Chapter 16 #2
“You ever get tired of him, we will be happy to fill in.”
“Jesus, Brent the only reason you’re not bleeding right now is because I know it will upset Kinley. So, knock it off. We are so off-topic. Kinley needs to eat, and we need to figure out why she can project power but not shift. Also, she has questions that deserve answers.”
That seems to get the guys focused back on the problem at hand.
We all manage to get through breakfast without any further incidents or come ons.
I still can’t believe how different the guys are acting now that they have determined I’m one of them.
They were friendly before, but now they are downright caring, like I’m now an integral part of their group.
It’s so weird, but also kind of nice.I’m fully accepting that something is off with me, but I’m not convinced that I can actually change into anything.
Though, that would be pretty cool, I guess.
I try my best to explain what I saw and felt when I apparently went into that trance last night. None of them really know what to make of it. I do find out that during the trance thingy, I had been projecting so much power that it almost caused them all to shift.
“Only powerful females have that capability, Kinley. Which is why we are so stunned that you don’t shift. It looked like you were about to when you clawed up Don,” Camden states.
“We are pretty high up in the hierarchy of our clan, but we aren’t privy to enough to know what is going on with you.
But if anyone would know, it would be our clan council, and maybe then we would be able to shed some light on your circumstances,”Don says comfortingly, while stroking his thumb over my knuckles.
He hasn’t left my side during the entire conversation.
“I don’t feel all that different, though. I grew up in a normal home, not in a clan.”
“It’s ok, baby. We will figure it out.”
“Ok, so can you explain to me what you all are now? We keep dancing around it and I still have no idea what a Clan is. How does that lead to you having powers that turn you into creatures? Do you have any other powers lurking around that I should be aware of?”
They chuckle good naturedly at my list of questions. Don looks to Aiden, like he is asking him to explain.
“Ok, I’m going to give you the cliff notes version of Clan history. It is long and complicated, but I’ll try to give you enough information that we can answer your questions as best we can.”
I nod my head, thankful to maybe get some answers.
He continues, “Ok, so in a Clan, you have a council, and that council is led by three women: The Maiden, the Mother, and the Crone. These three women link us to our power source, which is basically nature, and supposedly to our Goddess. They keep the logistics hush-hush, because they don’t want other magical beings trying to hijack our power supply. ”
Holy shit, this is a lot.
“ Centuries ago, the Clans, before we officially were the Clans, had connections to Druids. Druids also have connections to nature, but they worship the Horned God. The Horned God is the counterpart to our Goddess. If the legends are true, the Horned God is very much the trickster and craves imbalance. The Druids were a Patriarchal society, and the males craved the power that the Goddess had bestowed on their females. Males were overpowering females, taking what didn’t belong to them.
I’m sure you can imagine what atrocities they were willing to do all in the name of their God? ”
I nod, trying not to think of all the horrific things people did for the sake of their religion. Hell, what people still do, for the sake of their religion. I shudder at the thought.
“But how did you all get here? How were the Clans established?”
“How my Mom tells it is that the Goddess came to the females and showed them a way out. In the dead of the night, the Goddess gave them the powers to shift into birds. Any female that was willing to brave the journey left. They fled to a new world, carrying their young with them. Even some of the males, who were disgusted by the Horned God’s wishes, fled with them. ”
“I always loved that part of the story,” Camden interjects.
They all give him knowing looks that I don’t understand, but I’m too focused on the story to ask.
“The Goddess guided her children to a land where they could live in harmony with nature, and so the Clans were born. She then taught them that in order to channel her powers, they would need the three strongest. Three is a sacred number for us for that reason, and that is how the Maiden, the Mother, and the Crone came to be.”
“Are you born with your powers?” I ask. Pictures of baby animals romping around is alarming, but also freaking adorable. Don’s voice draws me away from an extra adorable image of a foal romping around with his Kelpie’s coloring.
“No, baby, we aren’t. When we turn thirteen, we get to participate in the yearly ritual.
The Maiden’s song opens our soul up, so that our beast can link with us.
Our shifting isn’t instantaneous. It takes us a year, sometimes two, to have a stable bond with our beast. Once that happens, we start learning how to shift. ”
“Is that why I can’t shift? I’ve never participated in any ritual.”
“I don’t think that is what is going on, Kinley. You have a beast. We can all feel her,” Cam answers. I frown at that, but he continues.
“I’ve been trying to research your past. Before we knew you had Clan connections we were trying to determine why Don was so drawn to you, and also why there were magical signatures at Megan’s lake house that night.”
“Wait, you researched me? Why didn’t you tell me? And what do you mean magical signatures at Megan’s?” My eyes narrow at all of them.
“Baby, we thought you were human. We can’t go telling humans about magic unless it absolutely can’t be helped, and we still don’t have any answers,” Don says gently.
“Oh.”
“Anyways, there is no Clan anywhere close to where you grew up. In fact, there is no Clan in Texas at all, which is weird. I’m completely stumped, and I don’t have the clearance to go through Clan documents for that information.
Eventually, we will need to consult our council to help us, but we won’t do that until you are ready. ”
A frown mars my face. I should be able to remember if I had been a part of a magical community. Right?
“If it’s any consolation, we also don’t know how you’ve passed for a human this long. It should be impossible, yet here you are,” Brent adds.
“Lucky me, I’m a magical being with no known backstory or access to my magic.”
Brent chuckles. “It could be a lot worse. You could have had that episode last night around humans, and be locked up, most likely.”
