Chapter 38
After our talk, Nayana fell asleep on my lap, and I let her nap for half an hour before picking her up and getting us both back on the horse.
She didn’t even stir, and I somehow managed to tuck her safely into my arms. Also, I withdrew my magic.
Thinking about it amused me. When it first happened, I’d been surprised to see my tendrils coiled around Nayana—most of the time, I hadn’t even noticed that I’d been conjuring them.
Since she’d never objected, I allowed myself to have some fun and actively continued to engulf her with my magic.
Couldn’t say that I hated having her in some kind of restraints—it always felt safer when I knew I could whisk her out of danger in seconds.
Nayana was right about one thing after all—I did prefer to have a certain level of control over everything around me.
The fear as I’d witnessed the tail of the Wailos crashing into her back had been almost unbearable, and the sound she’d made on impact would haunt my nightmares for a long time.
But in the end, the whole situation made me see one thing clearly. If she wanted the Rite, I wouldn’t fight it. The merit of keeping Nayana safe weighed ten times more than the fact that she’d soon hate me.
Just a few more days and we’d arrive in Amalach. It felt like we were living on borrowed time. After our conversation, my gut told me it was likely Nayana would probably opt for the binding.
I scoffed as I argued with fate and circumstance, persisting in throwing this tiny woman my way. I’d tried so hard to keep my distance, but I’d failed spectacularly.
Finally, we arrived at the village where we were supposed to meet the others, and I pulled myself out of my brooding.
All that wallowing wasn’t me, and I hated how moody I’d become these past few months.
Often, regaining my indifference was all I wanted, but deep down, I knew that I’d never be the person I once was.
Antas’ plan had worked, and if I’d known of his scheming beforehand, I would have simply refused to engage in this insanity.
In the end, should Naya decide in favor of the Rite, she would have to live with the consequences, just like me. I’d warned her often enough.
By the time we dismounted, I’d already hardened myself.
I plucked Naya off the horse before I collected our room key from Ireas, whom I met in the stables, tending to the left hind leg of Fig’s horse.
The poultice he was using smelled atrocious, so I hurried to leave and find the bedroom that was ours for the night.
I secured the tiny chamber with a few shadows before walking downstairs to the in-house tavern.
Luckily, I found Antas sitting there, nursing an ale. I motioned to the barmaid for one as well and sat down across from my uncle. “How are Fiolar and Carthain?”
“Alive. Fig is already complaining that Ireas put him on bed rest, and both he and Thain will be well enough to travel tomorrow. What about Nayana?”
“Her back hurts, but she pretends it doesn’t. Didn’t call her out on it, though.” The barmaid brought my ale, and I gave her two small coins, telling her to keep the change.
Antas chuckled, a sound I rarely heard from him. “Normally, you never miss an opportunity to rattle her.”
“We had a serious talk about the Rite.” I could feel Antas’ inquiring gaze on me as I stared into my glass as if I would find the answers to all my questions down there. “We might do it.”
“Have you told—”
“No.” Antas always hated it when I interrupted him, and I usually gave him the courtesy of not doing so, but sometimes I couldn’t bother with this politeness shit.
He gave me the reproachful look involving his good eyebrow that he had reserved exclusively for me. “It’s a mistake to let her run into this blind.”
“Anything could be a fucking mistake, Antas. I haven’t asked for all this, but I’m done throwing the worlds’ smallest pity party for myself, to use your words from months ago.
Nayana will find out soon enough, and it’s better if it’s with the protection the Rite gives her than without.
Imagine we’d come clean now, and she runs away again—you know how impulsive she can be. ”
Antas sighed, but was done fighting my decision. “It is your call. There is another thing you should know. Earlier, my gift presented me with another insight.”
I sat up straighter, abandoning my ale. It wasn’t strong, but there was alcohol in the brew, after all. My uncle’s face was unreadable, and I couldn’t tell if he’d seen something good or bad.
“The urgency we are adapting is the right call. And as soon as we are closer to Amalach, you and Nayana must shadowwalk there. The rest of us will follow as fast as we can.”
