Chapter twenty
just breathe
S tanding in a doorway that was taller than my entire building back home, I squinted into the great hall. I gave Bowyn a wary glance. This couldn’t possibly be the same ball he’d so joyously described. Sparse candles provided little light; they barely illuminated the carved stone pillars running the length of the great hall. All around, ladies dressed in glittering ebony gowns slunk around tables laden with food that looked as inedible as it smelled. The only noise came from the whispers of those brave enough to disturb the silence.
This room felt sick.
As if everything inside died long ago, and rot and decay had taken hold.
This was a ball for corpses.
Bowyn jutted his chin to the far end of the hall. “The Queen.” The only individual seated, the Queen’s presence imposed on the room like a loaded gun. Her dress wasn’t made of light at all, but the absence of it. Darkness clung to her sickly, gaunt body, and charcoal make-up smeared her eyes.
“How old is she?” I whispered.
“Fifty-six.”
“No!” My jaw dropped. “Fifty-six!?” I couldn’t believe it. If Bowyn told me she was one-hundred-and-fifty-six, I still might not have believed him. From back here, I wasn’t even sure she was alive. Behind the Queen, stood a stunning ghost of a girl. Elwyn, the one we’d met in town. White light mimicked delicate folds of lace against her skin. She shone like a pearl in the dark hall. Her shoulders rose and fell as she sighed, staring longingly into the crowd of people. A sweet-looking, baby-faced man stood beside her, uncomfortably close.
“The woman to the Queen’s right. That’s the Truth. The Queen’s spy.” Looking like the offspring of a witch and a clown, the Truth wore garish colours and a gigantic pointy hat. “Stay away from her at all costs.” Bowyn peered around. “I wonder where the Cage is. Terrifying creature, the Cage. I suppose it’s hidden out of sight, trying not to make everyone too uneasy.”
I imagined a ghastly monster named the Cage would be right at home here.
My eyes adjusted to the dark, then my breath caught. Darragh leaned against the wall, several steps behind the Queen’s throne. He hadn’t dressed for the occasion. His clothes were regular, black fabric. He blended into the shadows, keen to remain hidden in the background. Arms crossed, Darragh stared at the ground.
Bowyn stepped into the great hall, but I resisted. “Bowyn, I don’t know about this.”
Dragging me after him, Bowyn whispered, “Have courage, my love.” I glowed like a beacon in the dark, and one by one, people faced us. Whispers rose as we joined the crowd.
“Who is she?”
“Look at her dress.”
“He’s a serpent, that one.”
“I’ve never seen her before.”
Darragh looked up, curious about the commotion. We made eye contact and my heart stopped.
Just breathe .
Darragh’s lips parted, and his arms fell to his sides. His eyes travelled from my face to my feet, and back. I wondered if he was reminding himself to breathe too.
The briefest of smiles crossed my lips.
Darragh’s eyes darted to the Queen. They widened and shot back to me before settling on Bowyn. There were no words exchanged between the two, but I imagine the silent conversation went something like:
Your death will be slow .
I look forward to it, darling. Isn’t she beautiful?
“Let us promenade, Belle.” Bowyn paraded me around, ever the proud mother. Surrounded by all the ladies in raven and ebony gowns, Bowyn and I were candles in a sea of darkness.
“I don’t think I understood the assignment,” I whispered to Bowyn.
“You understood it better than anyone else—”
“What are you doing here?” Darragh snapped. He’d crept through the shadows and appeared unnoticed.
Bowyn scrunched his face, as if the answer were terribly obvious. “We’re enjoying the ball.”
“No.” Darragh grabbed Bowyn’s wrist and twisted it behind his back.
“Ow! Come now, that’s my dodgy arm! What are you—”
Darragh shoved Bowyn toward the door. “You’re leaving. Right now. Take her and go.”
Her?
“ Excuse me ,” I said .
“Why don’t you and Belle—sorry, Eleanor—have a dance?” Bowyn beamed. I glanced hopefully at Darragh, who looked like his head might explode.
“No,” he growled.
My hopes melted away.
