6. Chapter 6 #2
Ridge is right. He’s saying everything I’ve known since the moment I meant Grant.
Our relationship has never been conventional.
Our chemistry has always been electric, to the point people have assumed we were together, but we never gave each other those titles.
Sure, we’ve hooked up over the years in our own little friends-with-benefits situation.
It was easy to do. We ran in the same circles, always showing up to parties together, and when I needed a plus-one, he was always there for me.
Much like he is now. But deep down, I’ve been too afraid to let him in completely, to let him love me, because I’m terrified I’ll wake up and he’ll be gone. Like my dad…and my mom.
I swallow hard. “You think I should give him a chance?”
Ridge shrugs. “I don’t think you should force anything, but see how things progress. You’re already giving him a chance by moving in with him. You’re at a vulnerable point, and you’re letting him in, letting him see you.”
“I’m not trying to force some fairy-tale ending.”
“No one is going to think that.”
“But he’s a coach now, and I’m a student. Isn’t that frowned upon or crossing a line?”
“Fuck that. You two aren’t strangers, and this isn’t some creepy power move. You have history, a connection that didn’t end when the relationship—or whatever—did. And honestly?” He pauses, a smile tugging at his lips. “You deserve to be loved like that.”
My brow furrows. “Like what?”
“Like a princess.”
I roll my eyes, even as my chest warms at the thought.
“No, but seriously, you deserve to be loved like you’re not a mess someone has to deal with. Like you’re worth showing up for, no matter how hard it gets. Like you and your baby are the most important thing in someone’s world, and I believe Grant Campbell will love you like that.”
I blink fast, staring at the romantic in front of me, wondering where my dark angel cousin went. But no matter how fast I blink, I can’t keep the tears at bay.
“You’ve been looking for unconditional love your whole life. Maybe it’s finally showing up by literally landing on your doorstep. Don’t be scared to believe it’s real.”
I don’t know what to say. Silence fills the room, but only for a moment. In the most ungraceful move, I reach forward and shove Ridge in the shoulder. It’s awkward as I try to lean over my large stomach from this sitting position. We both laugh at the spectacle.
“When did you become so soft?” I ask around a laugh.
He winks. “Only for you, Savvy.”
Pushing against the floor, Ridge stands to his full height, reaching out a hand for me to take.
With my hand in his and his other holding my elbow, he helps me to my feet.
Ridge pulls me into a hug before breaking away as if this conversation never happened.
I watch as he goes back to the living room to start packing while I stand there, dumbfounded.
My mind drifts to Grant, and I wonder what he’s doing right now. Is he having an internal panic like me? Or is he calm and excited as he makes room in his townhouse for me and Jellybean?
Even though every part of me is overwhelmed and terrified, there’s a tiny flame of hope that flickers inside me.
What if it’s different this time?
Hours later, after the golden light has faded from a soft amber to a deep blue twilight, I look around at all the packed boxes.
With the last box of the night sealed, everything feels so drab in this tiny space.
I can see through fresh eyes how dingy this apartment is, but it was my first solo space.
Even with the cracks, I made it our home. Temporary as it may have been.
Pouring hot water into a mug, I let the mint tea steep.
Letting out a groan, Ridge stretches in the doorway of the kitchen.
He has to be exhausted. As soon as I called him last night, he started pulling strings with contacts to get a flight to Texas.
He arrived sometime in the middle of the night, and instead of waking me, he sat outside my building, making sure the place was secure.
“I’ll crash on the couch. Door’s locked, and everything’s quiet downstairs. No one’s getting in here unless I say so.”
I nod, unable to say thank you without my throat closing. I still can’t believe he came all this way. Reaching for my mug, I toss the tea bag into the trash before heading toward my room.
“Thanks for everything.” I say quietly, holding back the emotions surfacing all over again. “Goodnight.”
“Night, Savvy,” Ridge calls out. Glancing behind me, I watch briefly as he unfolds a few blankets we left out and spreads them over the couch.
My bedroom is nearly empty, with my mattress and a lamp sitting on my nightstand beside it.
Easing onto my bed, I bring my mug to my lips.
Blowing on the hot liquid, I take a tentative sip, savoring the minty flavor.
The silence in my room is deafening and only sparks my racing mind.
I take in the creaky pipes. The sounds of cars driving by.
The hum of the fridge. This is the last night I’ll fall asleep to their soundtrack.
Tomorrow, it’ll be new sounds in a new space. In his space.
With my mug empty, I place it on the table before curling into my covers. The further into this pregnancy I get, the harder it is to get comfortable. I’ve made my version of a nest with pillows and blankets.
Closing my eyes, I replay Ridge’s voice from earlier.
“You’ve been looking for unconditional love your whole life. Maybe it’s finally showing up by literally landing on your doorstep. Don’t be scared to believe it’s real.”
It’s hard not to cry when someone believes in you more than you do. Based on the number of tears I’ve shed today, I need to drink extra water tomorrow to avoid dehydration.
I think about Grant—how he showed up, unasked.
How he stood in my apartment, come hell or high water, to make sure I was okay.
How Ridge said Grant stared him down, ready to fight for me.
Ridge is no joke. And when I initially said no to moving in, Grant didn’t push—he gave me space to think it through.
During our freshman year, lying across his dorm room bed, limbs tangled, we made a promise.
A promise to keep things simple. Date other people, experience the college life everyone talks about, and someday, we’d circle back to each other.
When we earned our degrees and were ready to start our futures.
At the time, it felt like the right decision.
I had moved thousands of miles from home, looking for a fresh start and a way to be independent.
I never thought I’d fall for the first boy who caught my eye.
I told myself it was better this way. Better to live in the maybe than losing him forever…
or to feel his love, only for him to abandon me.
I planned a life with him once, and it unraveled in the blink of an eye. I didn’t realize how badly I wanted that life with him until it slipped through my fingers.
Now here I am, getting a second chance.
It won’t happen overnight, but maybe I can start giving him pieces of my heart…until time gives him all of it.
Rolling onto my side, I curl the blanket under my chin.
Closing my eyes, I start to drift off as my mind slows.
A picture paints itself behind my eyelids.
One of me and Grant. In this picture, his hands are full of a sleeping baby wrapped in my crochet blanket.
He’s looking at the baby like he looked at me in that photo years ago.
With warmth. Love. Happiness.
It’s fleeting. But it’s enough to let me fall asleep with hope blooming in my soul.