Chapter 20
Alexander
“I’m Sorry, Evelyn.”
She doesn’t reply. She doesn’t move. Doesn’t ask questions. Just holds me. And I don’t remember the last time someone touched me without wanting something in return.
The warmth of her body, the softness of her hands on my back—it undoes me in a way sex never could. My voice is quiet when I speak. Almost foreign to my own ears. “My mother left when I was eight.”
She stiffens just slightly—but she doesn’t pull away. Her hands rub gentle, slow circles over my shirt. “She just… packed a bag and left. No note. No goodbye. Just gone.” I swallow hard. “She never looked back.” The words feel like glass in my throat.
“My father raised us—or tried to. He didn’t hit.
That would’ve required effort. He preferred.
.. silence. Emotional starvation. Love was earned, if at all.
Based on numbers. Achievements. Image.” Her fingers freeze for just a second, then move again.
“That’s where the rules came from. The control.
Discipline. I built an empire out of what he left behind.
I thought… if I had enough power, I wouldn’t feel it anymore. ”
I laugh bitterly, softly. “I was wrong.” I feel her arms tighten around me, like she’s afraid I’ll vanish if she lets go. “I did fall in love once,” I whisper. “Her name was Grace.”
No reaction. She listens. She lets me.
“She was beautiful. Smart. The kind of woman who could set a room on fire with a look. And for a while… she made me believe I could be something else. Something softer.”
My grip on the glass tightens before I continue.
“She had me mugged.”
I hear her breath hitch. But still—she stays.
“I got shot. In the stomach. She wanted my wallet. My black card. Whatever was in it. She planned the whole thing. Left me bleeding in the street like I was nothing.” My voice drops to a rasp.
“She didn’t even visit me in the hospital.”
And finally, I look up at Evelyn. Her eyes are wide.
Wet. But not from pity. From understanding.
“I swore off love after that. Off women who said pretty things and touched me like they meant it.” I exhale, shaky.
“But then you happened. And now every rule I built to survive is cracking under your silence.”
I don’t ask her to say anything. I just lean forward, resting my forehead against hers. “I don’t know how to do this,” I whisper. “But I can’t pretend I don’t want to try. Even if even want.”