“Suit yourself,” Bowyn said, and stuck up his chin. People around us stared, and Darragh reluctantly released his friend. Darragh’s hand flexed at his side, and a small flame sputtered to life.
“Ah, ah.” Bowyn’s eyes darted to the Queen. Darragh scowled in silent fury, but the flame died. Without acknowledging me, Darragh left and resumed his spot on the wall. He rubbed his jaw and glanced at the Queen.
“He wouldn’t even look at me,” I said, more piteously than I meant to.
Bowyn brought a finger to rest under my chin. “Let’s give him something to look at.”
Across the room, Darragh watched Elwyn, his gaze focused where the baby-faced man’s hand rested on her arm. Jealousy warmed my cheeks. “How do we do that?”
“We dance.”
I fidgeted, looking around the room. “There’s no music.”
“Listen, my love.”
“I don’t hear anything—” Slowly, a melody rose. “Are you doing that?” Bowyn backed away, beckoning me with his finger. I couldn’t resist.
My hand found Bowyn’s and we embraced. Pressed against him, I was stiffly reminded we were naked. Intoxicating warmth pushed away any thoughts or feelings of worry. All around, people stared as we danced. On any other occasion, I’d have called this a nightmare, but today, I was beautiful. Rather than shrink away, I let them look. In Bowyn’s arms, I couldn’t help but laugh and smile. Bowyn twirled and lunged sideways, dipping me low. Slowly, he pulled me back up to him. His warm breath brushed my skin as his lips travelled up my neck, where they nearly met mine—
THUNK !
“Oof!” I slammed into the stone floor. My dress flickered, and for one terrifying moment, I thought I’d lose it. Bowyn rubbed his temple, where a ruby red line of blood trickled. Curiously, it wasn’t a look of pain on Bowyn’s face…it was satisfaction. He smirked and rubbed the blood between his fingers. The goblet that struck him rolled noisily back and forth on the cobbled floor. Everyone stared at us now, mouths agape.
Across the room, Darragh buried his head in his hands, as if he’d just made a dreadful mistake. In my peripheral, I glimpsed the Queen.
My blood chilled.
Her large, owl-like eyes burned into me. The Queen stood and a gentle murmur rose from the crowd. The Queen raised a frail arm and pointed a bony finger at me. A voice in my head whispered, ‘ Approach.’
“Agh!” Tiny tents of skin littered my arms as hundreds of invisible hooks yanked me up and pulled me toward the Queen. I scanned the crowd for Bowyn.
Gone.
An unbearable silence fell upon the great hall. This was the nightmare I’d feared. The voice in my head spoke again, ‘ Who are you ?’ I tried to wipe my mind. The familiar rain drop sensation dribbled on my scalp. It built until a downpour pounded my skull and white stars speckled my vision. I closed my eyes and gripped my head. Inside my skull, the Queen sifted and prodded, searching. Through the hammering, the voice said, ‘ What are you?’
Don’t think too loud , I screamed the reminder to myself. Darragh had told me that.
Darragh.
The Queen gasped and recoiled. I cracked my eyes and—
“Oof!” Darragh doubled over and clutched his stomach. An unseen hand grabbed the front of his shirt. It dragged Darragh before the Queen, where he fell at her feet.
“What is your relation to this strange young woman?” the Queen hissed. Elwyn, who’d hardly given me a second glance in town, looked like she might scratch my eyes out now.
“I’ve never seen her before,” Darragh said.
He refused to look at me.
The Queen whispered to the woman sitting beside her, the one Bowyn called the Truth. The Truth grinned and pushed a sleeve to her elbow. She raised her hand.
Darragh climbed to his feet and leapt in front of me. An invisible force struck him and he dropped. “Aughhh!” Darragh writhed. His back twisted, as if wrung like a wet towel.
The Queen smirked. “I thought as much.” Elwyn covered her mouth, petrified eyes locked on Darragh. “Take him to the Cage,” the Queen instructed. The Truth waved at Darragh, who climbed shakily to his feet. Unable to stand straight, his hands gripped his midsection.
“No!” Darragh resisted.
“Silence.” The Queen snapped her fingers and Darragh’s mouth clamped shut. He fought every step, but gradually, he followed the Truth.
