Chapter 4 #3
When I join him in the kitchen, he’s leaning against the counter, reading a paperback.
I don’t know why he’s chosen to do it there; Daniel’s got his own ways of doing things, and I’ve learned not to question them.
I leave him to it and work around him to put out cutlery, plates, and beer.
Then I change my mind and switch mine for a soda.
I had a couple of beers and two shots last night, and I like to have some alcohol-free days every week just to prove I can.
I’ve got two uncles who are drunks, and it’s not a path I want to go down.
The oven timer dings, and Daniel puts down his book and comes to the table while I dish up. It’s only after we’ve both shoveled in several mouthfuls that we talk.
“Was that Josh guy weird with you?” he asks.
I finish chewing and swallow. “Yeah, but I met him last night, so he kinda had a reason. Was he weird with you too?”
“You met him last night? Wait, he’s the guy who had you all smiles when you got back this morning?” He puts his fork down. Daniel’s a sucker for gossip.
“Yeah. But that stays between us, right?”
“Of course.”
“Won’t breathe a word,” another voice says, and we both jump.
“Jesus Christ,” Daniel hisses, clutching his chest. “What have we said about warning us?” He scowls at Carter, who’s suddenly materialized in one of the other two chairs at the table.
“This is my house, young man,” Carter snarks.
“You’re lucky I choose to let you live here.
” Carter was a farm manager when the estate was still a private home.
There was a lot more land then, and apparently the estate was self-sufficient and even profitable.
The house Daniel and I live in was originally the manager’s cottage, making it almost as historic as the main house, and Carter lived here back when he was alive…
and died here of a heart attack. Or maybe a stroke.
There wasn’t a doctor nearby at the time, and obviously no requirement for an autopsy or anything like that, so nobody’s really sure how he died, only that he was found the next morning by a farmhand who came looking.
And he’s been here ever since.
In case you’re wondering, yes, it’s odd having a ghost for a roommate. Although he likes to hang out with the other ghosts at the house a lot, which gives us a break. Apparently Daniel and I are too boring for him, now that we’ve stopped bringing dates home.
“We’ve talked about this, Carter,” I remind him. “We all need to show respect for each other. Or we’ll hire an exorcist.” Not that we’d have any idea where to find an exorcist, but the threat of it is usually enough to pull him back in line.
Carter heaves a sigh. “Very well. I’ll try to ring a bell or something. Oh, I know, a ghostly wind! If you feel the air stirring, know I am near.”
Because that doesn’t sound disturbing at all.
“Now, tell us everything, Ewan.” He plants his elbows on the table and props his chin in his hands. It’s eerie sometimes how solid and real ghosts can look.
I shrug. “I’ve basically told it all. I met Josh—you know who Josh is?”
He nods. “Hattie called a meeting. I’m quite looking forward to meeting him. It will be good to talk to a human without having to expend so much energy on manifesting.” Somehow, he manages to make it sound like our fault we can’t see dead people.
“We can’t wait for you to do that either,” I say with a straight face. “Anyway, I met Josh last night, then this morning Kieran hired him, and we realized we knew each other. That’s it.”
Carter narrows his eyes. “Did you just meet, or did you meet?”
“Carter, that’s an intrusive question about Ewan’s personal life,” Daniel says solemnly. “I think it might even constitute sexual harassment.”
“So report me to HR,” Carter retorts. “You’re not tricking me this time. I watch TV. I know how these things work. Kieran can’t fire me, because I don’t officially work here anymore. Even if I do try to help out.” He sniffs, and Daniel rolls his eyes.
“We appreciate your help, Carter,” I say, trying really hard not to laugh.
Carter loves modern farming methods and drives Daniel to distraction insisting that we upgrade the farm.
Last year he spent an entire afternoon trying to convince Kieran that demonstrating nineteenth-century farming practices was stupid and that if we’d just let him buy all the latest equipment, he could make the farm profitable.
Which… no. Even if the estate wasn’t an immersive historic experience, there’s no way the little bit of land remaining could be made profitable by farming alone. But Carter won’t be dissuaded.
