Chapter Ten #2
I couldn’t speak, my mouth dry, but I nodded my understanding as the jet jerked into motion, taxiing to the runway ready for takeoff. I gripped the edge of my seat, fingers aching.
“Here we go,” Hangman said, his deep voice loud in my ear.
It did little to relax me but only set me on edge in an entirely different way.
Thankfully, I didn’t have much time to consider it, thrown back in my seat as I was by the force of the jet’s acceleration.
I knew the jet was fast, but reading about it and experiencing it was an entirely different matter.
I fought against the urge to close my eyes and sooner than I had expected, my stomach lurched, the jet having left the tarmac as it began its steep incline into the sky.
I wasn’t sure if the lack of windows was a blessing or a curse.
True to Charlotte’s word, once we’d passed through the worst of the takeoff, the jet became eerily steady, even the roar of the engines seeming to dim, and I felt myself finally beginning to relax.
I met Charlotte’s eye once again, pleased to find her still watching me, and gave her a thumbs-up.
Though I couldn’t see her mouth, hidden behind the oxygen mask as it was, I could tell by the way her eyes crinkled at the corners that she was smiling.
Contrary to all the commercial flights I had been on in my life, the journey in the back of the jet passed slowly.
It was against regulations to have any loose equipment in the passenger compartment of jets like these – they became a projectile should the jet be required to perform evasive manoeuvres – but I desperately wished I could use my laptop, keen for some distraction.
Charlotte had the right idea. I could just about make out her face across the dark cabin, and I noted she had her eyes closed, attempting to get some sleep whilst she could. Once we touched down, none of us knew what was waiting ahead, but it promised to be hectic.
I wasn’t sure how long we had been flying, doing my best to zone out, but when movement caught my eye, I glanced up.
Charlotte was waving her hand at me in a bid for my attention and I frowned.
She knew I could hear her through my earpiece, so why was she— I cocked a brow quizzically, trying to interpret her hand signals.
She pointed between us, then towards the cockpit before tapping her earpiece.
Oh! She wanted to speak to me without Hangman overhearing us.
I nodded and gestured to my forearm before pointing at her.
The Infolink. I didn’t have my laptop, but Charlotte could pause the communication between us and Hangman if she wished.
Charlotte’s attention fell to the screen at her wrist, the glow illuminating her pretty features as she navigated the menus. When a bleep sounded in my ear, I knew she had been successful.
“Hangman can’t hear us now, right?” she asked.
“If you’ve paused the communication channel, no. What’s up? Why did you want to speak with me privately?”
“I’ve been thinking about things – about the three of us – and I thought maybe now was a good time to talk. We’ve got nothing else to do, right?”
I felt my shoulders bunch with tension. I didn’t want to discuss this, but Charlotte had picked her moment perfectly. I couldn’t escape her here and I knew I didn’t have it in me to stonewall her completely. I sighed heavily, my head falling back with a thud against the wall of the jet.
“What is there to say?” I muttered.
“I’m curious. Why are you so resistant to Hangman’s advances? I know you better than you know yourself. He’s exactly your type.”
I opened my mouth, floundering for what to say. In truth even I didn’t know why I fought against the other man’s interest so strongly. Charlotte was right. He was my type. He excited me, I found him painfully attractive and it seemed that it was entirely mutual… Yet I pushed him away.
“You know you have my enthusiastic consent to explore this. I don’t understand why this is so different from all the other times we’ve invited another man to be a part of what we have together,” Charlotte continued.
“Neither do I,” I replied with a short laugh.
“Do you not want to pursue him? I’m sorry if I have been too pushy. I find him exceedingly attractive and he proved to be a good lover, too, but you know you always have the right to refuse anything you want to, right?”
“Of course.” I met Charlotte’s eye. “It’s not that, I promise.”
“Then what is it? Help me understand.”
There was a long moment of silence as I weighed up my words. They felt like acid, roiling in my gut. It was just Charlotte and I here… Perhaps it was time to give words to the confusing feelings that had been crashing over me since Hangman and I had first met.
“I think Hangman could be something important, something real, something that changes things and that scares me,” I said, fighting to keep my voice steady. “Once that door is open, it can’t be closed. It feels different to all those other times.”
“It does? How?”
I held Charlotte’s eye across the cabin. “Because I really want it. I haven’t felt like that about anyone since—”
“Since we met.”
Another silence draped itself around us and I fidgeted, the weight of my words beginning to sink in.
“I’m sorry. I didn’t mean—”
Charlotte shook her head. “No, it’s alright. You know I always appreciate your honesty. No need to apologise for speaking the truth.”
I studied her as best I could through the low lighting, trying to gauge her feelings and praying I hadn’t upset her.
I knew Charlotte and I had an unusual relationship, but this was new territory for both of us.
Our playmates were usually just that – playmates.
What I was feeling for Hangman was different.
It promised to be longer lasting, to be integral…
Would that be a death sentence to what I had with Charlotte?
Just the thought of it made me feel sick.
“Would telling you that you have my blessing alleviate some of your worries about this?” she eventually asked and I blinked.
“You… You’re okay with the potential for this to—” I swallowed, barely able to say the words.
“Freddie, baby, nothing will ever separate us.” Her eyes glittered. “I like Hangman. I could see myself growing comfortable with him. I wouldn’t be opposed to him becoming a regular part of our relationship if that’s what you both want.”
My heart thumped in my chest, making me feel a little dizzy. I hadn’t considered this possibility, that I could have both. It seemed inconceivable.
“I know we’ve only just met him, but I wasn’t joking when I told you that the tension between you both is obvious.
He may have made a pass at me first, but you’d have to be blind to believe it’s me he’s really interested in,” she chuckled.
“I’m okay with that. If the potential for this to turn serious is the only reservation you have about pursuing Hangman, please put it to the back of your mind.
If it does, I’m on board, and if it doesn’t? Then we’ve had some fun, right?”
When she put it like that… I sighed. “I’m supposed to be the intelligence around here, you know?”
Charlotte laughed. “What can I say? I have my moments.”
“Can we… Can we keep this between us for now?” I asked. “I need some time to think about all of this.”
“Sure, take as long as you need, baby.”
We both sat with our thoughts for a long moment, mulling over all the revelations that had passed between us. I hadn’t expected this. I knew Charlotte was happy to be in an open relationship, but I hadn’t realised that extended so far. It was both exciting and terrifying.
One thing was for certain though – sharing a hotel room with them both was going to be interesting.