The Queen’s wide, unblinking eyes surveyed me. So much scarier up close, she smelled of decay—like rotting meat and sweet, putrid fruit. “Well, well, well. There’s something different about you, isn’t there?”
‘I know where you’ve come from,’ the Queen’s voice whispered in my head. ‘ You can’t hide it from me.’ Too frightened to say anything, I stared at the ground. The Queen cocked her head and said, “I’m not going to kill you.”
Based on her tone, I didn’t believe that for a second.
She may not kill me…yet.
“I’m going to make you a deal,” the Queen said. A painful silence stretched on; the Queen relished the fear. “West of here, there’s a burrow—”
A hiss of whispers rose from those gathered. The Queen’s eyes darted about the room, hushing the crowd. She continued. “Inside the burrow is something I desire—a necklace, which I carelessly lost during my last visit. I have sent many individuals to retrieve it, each time I have been eternally disappointed. Perhaps a person of your… upbringing can acquire it.” The Queen stifled a smirk, suggesting she believed quite the opposite. “You, and only you, will go into the burrow and get my necklace. If you bring it back, you may leave.”
“And Darragh?”
A whisper went through the crowd. Elwyn’s hands balled into fists and the Queen snarled, “What about him?”
“If…” I gulped, my mouth drier than ever before. “If I bring it back, I want you to free Darragh.”
The candles flickered.
A monster with charred eyes and snarling fangs replaced the Queen.
The illusion was over before it started.
“Of course.” The Queen smiled. “If you return my necklace, you, and Darragh, will be released.”
“Death is a release,” my voice quivered. “I want both of us alive when we leave here.”
A laugh sputtered from the Queen’s decrepit lips. “My goodness, you’re a clever thing, aren’t you?” She waved. “Fine, retrieve my necklace, and you and Darragh may leave here…alive. ”
The deal felt wrong—tricksy, like a genie with messed up wishes. My eyes darted between Elwyn and the Queen, both of whom looked ready to eat me alive, if given the chance.
What other choice did I have?
The Queen examined a frail, greying fingernail. Without looking at me, she said, “Do we have a deal?”
“Yes.”
“Very well. Escort her out.”
I glanced down, surprised to see my dress still shimmering. I’d been so distracted, I thought surely, I’d be naked. A tiny girl, no more than ten, took my hand.
“Best of luck,” the Queen’s haunting voice called.
Unable to bear all the gawking faces, I watched my feet as we left.
Once out of earshot of the great hall, the young girl introduced herself. “My name’s Hazel. What’s yours?”
“Nell.”
“I like your dress.”
“Thanks. It has pockets.”
Hazel looked a little confused but smiled anyway.
“Where are we going?”
“I’m going to leave you with the Cage while I get a few things for your trip.” My stomach tightened. What had Bowyn called the Cage? A terrifying creature? We walked deeper and deeper into the mountain. I pictured a dank, wet holding cell full of cockroaches and rats. Or worse, people. Hazel paused, and we doubled back down a hallway. “Where is it?” she muttered, while her tiny fingers wrung a stray curl. “I can’t go back and ask.”
Obviously lost, Hazel chewed her thumb and looked like she might cry. I pointed down a side path and said, “We haven’t tried that way yet.”
“Oh!” Hazel took off. “Yes!” We came to a wide, dark opening. Hazel looked down the stairs and stammered, “I—I’ve brought you someone!” A carpet of fog oozed up the steps, and a noise, more akin to the rattling of chains than vocal cords, wafted from below.
“Send them.”
“You”—Hazel pointed—“down there.” She was already sprinting away as she called, “I’ll join you once I’ve gathered your things!”
Swirling mist surrounded me as I descended into darkness. I placed my foot on the next stair—there wasn’t one. My stomach lurched and my arms flailed as I fell. Before I could scream, my feet connected with soft ground. I blinked, adjusting to the dim light. The surrounding mist dispersed, and I realized I wasn’t in the mountain anymore. A creamy white moon illuminated a flat, grassy plain. As far as I could see, knee high grass swayed in the breeze. A figure stood in the distance, his back to me.
