Chapter 48
48
CONNOR
I know this place more than I know myself...
The shape of the hallways. The feel of the walls. The size of every step on the staircase. The way certain bits of the wooden flooring creaks when you step on it, and what precise sound it makes. Where individual pieces of art are on display.
The smell of each room.
I know this place so damn well, and yet I still can’t find Ember in here.
It’s all so very different from what I remember when heavy smoke chokes the hallways and the stench of burning fire fills your nose... it’s so hard to recall those happy childhood memories of playing between these four walls when the heat burns your skin and when you can’t see at all with the lights off.
It’s just like that dream... the one of the motel on fire and I am searching for Ember in the flames. It’s come true.
I’m running through the mansion. I’m panicked.
God, there are so many rooms.
I’m completely ignoring my firefighter training. I’m blinded to all the procedures I should be following. I should be more careful. I shouldn’t be this desperate. I should have a colleague beside me. I shouldn’t be wildly sprinting.
I should be in control.
But I’m very much not in control.
All I’m focused on is Ember.
Where is she?
“Ember?”
I’m calling her name with all the force I can muster. I’m calling it over and over and over.
And no one answers.
Another hallway. More smoke. More flames.
I’m starting to find it harder and harder to breathe. I can feel my body slowing with each step I take.
But still, I push on.
I have to find her.
And then I round a corner.
And I finally see her.
Ember is bent over forward, coughing aggressively from the smoke clouding the hallway.
Oh, God...
She looks up at me as I approach. Her eyes widen at the sight of me.
“Connor?”
Her voice is weak. She stammers over my name.
“Ember.”
“I was... trying to find... the way out... I was... trying to help...”
She tries to step toward me, but she stumbles. She falls. I’m quick to react – bending down to scoop her up in my arms. I carry her full weight and lift her to her feet.
Adrenaline is coursing through my veins – she feels totally weightless in my arms. A new energy comes to me now that I’m holding her. I could carry her to safety all day.
I lean down so my mouth brushes her ear.
“I’m going to get you out of here, Ember. Trust me.”
I lift her up. I hold her body.
And I start to move.
I take her to safety repeating the same words over and over again in her ear.
“Trust me, Ember. Trust me. Trust me. Trust me .”
We make it outside. I traced back my steps through my childhood home to find my way. I make it out of the front door of the mansion with the heat scorching my back but with my arms still carrying the journalist.
Ember wouldn’t have made it out on her own...
She has closed her eyes somewhere along the escape, but I can still feel her heart beating as I hold her. She’s passed out from the smoke.
Fuck.
I immediately rush across the grounds to the nearest paramedic. It turns out to be Jacob from the car crash I witnessed on that remote road outside of town with Eric.
He and I gently bring her inside the waiting ambulance and rest her on the bed.
“Is she going to be okay?” I ask Jacob, my breathing labored and my lungs full of smoke.
Jacob simply looks at me expressionless. Professional.
“We’ll know in a minute,” he says.
I nod at him. I understand.
He needs space for him and the other paramedics to do their required work. I’ve done what I can, and now it’s time for them to take over. I step out of the ambulance and head to the nearest tree. I lean against the bark with all the effort and exhaustion finally catching up to me and I watch on as my childhood home continues to burn.
Parts of it are already crumbling. The roof is collapsing. By the end of the night the mansion is going to be nothing but ash, even despite the best efforts of my team.
My childhood melting away...
I close my eyes and try to make my mind go blank. Everything’s racing. I need peace. I need silence and solitude.
I cast my mind to my cabin in the woods... my secret space hidden from the world...
I end up standing there against the tree for a long while before I’m tapped on the shoulder. I turn around. It’s Jacob.
“She’s a bit shaken and needs some medical attention,” he tells me softly and expertly. “But she’s going to be okay. You did a good job.”
She’ll be okay, and that’s all I need to know.
And now I can finally fall apart.