Chapter 2
GENIE
Now
I’ve worked hard to become Genie McNamara, a respectable mother of two and a devoted wife to my husband Gray, a successful self-made businessman who has always worked hard for his family.
From the outside we look like the picture-perfect family; with our two teenage children, a daughter, Cassie and a younger son called Will.
Having been together since I just turned nineteen, we’ve lived a charmed life so far but there has always been that dread that one day my long-kept secret would come back to haunt me.
Friday night in the McNamara household is always Netflix night; we each take turns to choose something to watch.
Most Fridays Gray and I order a takeaway when he gets back from work to make the most of our evening together.
It’s Gray’s choice tonight, he’s chosen a Netflix documentary which has just come out today called Musical Muses: The Girl in the Song.
I’m snuggled comfortably up against Gray’s familiar, solid body, as the credits begin. I’ve already had a glass of wine with dinner, and I feel sleepy and content but as soon as I see who’s being interviewed, I’m completely wide awake.
Ed Nash. My ‘Ed’, my ex-boyfriend is here in my living room in crystal clear HD looking straight at me and my husband.
Ed’s song “Used to Be” has been everywhere recently and so far I’ve managed to avoid the subject with Gray, but here tonight my anxiety is building that tonight I’m going to be found out.
‘Can you pause it for a sec? I just need the loo.’ I say, extricating myself as quickly as I can from Gray.
‘You always do this when we’re about to watch something!’ Gray calls out as I leave the room, chuckling to himself, so used to my idiosyncrasies, after a lifetime together.
‘Sorry! Won’t be long!’ I shout back as I close the downstairs bathroom door behind me, giving me a few minutes to myself to try and work out what to say to Gray once he puts two and two together about me and Ed.
What on earth was Ed doing on that show I wondered.
He looked good, though older, obviously, but he was no match for Gray.
I splash my face with cold water and wonder just how long it was before Gray and everyone else starts asking me questions about my former life as teenage Evie Del Rio?
It doesn’t bear thinking about. I briefly contemplate feigning illness to avoid Gray seeing Ed’s interview, but I realise that he will inevitably watch or hear about this documentary sooner or later.
I return to the sitting room and resume my position cuddled up, close and safe against my husband’s comfortable body and watch the screen intently at the man who once meant everything to me open his heart to the world in his search for me. I’m convinced that Gray can hear my racing heartbeat.
Ed was being interviewed by music journalist Mick Kennedy who seemed to be very well acquainted with Ed. They had that casual, blokey banter between them that seemed so popular nowadays on television.
I’d hoped that Gray would have nodded off by now, like he often does after a hard week at work but unfortunately for me he’s wide awake and takes in every single word of the interview.
After what seems an age, the interview is at an end and as the credits roll, I find myself letting out a breath that I wasn’t even aware that I was holding.
‘What do you fancy watching now?’ Gray asks casually.
‘I don’t mind. Maybe Squid Game? I know you’re desperate to watch the new series.’ I suggest, relieved that on this occasion, my secret is still safe. I start to relax and settle down to watch Squid Game, despite the extreme violence, it’s a welcome distraction from my own life.