“Darragh?”
Turning to my voice, Darragh gave me a weak smile. He waded through the tall grass and stopped several feet away. Darragh gestured to the ground between us. A thin line glowed at his boots, surrounding him in a wide circle. “My feet can’t cross the line,” Darragh whispered. I crept closer so I could hear him, careful not to step over the line.
“Where are we?” I asked.
“The Cage has us.”
The breeze rustled the grass, a rhythmic, peaceful sound. “This isn’t what I pictured at all.”
“You and I both,” Darragh agreed.
The moonlight bathed Darragh in a soft, welcoming glow. With the wind rustling between us, and my dress still alight, I couldn’t help but think, had our circumstances been a little less dire, this might have been a perfect moment.
“I owe you a dance.” Darragh’s voice was wistful, filled with regret. “ And an apology.” Anxiously spinning a single ring around his finger, Darragh inched closer, toeing the line. “I couldn’t say this before, but…” Darragh coughed, cleared his throat, and continued with some difficulty. “You’re breathtaking, and you were so happy. The way you looked with Bowyn…” Darragh’s eyes travelled along the folds of my dress. He reached out to touch me, thought better of it, and dropped his hand. “I wished it was me beside you.”
Unsure what to say, I blushed and looked at my feet. The dress sparkled, a lantern in the night. “Oh, uh, yes, the dress is lovely, isn’t it? I couldn’t have done it without Bo.”
“Bo?” Darragh placed an upward inflection on the word, lacing it with suspicion.
“Bowyn, sorry.”
Darragh took a deep breath and his nose scrunched. His brows rose, and he crossed his arms over his chest.
“What?” I asked.
Oh.
Bowyn’s perfume. Before we left the cottage, Bowyn had practically doused me in it. And at the ball, while we danced, Bowyn’s lips nearly met mine…
I suddenly felt very foolish.
Darragh’s jaw set. He looked at the ground and said, “Beau means boyfriend on Earth, no?”
“What? No! I mean, I don’t know, maybe.” I shook my head, clearing it. “It’s just a nickname! I’m stupid. I shouldn’t have trusted him.” I pointed to my temple. “Read my mind. Nothing happened between us.”
Darragh didn’t answer, but the sharp lines on his face softened. He relaxed and his arms fell to his sides. “You’re not stupid. Bowyn just…” Darragh shrugged. “He has his agenda, and he has a way with people. You can’t always trust him.”
“Yes, well, I won’t be making that mistake again…again.”
Bowyn brought me here on purpose. He wanted the Queen to discover me. He’d wanted me gone the moment he’d met me. “ She doesn’t belong here! ” he’d bellowed. I felt a pang of betrayal. “I told you he wanted me dead,” I moped.
Darragh shook his head. “He doesn’t want you dead. Back on Earth? Probably. Dead? No. I think this all went much further than he intended.” Darragh sighed. “Anyway, he’ll get his wish. You’re going home.”
“No. I’m not.”
“Nell.” Darragh tilted his head. “It’s time to go. Bo will get you home.”
“He seems to have disappeared,” I replied bitterly.
Darragh eyed my dress. “He’s around here somewhere.”
“If I run—if I go home now—the Queen will kill you.”
“It’s not ideal, no,” Darragh said, with a scoff. “Even if you succeed, she’ll kill us both. I’m not getting out of this alive.” He gave me a reassuring smile. “If this is the end for me, I’m glad I could see you this way.”
“Maybe, maybe I can get her necklace?”
“No. You’re not going in that burrow,” Darragh said. “You will die.”
“I might die,” I corrected. “But you will die if I don’t try.”
“Nell, please.” Darragh closed his eyes and pinched the bridge of his nose. With great difficulty, he remained calm. “For once, do what’s best for you. You find Bowyn, and you run.”
“I’m not abandoning you here—”
“Forget me and go home! ”
Darragh’s shout exploded like a clap of thunder, shattering the serene plain. The gentle rustle of swaying grass vanished, eclipsed by Darragh’s furious breathing.
My pounding heart rose to meet him .
