Chapter 27
It had been three days since Decker walked off the set and out of Poppy’s life, and he was still having a hard time breathing past the painful lump in his chest. It took him less than an hour to figure out he’d made the biggest mistake of his life.
So he went back to the set, but she was gone and no one knew where she was except Kiki, who told him to go fuck himself.
He didn’t even have her phone number, so he’d begged Jack for it so he could call her.
Which he had—eleven times. She hadn’t answered.
Not that he blamed her. He’d been so thrown by the news that the whole show was one big lie that he hadn’t paused to think of how it made her feel.
He’d reacted from a place of hurt and past betrayals, and now he was paying the price.
“I brought you here today to talk about your feelings,” Miles said. He was sitting at the kitchen table with his therapy hat on.
As soon as Brian had learned what had gone down—since the episode had gone live the night he’d walk out on the best thing that had ever happened to him—he’d read Decker the riot act, saying he’d cost them the shot at making something of their dad’s legacy.
And just like Kiki, he’d told Brian to fuck off.
Which was what had brought them here today, gathered around the kitchen table like some kind of couple’s therapy session.
“I’ve already talked about my feelings,” Brian said. “It’s his turn to talk.”
“Then give me the goddamned talking stick,” Decker said. “I mean, if you would shut up for a minute and stopped hogging the stick, we’d get somewhere.”
“The stick is supposed to deescalate the tension so that everyone feels heard,” Miles reminded them, taking the stick and handing it over to Decker. “So Decker, you’re holding this stick, why don’t you tell us how you feel?”
“Well, I’m pissed off. Yeah, I’m pissed off. Period.”
“That’s not a productive emotion. Why don’t we try for something more productive? And can you be more specific on what is triggering you?”
“Okay, I’m pissed off at my brother,” Decker said.
“Still not the best word, but we can work with that. Why are you pissed off?”
“Because I feel neglected and taken advantage of, and whatever it was that you said before.”
“That was a good description,” Miles said with a serene smile. “About how he feels taken advantage of.”
“You feel taken advantage of?” Brian snapped.
“I have the stick,” Decker said.
Brian reached over and yanked the stick out of Decker’s hands. “You feel taken advantage of? I cooked dinner last night, and you didn’t even do the dishes. You left the kitchen a complete shit show, and I had to clean it up before I went to work.”
“You invited me to dinner. I was a guest.”
“And what do we do when we have these kind of feelings?” Miles asked.
“Put this stick to good use and beat the shit out of each other?” Brian said.
“Again, not productive.” Miles grabbed the stick and handed it back to Decker. “Would you like to try?”
“Beating the shit out of him? Sure.”
“Acknowledging what Brian said.”
“I’m sorry if your pansy-ass feelings got hurt, but I was also working hard.”
Miles sighed, which Decker guessed they deserved. They were acting like they were teenagers all over again. But Decker was tired and hurting and the last thing he wanted to do was talk about his feelings.
“That’s derogatory. Let’s try another word.”
“Sorry you got your panties in a wad.”
Miles grabbed the stick. “Why don’t we try this from another angle? Let’s get directly to the point.”
“Fine,” Decker said, holding his hand out, and Miles gave him the stick. “I’m willing to appear in ten episodes of the show decorating the houses and doing the finishing touches. We can move forward as long as you guys understand that that’s all I have to offer.”
Brian grabbed the stick. “The producers aren’t going to go for that. They want twenty-four episodes. It’s all or nothing.”
“Why can’t it be a compromise?” Decker asked, ignoring that he didn’t have the stick. “It’s always all or nothing for you.”
“Because the only choice I have is all or nothing. Do you know how hard it was to pick up where Dad left off? I didn’t have a choice to do it half-assed. I had to go all in.”
“And so did I. We both chose different paths, but ‘chose’ is the key word,” Decker said, remembering what Poppy had told him the other night.
At the reminder, his stomach bottomed out. Because he’d made a choice, too—to walk away. And right now he needed to make sure that whatever decision he came to with his family would be the right one for him.
“I didn’t leave you behind,” Decker said quietly.
“I left to follow my dream and I’m sorry if that stopped you from following yours.
But building was you and Dad’s thing. You chose to take over the company to hold on to the memories.
Hockey was my thing with Dad, so that’s how I honored his sacrifice.
It doesn’t mean I left you behind, and I’m sorry if I made you feel like I did. ”
For the first time since Decker started working with Brian again, he could see a glimpse of the big brother he’d always looked up to.
And it broke Decker’s heart that all this time they could have been making memories, leaning on each other for support.
Instead, they’d been drifting further and further away over a misunderstanding of where the other person’s feelings lay.
All it would have taken was for Decker to reach out, and all of this could have been avoided.
Just like with Poppy. If he’d just stopped instead of reacting, she’d still be in his life. But instead, he’d chosen pride over family. Because that’s what she was to him—family.
“Jesus,” he said, resting his head in his hands. “I blew it.”
Brian lifted a brow. “Are we still talking about us or about Poppy?”
“I just walked away from her after I told her I loved her and would fight for her. What kind of man does that?”
“A man who is in love and scared of the past repeating itself,” Miles said. “Can you allow for the possibility that she’s different?”
No hesitation, he said, “She is. I’m such an idiot.”
“You are,” Brian said. “But she’ll get over it. We all have.”
“Then what do I do?”
“Go all in. No compromises.”