Chapter 36
‘You’re sure you’ll be OK?’ Steven said for what seemed like the hundredth time.
‘I don’t really like thinking of you being alone here.
’ They were sitting up in bed, trying to will themselves to get up and dressed.
It was New Year’s Eve and in an hour, Steven and her family would be on the road, heading home.
‘I know. But it’s only three months now. And you’ll be over in a few weeks’ time, if your leave isn’t cancelled again.’
‘I’d like to see them try,’ he said darkly, and she laughed.
‘You’d say yes immediately if they asked.’
‘Yeah,’ he admitted. ‘I probably would. You know me too well.’
He’d managed to swap shifts with one of the other nurses, and the new staff member the hospital had taken on had already relieved the pressure a little. But as he had to work on the second of January, he had to travel back today.
But she didn’t really mind. ‘It’s OK. You care. It’s one of the things I love about you.’
‘Tell me some of the other things,’ he said, an eyebrow raised.
She laughed as he leaned in to kiss her. ‘Oh, I can’t think,’ she teased. ‘You’re going to have to remind me.’
* * *
Later she hugged her family in the hallway, feeling a little more tearful. Her father gave her a quick tight squeeze, and Mum held her for a bit longer. ‘And you’ve got enough food?’ she asked.
‘Mum. I’ve got enough leftovers in the freezer to last me until summer. I’ll be fine.’
‘Sorry.’
Nicola laughed. ‘You don’t need to say sorry for caring. Honestly.’ She wrapped her arms around her mum. ‘It means a lot.’
Her mum’s arms tightened around her. ‘I just… You never stop being a mum, you know. Even when you’re both so grown up.’
‘I know.’
Harriet handed Gabi – whom she’d taken quite a shine to during the visit – back to her before saying her own goodbyes. ‘I’ll be back to visit as soon as I can,’ she said.
‘Are you talking to me, or the kitten?’
‘Duh. The kitten, of course. I’m sorry, I love you, Nic, but you’re definitely not as cute as that little thing.’
Nic stood on the step and watched as the car containing her family, her heart, signalled right then headed along the road until the black people carrier was no longer visible. Then she turned and made her way back inside.
It was warm in the house, and she put Gabi down into her basket and sat heavily in one of the armchairs.
It had been lovely to see her family, had been one of the best Christmases she could remember.
But it was nice, too, to have a moment to herself, to take everything in and put her feet up for a moment.
Having guests was exhausting, however welcome they were.
She must have dozed off as the next thing she knew, there was a knock at the door.
She dragged herself to her feet, hoping it might be Lucien with some more news.
He’d popped in a couple of times during the past few days, drinking coffee with her family and updating them on Annabelle’s condition.
She was recovering well, although she had a long road ahead.
Instead, she opened the door to an old man in a red jumper and thick wool coat. Behind him hovered a younger woman with blonde curly hair. Both were smiling widely.
‘Monsieur Rémi!’ she said, moving to hug him without really thinking and then wondering whether it might have been a little too much.
He hugged her back. ‘Nicola!’ he said.
Over coffee, Laurence explained how she’d brought him back from Versailles at his insistence, that they’d found a small apartment close to the town centre. But he was hopeful that the builders would start repairs in the next month or so, and he’d be back by the summer.
‘So you will have to put up with having a neighbour again,’ he said.
‘I’ll look forward to it.’
Steven called from the road two hours later when she was making a little soup for tea, hoping to clean up her diet now that new year was nearly upon them.
The journey was going well, although her father had kept falling asleep in the back and snoring loudly.
‘He’s worse than you!’ her husband had joked.
‘Hey, I don’t snore!’
‘I beg to differ.’
Darkness had fallen, but the sky was clear.
No more snow was on the horizon, and when she stepped outside to gather wood from the log store, the stars sparkled, jewel-like in the navy sky.
She looked up and could still see the one and only constellation she knew – Orion’s Belt – in the same place as it had been when she’d last stared up at the night sky.
It seemed odd that the whole time her life had been playing out with all its ups and downs, the same distant suns had been shining down on her.
She resolved – and perhaps it could be a new year’s resolution – to learn a few more constellations and see if she could recognise anything new.
And she closed her eyes and made a wish, because who knew?
Maybe there was such a thing as luck, and if there was, she was going to make sure she made the most of it.