“Why do you get to decide what’s best for me?” I snapped. “Have you considered how letting you be executed would make me feel? ” I tapped my chest. “I can barely sleep at night as it is. If I run, I have your death weighing on my conscience forever!”
“Why are you so willing to throw your life away?” Darragh shouted.
“I think it’s time to go,” Hazel called. So preoccupied with Darragh, I hadn’t heard her enter.
Darragh’s panicked eyes searched mine. “What can I do to convince you? Do you want me to beg? Get down on my knees? Anything, I’ll do anything—”
“Live!” I shouted.
Darragh’s mouth clamped shut, but his chest heaved. I stuck my nose up and whispered, “I’ll be back in a few days.” I turned away, but Darragh caught my wrist. Careful not to draw my feet over the line, Darragh yanked me to his chest. I sucked in a breath as his lips pressed against mine. Darragh released me and I stumbled back.
I stood still, shocked.
I’d spent a fair amount of time wondering what it might be like to kiss Darragh. He’d kissed me with such fervor, it made my knees weak…but there was no joy in it. No pleasure. It was desperate, and so hurried I barely knew what was happening until it was over.
The wind rustled the grasses.
A painful knot formed in my stomach.
“Hey!” Hazel sent a pulse of energy at Darragh. It struck him in the chest, and he flew across the plain. Hazel stalked forward; hands raised.
I opened my hand. During our kiss, Darragh pressed several trinkets into my palm. They crackled with warm, fiery energy. When Darragh imbued the bird necklace for me, he’d smiled bashfully and said, “ It’s quite painful .” I counted the talismans in my hand.
There were seven.
One was a silver pendant, shaped like a sunflower. Then two earrings, a seed Darragh must have had in his pocket, and three rings. I slipped a ring on my finger.
“What was that?” Hazel snapped.
Shoving my hand behind my back, I said, “What was what?”
Hazel made a grabbing motion, as if I were a puppy with forbidden food in my mouth. “What do you have?” Darragh threw himself at the edge of the foot trap. The moment his feet crossed the line, he bounced across the plain again. “You’re just hurting yourself, you idiot!” Hazel shouted. Darragh leapt to his feet. He wiped a dribble of blood from the corner of his mouth and readied to try again.
The soothing whisper of rustling grass ceased. Hazel’s shoulders hunched and she cried, “Now look what you’ve done!” The moonlight dimmed, and a wisp of smoke curled around our feet. Hazel whimpered and the hair on my arms prickled.
A voice resonated all around. It rattled, “You’re dismissed.” Hazel’s head whipped from side to side as she searched for the source. She scanned the plain and turned in a small circle, trying to decide which direction to turn her back on. I blinked.
Hazel disappeared.
“Nell,” Darragh beckoned urgently, “come to me.” I hurried over. Our toes pressed against our respective sides of the thin, glowing line. A noise crept up from behind, like bits of metal struck upon each other. Darragh offered a brief, reassuring smile, and whispered, “Have courage.”
The deafening clanking of chains filled the plain.
We turned to greet whoever approached, and I craned my neck to see them. Cloaked in black, a hooded figure stood so tall, it blocked the moonlight. The thing hunched, its back and neck curved like a scythe as it stalked forward. Each step was disjointed, and accompanied by loud cracks, as if the bones were never meant to bend that way. My legs trembled as the figure slunk closer. I looked to Darragh for reassurance. The softness was gone. A muscle twitched in his jaw, and a deadly focus set in his keen eyes. Darragh’s magic might be chained, but a fire burned within.
“I will incinerate you where you stand,” Darragh warned, stepping forward.
Darragh threatening this bone-chilling monster, who was at least twice his size, struck me as silly. That thought, coupled with feeling impossibly frightened, forced an awkward chuckle from my throat.
