Chapter 17
‘H ey Dad!’ Rosie trilled as she quickly made tea the next morning.
After the kiss (or should that be kisses) she and Max had shared the night before, which had swept her off her feet, she was still walking on air.
Following the moonlit boat ride, she and Max had cuddled and canoodled, walking back to their boats hand in hand.
She’d wanted him to invite her in, and had toyed with the idea of asking herself when the words she’d longed for hadn’t been forthcoming.
But something inside her had held back. Max was only just opening up, laughing and relaxing, enjoying himself again, and somehow, she just knew that she was better off taking things slow, going at his pace, giving him space.
The realisation of how she’d been holding a piece of herself back for years had rocked her too and she needed time to get h er head around that before she threw herself headlong into something else.
Even though the ache in her heart, and in other places, pleaded otherwise, she ignored it.
Whatever jealousy she’d felt over his ex, Johanna, had left and Max had clearly felt it was time to move on too.
‘You sound very chipper this morning,’ her dad said, and she did her best to control the smile on her face reflecting too much in her voice.
‘I am. I’m in Amsterdam, things are going well at work and I’m happy. That’s good, isn’t it?’
‘Amazing. I’m very proud of you.’
‘Thanks, Dad. So what’s the call for? Just checking in or is something going on?’
In the background she heard her dad’s old kettle click to a stop. ‘Just a check-in. I wanted to make sure you were all right. Melody told me about the guy at work who was being horrible.’
‘Yeah, but I think that might be sorted now too.’ At least she hoped so. They’d ended on such a positive note the day before, she couldn’t imagine him going back to being moody and stand-offish, though nothing was impossible. She’d find out today.
‘Well, I guess I’ll leave you to it.’ There was a note of sadness in her dad’s voice and she realised that with everything that had been going on, she’d been neglecting to call as regularly as she should.
‘Why don’t I call you again tonight, Dad? We can have a video chat over dinner, and it’ll be just like old times.’
He immediately brightened. ‘Yes, let’s do that. We should cook the same thing too.’
That was a lovely idea. ‘Okay, what do you fancy?’
‘How about your mum’s salmon and new potatoes? That was always your favourite growing up.’
It had been and she still cooked it for herself when she was feeling low. It was her go-to comfort meal. ‘Brilliant. I’ll make sure to get some on the way home.’
Rosie bid her dad goodbye and finished getting ready. As she stepped outside, she was glad to see Max already up and about. He came to her as she stepped off the dock, placing a gentle kiss on her cheek.
‘Hi,’ he said sweetly. ‘Off to the market?’
‘Yeah. You? You’re up and about early.’
‘I’ve got a meeting at a gallery at nine. It’s a new place opening up in De Pijp.’
‘Is that why you were there the other day?’
He nodded. ‘I don’t know if they’ll want my work but—’
‘Of course they will. They’d be stupid not to.’
‘Thank you.’ He bent his head and gave her a gentle kiss on the lips. As warmth flooded through her, along with need and longing, she threw her arms around his neck. Eventually, they pulled away from each other and she stepped back, feeling light-headed.
‘Did you want to have dinner tonight?’ Max asked.
‘Yes! No! I’d love to, but– I’m sorry, I can’t. I’m having dinner with my dad, over video chat. I think he’s missing me.’
Guilt suddenly washed through her. With their mum gone and Melody working long shifts at the hospital, they’d often seen each other more than most fathers and daughters.
She should have been making more time for him rather than just using him as a sounding board when she needed a pick-me-up.
She swallowed, summoning up some positivity.
She couldn’t change the past, but she could definitely change the future.
From now on, she’d make more time for her dad.
Maybe schedule in a weekly meal like they were having tonight?
That was a good idea, and she’d suggest it this evening.
Any disappointment Max had felt vanished in an instant, to be replaced by something like pride. ‘You should definitely see him. You can always pop over for a drink when you’ve finished.’
‘I might just do that. Okay. I’ll see you later.’ She extracted herself from Max’s arms, which had stayed around her waist, and reluctantly started her walk to the flower market. ‘Good luck with the gallery!’
Her day at the flower market was one of the busiest she’d ever had.
She hardly saw Emma, who was also rushed off her feet, and Rosie was sure that part of her unusual number of customers came from Finn, who she caught once or twice pointing people in her direction, urging them to listen to her talks on bergamot and sage.
She gave him a grateful smile at the end of the day as she left for home, ready to pick up her ingredients.
As Rosie wrapped the salmon in paper and popped it into the oven, before adding new potatoes to a pan of boiling water, she could have been back at home in the family kitchen.
She sliced sweet cherry tomatoes onto a plate, and her thoughts ran to her mum and how proud she would be of her.
It was something her dad had said often, but as she’d drifted from job to job, never really sticking at anything, the words had felt hollow.
Not because of anything her dad had done, but because they simply hadn’t rung true to Rosie herself. Now she was earning them.
When her dad’s cheerful face popped up on the screen, Rosie could feel the love across the miles between them. ‘Look!’ he said, turning the camera to show he’d set the small family table, complete with a napkin and glass of wine. Rosie burst out laughing, turning her own phone around.
‘Great minds think alike!’ She’d set her own place, laid a tablecloth over the tiny table and added a bright blue placemat.