“Why?”
“That I do not know.”
“I’ve never taken anyone else through the shadows.” I didn’t even know if it was possible or if it could harm her.
“Her being an Amplifier with a predisposition to darkness should benefit you there.”
I was unconvinced, but nodded. I’d witnessed before what could happen if people disregarded Antas’ hunches outright, and even though it often didn’t make the impression, I knew better than to be one of those poor fools. Even if it sometimes was damn hard. “Then we’ll do that.”
“You will know when the right time arrives. Just swear that whatever happens, you will listen to your intuition. It brought you this far.”
My uncle was intense today. I sighed internally. “I swear, Antas. Whatever happens, we’ll leave.” I waited a few moments before giving in to the strangest compulsion. “Thank you, Antas. For being patient. For everything. I know you and the others don’t have an easy time with me.”
Antas’ face softened, and he studied me before nodding. “You are more, Dion, more than your past or upbringing. It is never too late to change what you thought was your destiny forever. Use this chance while you still can.”
I nodded, and we fell into silence, having said what needed to be said.
It felt too much like the worlds stood at a precipice, and we were trying to hold them back with our bare hands as the pressure from the other side increased.
It didn’t help that I couldn’t shake the feeling that unknown forces were pushing against us as well.
After another hour of keeping Antas company in silence, I returned to my bedroom. Nayana was fast asleep, lying on her belly, and I considered waking her up so she could change into something more comfortable and more suitable for sleeping, but in the end, I didn’t. She needed her rest.
I approached the bed, gently draped the sheets over her, and brushed her blonde locks out of her face, which elicited a slight smile from her without waking her.
Gods, she was getting more beautiful with each passing day, and it cost me so much effort to tear my gaze away from her—but I had work to do.
In the corner of the room stood a small table with a chair.
I claimed both and was slightly irritated that one leg of the chair was shorter than the others, so sitting became a balancing act.
But whatever. I pulled some paper and writing utensils out of the depths of my bag and began smoothing out the parchment that hadn’t coped well with being crumpled on the bottom of my bag for several months.
When I was satisfied after a few minutes, I reached for my pen.
Since Nayana was considering the Rite of Binding, she had to learn the vow spoken at the actual ceremony, and since it’d been a long time since I’d read the actual oath, I had to remember it as well.
It didn’t take long, and the words flew out of my pen until I was satisfied with what I’d put to paper.
Not that there wasn’t some leeway in the phrasing, but a few core idioms had to be correct, or the divine magic couldn’t be invoked.
We already had to factor in that nobody could know for sure how kindly the gods would react if the Rite wasn’t conducted by a priest.
As I put my pen down, I slightly frowned at the parchment and realized somewhere deep in my guts that I was certain we would go through with this, almost as if it were inevitable. That godsdamned seer must have already known, or why else would she have given me the relics?
I took the wooden box from my bag and set it on the table.
I muttered a colorful curse under my breath as the rickety chair wobbled, and I quickly checked that I hadn’t woken Nayana with all the noise.
When I found her still fast asleep, my eyes lingered on her for a moment before I turned back to the small chest and opened the lid.
I couldn’t help but admire the Dagger of Kalag and the Vessel of Immaru for a while.
The intricate engravings seemed to flow and dance in the light of the flickering candle.
My fingers lightly stroked the material of the ancient relics that had been thought lost to time.
We wouldn’t have a priest, but these two artifacts would certainly benefit us.
Even I could feel the divine energy humming deep within them.
In the end, I closed the lid and safely stored the box with my belongings. The chair tried to throw me off again, and I scowled at the wooden thing dead set on annoying me beyond reason.
Calling it a night, I quickly washed up and changed before joining Nayana in the small bed.
My arms itched to pull her to me, but considering her back—which had to be a giant bruise—I decided against it with a heavy heart.
She needed time to heal, and we had so little of that already, so I should at least let her have a restful sleep.
Instead, I allowed another tendril of smoke to curl around her wrist so I could at least feel a small connection.
Pondering about everything, I closed my eyes and slowly drifted off.