic, maybe I could stop causing Ten pain when we touch.
“We’re done here. Come on.” He starts off towards the main camp.
“Where are we going? I told you I wanted to talk. Just us.”
“We can still talk. But there’s something I want to show you first.”
That sinking feeling rises from my toes and settles in my stomach, churning the food I’ve just gobbled down. It’s been too easy. He’s hiding something. This is a trap. I just don’t know what the trap is.
Until we walk back to the main camp and to the Usher’s tented area.
“I think you might reconsider your last answer.” Fenix moves out of the way to enable me to see the seating area.
Ten and Crimson sit, blindfolded and bound, the Usher sitting opposite them. And Kalan, watching me like a hawk.
“Now, this is the one I expected to come for you. Turns out Micah was right.”