There was also a glass of crisp white wine waiting.
Seeing the smile on her dad’s face sent a lump into her throat and threatened another wave of guilt to ready itself, but she pushed the negative feelings away.
‘I just need to get mine out of the oven.’
‘Me too.’
When her dad’s face next appeared as they set their plates on the table three hundred and fifty miles apart, his glasses were steamed up from the oven and he had to tip his head to see her.
‘You look like you’re about to tell me off,’ she teased. ‘You always used to tip your head like that when I’d done something wrong and you wanted to scare me.’
‘It worked, though, didn’t it?’
‘Sometimes.’ She cut into the salmon, the smells triggering memories of home and noisy dinners together. ‘So tell me about your day.’
Her dad went through the trials and tribulations of his work, and they chatted about his colleagues and hers.
She mentioned Finn’s changed attitude and that the atmosphere at the flower market was now much more relaxed.
The boost to her daily profits was, she hoped, a sign of things to come.
Her dad updated her on Melody’s long, tiring hours at the hospital, the stresses and strains she was under working for the NHS, and how he wanted her to get a bit more of a life, so she wasn’t working all the time.
Rosie didn’t ask if her sister had asked the doctor out yet.
That was a purely sisterly conversation, and Melody would not be impressed if she let it slip to their dad.
By the time they’d finished eating and talked through the washing-up over another glass of wine, it felt like they’d spent the evening together in the same room, within touching distance. She longed to give her dad a hug and told him so.
‘Me too, sweetheart, but this has been fun.’
‘It has. We should do this once a week.’
‘It’s a date.’
‘I’ll text you tomorrow, okay?’ Though she normally texted good morning and goodnight, it was another thing she’d let slip recently and she resolved to start again.
They said their goodbyes and she headed outside into the cool evening air.
Now the storm had passed, the weather was heating up again and though the sun was setting slowly in the sky, the air remained warm.
Max was out on his deck, working on his sketch while Zoon barked at the passing ducks. He looked up as she stepped out.
‘How did it go at the gallery?’ she asked.
‘Good, I think. They like what I do, and I think I’ve scored you a job too.’
‘Me? How?’
He gestured to the empty seat beside him before pulling it closer. Wine glass in hand, she sat down, and his arm snaked around her shoulder. ‘They’re looking for some floral displays for the gallery opening and I recommended you.’
‘Me? Why?’
‘Don’t sound so surprised.’ He chuckled. ‘Why wouldn’t I recommend you? I wasn’t about to suggest Finn.’
‘But... what do they want? I mean, what type of thing are they looking for? Big? Small? Ab—’
‘If you say “abstracty” I’m taking that wine away.’ She pulled her glass close to her body and protected it with her other hand. ‘You’ll have to go and see them to find out. Here’s the guy’s card. He said he’d be around till mid-morning.’
‘Okay, I’ll nip by first thing. Thank you. That was kind of you.’ Max’s soft gaze made her tip her head up and plant a kiss on his lips.
‘He’ll be blown away, I’m sure.’
‘And I’m sure he’ll want your work too.’
‘Let’s hope.’ He raised his glass in a toast.
In the short-term relationships she’d had, nothing had felt so natural as being with Max.
Some of the guys she’d seen hadn’t shown this level of affection even after four or five dates, except in the bedroom.
Yet Max was happy to hold her hand, kiss her forehead and put his arm around her.
It had only been a day, she reminded herself, but what she was experiencing now fitted so well with the flashes of the real Max she’d seen since she’d arrived, and she wondered how Johanna had ever let him go.
Money wasn’t everything. There had been times when her parents hadn’t had any money, but they’d had each other, and that had been all that mattered.
Once you found someone you loved, you couldn’t let them go.
She knew only too well how life could be cut short.
‘You’re being quiet again,’ Max said, breaking into her thoughts. ‘I don’t like it.’
A cover of coots passed by, their little black heads peering at everything around them. Zoon had gone to his bed but lifted his head before deciding to ignore them.
‘I was just thinking about my parents and how much they loved each other. When you find the right person, you can’t afford to let them go.’
Realising this may have been too much too soon, Rosie froze, expecting a heavy, difficult silence to follow, but Max’s body language remained the same.
‘I agree,’ he said softly, pressing a gentle kiss to the top of her head.
As she snuggled into his shoulder, they watched the sun go down. When the velvety night encircled them, bright stars began to shine overhead, and a slight breeze picked up. It wasn’t cold, but she could feel a slight chill on her skin.
‘I’d better go to bed,’ she said, standing.
Still holding her hand, Max followed. He pulled her close and kissed her passionately, his fingers threading into her short hair and cupping the back of her head.
She savoured the feel of his lips on hers, and the soft brush of his beard.
He tasted of the wine they’d been drinking.
When his right hand fell to the curve of her waist, drawing her even nearer to him so their bodies were pressed together, every nerve ignited.
‘You could go to bed here,’ he said gruffly, and Rosie didn’t need words to respond.
The passion of her kiss was enough. He led her inside and as the night unfolded, their bodies intertwining, it was clear Max was falling in love with her as much as she was falling for him.
Whoever Johanna had been, she was well and truly forgotten.
It was now just them and the future that lay at their feet.