“Jesus, Brent, thanks for that image,” I grumble sarcastically.
“You’re welcome, Princess.” His devilish smirk irritates the crap out of me.
I rub my forehead, feeling the beginnings of a headache. This is entirely too much information to process, but I’m the one that wanted to know. And then a thought occurs to me. My dreams.
“Um, so I’m sure you are aware that I have pretty vivid dreams. I don’t really talk about them because they are pretty graphic and honestly never made sense.
They are just something that I deal with.
” My eyes meet all of theirs and each one of them nods in encouragement, wanting me to continue.
Don siddles closer, pulling me into his body, giving me strength to continue.
“I honestly thought they stemmed from unresolved childhood trauma. My parents, before they died, weren’t people who should have had a kid.” I can sense the air shift, their concern growing, but now isn’t the time to unpack that.
“Recently, actually just before I met all of you, my dreams changed.”I blow out a shaky breath thinking about those awful images.
“How have they changed, baby?”
I meet his eyes and resolve myself to divulge what has been consuming my sleeping mind.
“There is always this dark figure. I never see his face.” My brow scrunches as I remember his painful touch.
“He calls me his Chosen, he hurts me…everytime. Claims that I’m his over and over.
No matter how much I try, I can never escape him.
” Deep rumbling growls fill the room as they listen and I stop.
“Keep going, baby.”
“He’s not the only thing I dream of. There has been a woman too, she leads me to an altar.
I’m always so stunned at how beautiful it is.
I never know why I’m there but she guides me into a ritual.
There are so many people there, I feel like I should know them, but I don’t.
I sing to them.” I glance up from my hands that I have been clenching in my lap.
They all have guarded expressions and my lips tilt in a slight frown. Why are they looking at me like that?
Aiden sits forward, his eyes boring into mine. “What do they call you in these dreams, Kinley?”
Don tenses next to me, as if he too is waiting on bated breath for me to answer. Hell, they all are. I don’t even need to ask what he means because I already know. My gaze doesn’t leave his as I say the words I worry will have repercussions that I’m not ready for. “The Maiden.”
Aiden has his phone in his hand as soon as those words leave my lips.
“Who are you calling?” my voice wavers with uncertainty.
“My mom.” He holds the phone up to his ear, his other hand tapping on his thigh as he waits for the call to be answered.
“Why her?” Don’s hand eases up and down my arm, making me realize just how stiff I’ve become. Aiden doesn’t answer me, though, and I don’t have the patience. “Why her, Aiden?” there is a sharpness to my tone that I normally would hold back.
“It’s ok, baby. Let him see if she answers.”
I can’t sit still, so I scoot out from under Don’s arm and pace as the phone seems to ring for ages. It rings and rings and I know it’s only been mere seconds but I’m so agitated I want to pick something up and throw it.
The silence is broken by a cheerful woman’s voice. “Hi! This is Willow. I’m on a retreat right now and am unavailable until the 20th. Please leave a message and as soon as I’m back I’ll contact you right away.”
I glare at Aiden and say, “Tell me why you called your mom.”
He rubs his brow, “Because if your dreams aren’t just dreams but memories then this goes way beyond our knowledge. My mom is The Mother of our Clan. Our Clans are all interconnected. If something went wrong and a Maiden was missing she would know.”
“They might not be memories, though.” Even I don’t believe the words I just uttered and neither do they.
Don’s comforting hand massages the back of my neck. I lean into his touch, desperately needing something to keep me anchored in the present.
“Look, we can try to contact Ashira later since Willow isn’t available. There isn’t anything that can’t wait until tomorrow, though.” Brent’s words are a soothing balm to my agitation, but now I need to know who Ashira is.
“Who is Ashira?”
Don’s deep voice rumbles soothingly into my back as he answers, “Ashira is our Clan’s Crone and is also Aiden’s and my grandmother. Brent is right, we can wait until tomorrow to call her and see what she knows.”
Maybe I shouldn’t have said anything about my dreams, but it’s too late to take it back. I’m also not sure how I feel about Don and Aiden being so closely related to their Clan’s governing figures. Does this change things if I really am supposed to be a Maiden?
There is so much I still don’t know, and it makes my head hurt just thinking about it.
I need to make a list of all the questions so I don’t forget.
I sigh heavily. I really need a time out from all of this.
“Is there anything else I need to know? Or are we done for now?” I sound so tired and a little lost even to my own ears.
“I think that is about it for now. If you think of any more questions, just let us know, and we will try to answer them. I’ll let you know if we learn anything as well,” Aiden says gently.
“Baby, why don’t you go lay down? This was a lot of information, and after yesterday, you could use some rest and time to process.”
“But I really need to get home and check on Beretta and Indy.”
“No, you don’t. Cam and I can do that while we are out. You should take it easy,” Brent says smoothly.
It takes very little convincing from Don before he’s leading me back to the room we slept in last night. Once he tucks me into bed, I give up. The bed is so comfy and I am really tired.
“I’m going to just be down the hall. I need to make a few calls for work.”
“Can you come lay down with me after? I don’t really want to be alone right now.”
Don’s gaze warms and then softens. Brushing my cheek with his fingertips, he leans down and kisses me sweetly.“I won’t be long; I promise.”
I pull the covers up higher and try my best to close my eyes, pushing away the stress and uncertainty that is threatening to take over. I have overcome so many things in my life already, so I can do this, too. I will put my trust in Don and hope that everything will be ok.