Darragh glared over his shoulder, eyes wide. The figure craned its long neck, turning its gaze from Darragh to me. There was no face beneath the hooded cloak, only darkness. An unending sense of dread washed through me as I looked upon the emptiness. I couldn’t find the strength to look away. In that moment, I was alone, and I was sure I would die—
“Look at me!” Darragh snapped his fingers, bringing the attention back to him. Released from the spell, I wiped a tear from my cheek. Determined not to look at the figure again, I stared at Darragh’s back. “If she survives the burrow and I get out of here, I will kill you quickly,” Darragh threatened. “But if she dies while you have me trapped here, your suffering will be immeasurable. I will—”
The figure laughed, a horrible, wheezing sound. “I suggest you start planning my lengthy torture. She won’t leave the burrow alive.” Darragh’s fists balled at his sides. The figure bent its long, cloaked neck directly before Darragh. “Boy, do you know who I am?”
“You’re the Cage,” Darragh scowled. “The one creature people hate more than me. Disgusting. Foul. Thing !”
“Such fortitude,” the Cage hissed. Skeletal hands pulled the hood away. Pale, papery skin covered what was more of a skull than a face. The nose had long rotted away, replaced by two sunken holes. More alarmingly, the top half of the Cage’s face was covered in eyes. It blinked, and hundreds of eyes blinked at once. The Cage skirted the edge of the trap, reaching long, spindly fingers for me. Frozen in place, I did nothing to stop the hand curling around my arm. The brittle bones were deceptive, the strength in the Cage’s grip was breathtaking, like someone slid a pressure cuff on me and blew it up tight—my arm would surely snap. The Cage dragged me away from Darragh and laughed. “Take one last look at him while you can.”
The resolve on Darragh’s face vanished, replaced by cold dread. He mouthed the word, “ Run .” I waved and smiled half-heartedly. Darragh’s shoulders sagged.
The last thing I saw was his head hung in defeat.
The same fog that brought me to Darragh took me away. I came out in a stone-walled room. Hazel leaned against the wall, picking her nails. I coughed to announce my arrival and Hazel snapped to attention. When she realized the Cage hadn’t followed me, she relaxed.
“I brought you a few things.” She handed me a pile of clothing.
“Oh.” I took the items in a haze. “Thanks.”
“You’re naked, by the way.”
“Oh, my!” I clutched the clothing, covering everything important. How long ago had my dress faded?!
Hazel turned around and I yanked on pants. I stuffed Darragh’s talismans in my pocket, bar the ring I’d already slipped on my finger. I liked the shine and weight of it and—why am I explaining myself? It’s just a ring. I pulled a thin flannel shirt over my head, snapped a belt around my waist, and slid on a pair of black boots.
Hazel handed me a satchel. “I’ve filled this with a few things you might need. ”
“Thank you.” I pulled the strap over my head and nestled the bag at my side. “Why are you helping me?”
“If you succeed, perhaps the Queen will be kinder to us all.” Hazel tilted her head sympathetically, seeming so much older than ten.
“What was that thing?” I asked.
Hazel looked behind us before whispering, “The Cage,” like that meant something to me.
“Yes but, what is it?”
Hazel became increasingly distressed, as if speaking the thing’s name out loud three times might summon it. For all I knew, it could. “I don’t really know.” Hazel lowered her voice. “If you go to the Cage, you don’t come back.”
“But we just did.”
“Darragh’s just being held . He hasn’t been sentenced yet.”
“Oh. I see.”
Hazel escorted me out. In the hall, the baby-faced man from the ball spoke to a woman in a slinky black dress. He said, “Can his power work in there?”
Did he mean Darragh? I made eye-contact with the man as we passed. Hazel approached a door—
“Please allow me!” the man ran forward and opened the door for us. He smiled, a charming, wide smile filled with perfect white teeth.
Despite my upset, I smiled back. An unfortunate reflex I’d learned over the years. I murmured, “Thank you.” One of the man’s gloved hands reached out and grabbed hold of me. “What the—”
“Excuse me!” Hazel snapped. Without releasing my arm, the man reached into my pocket.
“What are you doing?” I tried to wriggle away.
“I think that’s enough,” Hazel commanded, but made no move to pry the man off. He slid his hand out of my pocket and released me. “Let’s go.” Hazel tugged my pants. I checked my pocket.
Darragh’s enchanted talismans were gone.
The man mouthed a, ‘ Thank you .’
He blew me a kiss as Hazel dragged me away.