Nicola was bending over the grate, adding yet another log to the crackling blaze, when there was another knock on the door. Wiping the soot from her hands, she made her way to open it, wondering who it could be.
It was nice to think that there was more than one answer to that.
She hoped it was Lucien with news, but it could equally be her friend Chloé, or Brenda, who’d promised she’d pop in at some point.
She’d already had her friend – and she did now see him as a friend – Monsieur Rémi come to wish her the best of the season.
It was a small group of friends, sure, but they were all new and it felt like the start of a wonderful year.
The new beginning she’d dreamed of back in England when they’d first discussed the possibility of doing something different.
Opening the door, she smiled as she saw it was indeed Lucien standing there, looking very pleased with himself. He thrust a box into her hand.
‘What’s this?’
‘Annabelle’s mother made them. Madeleines. She asked me to bring them to you, to thank you for caring for Matthieu.’
‘Oh, she shouldn’t have.’
‘Ah, but you know mothers. They are hard to say no to. Especially when it comes to food.’
She laughed and went to switch on the kettle.
They had almost a routine now. She’d make coffee, or tea if it was late, and they’d sit and he’d update her on everything from the hospital.
The improvements that were happening daily but his worries too – the things he couldn’t express to his mother-in-law, not wanting to upset her.
Annabelle would be home in a few weeks, all being well, and he wanted to make life as smooth as possible for her.
Matthieu was at nursery, but they’d need a bit of extra help with childcare for a while.
Annabelle’s mother had agreed to stay on for a few weeks to help out, which was both wonderful and quite stressful for both of them.
‘She is a wonderful cook, a wonderful mother. But you can imagine there is a stress to living with my mother-in-law,’ he’d told her last time.
‘I always have to be on my best behaviour.’
‘Ooh, so what bad behaviour are you holding back?’ she’d teased, and he’d laughed.
‘You have no idea.’
Tonight, the news was much the same. Annabelle was continuing to have her medications adjusted but was tolerating them well.
The surgeons seemed happy, and she was regaining her strength.
Matthieu was impatient for his mother to be home, and although he knew she had a new heart and they’d need to look after her, he was too young to understand that he had to be very gentle with her.
The couple of times he’d been to visit he’d wanted to jump on the bed and been furious when he’d been told no.
‘You know,’ Lucien said, ‘I keep thinking back to how desperate it had become. Doctors told us it could have been days, if a heart had not been found. I cannot imagine… We are so very lucky that everything happened in time.’
‘Maybe it’s the angel,’ she joked. Then blushed. ‘I obviously don’t really think that,’ she added. ‘Joking.’
‘Ah, but you never know, perhaps it was that. Perhaps it was the candle I lit in the church. Maybe even Matthieu’s letter to Père Noel was what made the magic happen.
And it is magic, to me. The idea of putting a new heart into my wife’s chest, having it beat for her.
And the generosity of the family who lost their loved one too. It is all magic, all of it.’
‘Not sure the surgeons would agree.’
‘Or maybe they are not surgeons but magicians!’ he said. ‘They brought my wife back to life. It seems impossible.’
They both laughed, then fell into silence. Nicola sipped her green tea thoughtfully. ‘You know I wished on a star last night,’ she said. ‘The old me would have laughed at anyone doing that.’
‘What did you wish for?’
‘Ah, that would be telling. But it sounds to me from talking to you that my wish has been granted.’
In fact, she thought, looking around at her beautiful house, remembering how it was filled with warmth and love at Christmastime, and knowing that even when she was alone here that she now felt it truly was her home; thinking of all that had happened in the past few weeks – the accident, her fears about Steven, even Gabi who’d recovered from hypothermia and had proved to her that not all cats had it in for her – it was a little like all her wishes had come true.
And maybe it was the angel. Maybe it was the lucky stars she’d wished on. Maybe it was simply fate she had to thank. Or perhaps it was simply chance, and the determination she’d felt to keep going even when things were bleak. Maybe it was the friends she’d made and the kindness they’d shown her.
It didn’t matter, she realised. Whether it was the lucky angel or just the normal ups and downs of life.
What mattered was she was here, she was loved, the people who loved her were OK.
And – she glanced at the clock and realised it was past eleven – that she was excited for the next year and Steven and their new adventure.
She clinked her cup to Lucien’s. ‘To the future,’ she said.
He laughed and clinked his back. ‘To whatever the next year will bring.’
* * *