Chapter Twenty-Four
Todd
“Hey, how was Texas?” I ask from my spot on the couch when Taylor walks in Sunday night.
“Good,” she replies, her voice strained. “I’m gonna hop in the shower.”
She leaves her luggage by the door and does just that, and I don’t think much of it until nearly twenty minutes have passed.
I go to check on her, steam filling the bathroom.
Reaching for the shower curtain, I slowly pull it back. “Taylor?”
She’s sitting, her arms wrapped around her legs, the water beating down on her.
Noticing me, she quickly wipes her face.
“I’m sorry, I lost track of time. I’ll be out in a minute.”
She stands, and I feel like I’ve been dismissed, but I remain frozen in place.
“What’s wrong?”
“Nothing—I told you I just lost track of time. I’m exhausted. It’s been a long weekend.”
“You’re crying.”
She glares at me, her eyes red and puffy. “Will you just let me shower in peace?”
I back away. “All right, I’ll be in the living room, if you want to talk about it when you’re done.”
I go back to the couch and wait, but another half hour passes, and she doesn’t make an appearance.
I open her bedroom door; the lights are off and the lump in the bed tells me she’s in it, but her sniffling gives away she isn’t asleep.
“You might not want to hear this, but it could help if you’d talk about it,” I say, keeping my tone light even though I genuinely want to know what’s upsetting her. “Taylor?”
“It’s Emma . . .” she says, heaving a sigh. “I can’t accept the job with the Rangers—I can’t move halfway across the country when I have to take care of her.”
“Your mom should be taking care of Emma—or even your dad.” As soon as the words leave my mouth, I know they’re the wrong thing to say.
“That’s easy for you to say! You have two great parents who take care of you. I’d give anything to be in your shoes right now!” She sits up, her eyes like knives. “This is why I didn’t want to tell you!”
“I’m—”
“No, you don’t understand what I’m feeling right now. Emma’s my sister—I have an obligation to take care of her—I can’t just abandon her when she needs me more than ever.”
“What about Chase? Have you discussed this with him?”
“No.”
“Because you know he’ll say the same thing, and you can’t accuse him of not understanding.”
Her eyes flash, telling me I’ve crossed a line. I expect her to kick me out, but instead she says, “Emma’s pregnant—I don’t know what her plans are yet, but I’ve promised her I’d help her figure it out. But even if she doesn’t keep the baby, she’s going to need my support.”
I reach for her. “Oh, Taylor . . .” In all the scenarios I envisioned, I hadn’t expected this one.
“No, Todd—” She pulls away. “I don’t want your pity. I just want to go to sleep and forget about this entire weekend.”
“You think all I’m offering is pity?”
“That’s what you do when I’m upset—you pity me.
It’s why you go with me to the batting cages, why you pulled me into your bed that night I fought with my mother, and why you’re here right now.
You hold me, you soothe me, you let me cry, but in the back of your mind, you can’t possibly enjoy doing any of it. ”
“I’m your friend! That’s what friends do for one another!”
“Exactly! For one another! Since you’re the only one doing it, our friendship feels a little one-sided—don’t you think?”
I drag a hand down my face, unsure how to convey the depth of my feelings. “If I didn’t want to do the things I do for you, I wouldn’t—I do them because . . .”
She squints. “Why, Todd?”
I consider all the ways I could articulate my feelings.
Friendship doesn’t compel me to comfort her, and it’s not about pity—it’s simply what you do for those you love.
That’s why she’s caught in this emotional tug-of-war.
She loves her sister, and despite everything their mother puts her through, she loves her too.
The truth is, love is confusing. Seeing Taylor lying there makes my chest ache with the urge to hold her tightly and show her that someone cares just as deeply.
While these thoughts make sense in my mind, putting them into words proves challenging. She watches me, her gaze expectant, waiting for my response. But in the end, I don’t give her one. Instead, I step closer, cradle her face in my hands, and kiss her.