“But I’d really rather not discuss such personal details,” I finish, crossing my toes that he’ll accept it.
He sighs. “I don’t know why you won’t talk to me about your sexual exploits,” he complains. “It’s downright odd that you never bring anyone here to sodomize anymore. You always stay in town.”
“It’s just more convenient. Also, after what happened the last time…” Carter manifested in my bedroom while my date and I were busy and asked—loudly—if that position was comfortable, and wouldn’t we get more pleasure if our limbs weren’t at such odd angles?
Needless to say, my date freaked out. Ghosts can look astoundingly real, so first he thought I’d invited another guy in to watch. I finally convinced him—with a lot of unhelpful commentary from Carter—that our visitor was a ghost, and then he freaked out about that too. Nobody came that night.
Of course, that’s nothing compared to the first time I brought someone back here.
Carter had never seen two guys fucking before.
Fortunately, he was already a big fan of Ellen and Queer Eye, so I didn’t have to deal with any hate, but he was very interested in the mechanics of it all and had questions.
It’s Carter’s turn to roll his eyes. “Will you never forgive me for that? I’ve said I’m sorry. But how am I supposed to learn if I don’t ask questions?”
Daniel snorts. “There’s a time and a place for questions, Carter. That was not it.”
Pouting, Carter turns puppy eyes on me. I used to have this image of nineteenth-century farmers being stoic and taciturn, but boy, have I learned different.
Or maybe most of them were, and Carter’s just adapted over the centuries.
He does watch a lot of sitcoms and shitty reality TV.
“But you’ll tell me about your meeting with Josh, right? ”
“No. You’ll blab to all the other ghosts, and then someone will say something to Josh and make him feel uncomfortable. Which will make me the asshole for telling you in the first place.”
He frowns. “You were the asshole? I thought it was called the bottom? And don’t you prefer to—”
“Holy crap, Carter, stop talking now,” Daniel shouts, laughing so hard I think he’s going to fall off his chair. I bite my lip to hold in my own guffaws.
“I’m not talking to you about Josh,” I tell Carter. “And you’re not talking to the other ghosts about what you heard here. Okay?”
He grumbles but finally agrees.
“Good. Now, I’m going to finish my dinner before it gets completely cold.”
“That’s not interesting at all. I’m going up to the house to watch Kardashian reruns.”
“Enjoy,” Daniel says, sounding somewhat strangled.
We wait until we’re fairly sure he’s actually gone, killing time by talking about the weather and the upcoming hockey playoffs. Carter hates hockey, so it’s not likely he’ll stick around to hear about that.
“So…,” Daniel begins. “You hooked up with the guy Kieran hired?”
“Complete accident.” I shake my head. “We didn’t even exchange names. Then he kicked me out this morning on his way into the bathroom.”
“Yikes. Poor guy. Can’t have been fun for him to turn up here and see you. Is he out, at least?”
Oh, wow. I hadn’t even thought of that. “I think so? He wasn’t trying to be discreet or anything when we met.” Fuck, did I just out him to Daniel? “Dan—”
“Relax. I won’t say a word. It’s up to him if he wants to come out to me.” He purses his lips. “He might think I already know? Maybe that’s why he was being so weird today. He could barely look me in the eye.”
“Really?” That is weird. People generally get along well with Daniel.
“Yeah. And conversation was a nonstarter. I was lucky to get short sentences instead of monosyllables. I’m not used to working so hard.”
I shrug. “It wasn’t like he was chatty last night, but he seemed okay this morning… until he wasn’t. I dunno. I guess we’ll have to wait and see.”
“And hope Carter keeps his mouth shut in the meantime. Hey, do you think Josh could do something to keep Carter out of our bedrooms? It would be nice not to wake up to find a ghost watching me sleep.”
“We can ask.” That would be a luxury. And that’s only the times we see him. Who knows when else he’s watching us? I’ve gotten some creepy feelings while in the shower.
Daniel lifts his beer bottle and clinks it against my soda. “I’ve got a feeling things are going to change around here.”