Chapter 1 #2
“Okay,” he replied sharply. “I’ll refrain from asking if you heard all good things because no one has ever said all good things about me.”
“Ah, yes. And that never gave you anything to think about?”
“Why should it? I think it’s better that people don’t get the wrong impression,” he said, irritated. “The sign was right up against our window. That's going too far!”
“I don’t know why you’re so upset.” Rachel waved her hand dismissively — and decided it was no longer worth being polite. Politeness was completely wasted on the idiot! “It’s a nice sign. And true.”
“True?” The word sounded so skillfully contemptuous that he must have practiced it in front of the mirror.
“It’s true that all the people you’ve set up stay together forever?
And here I thought Maddie lived in a unicorn enclosure in Narnia.
But you seem to have bought the castle-in-the-air right next door. ”
She jutted her chin out. “My trained fairies claim we have good statistics.”
“Your so-called business has only existed for two damn years!” he snapped. “Your statistics are worthless. And why have I never seen you here if you’re involved in this ridiculous business?”
Something bitter flooded her stomach. It was a mixture of familiar guilt and the oppressive fluttering tension she’d carried with her ever since she decided to move back here — and started questioning all her decisions.
She hadn’t been here in years. She’d let her family down.
She knew that. Another one of those decisions she wasn’t certain was the right one.
But this idiot lawyer didn’t know her. He had no right to make her feel bad!
Only she and her sisters did. Maybe her dad did too…
but she didn’t want to dive into that hole right now.
“Maybe you’re just inattentive,” she said tightly.
He snorted. “Oh, no, I would have noticed you.” He narrowed his eyes, his gaze slowly sliding down her entire body, over her light blue blouse and black pencil skirt.
She owned so many of these, she'd started calling her closet a "pencil case." Finally, his eyes landed on her bare legs and feet...which were clad in pink Crocs, partially smeared with goat manure. But going to the beach in high heels was just plain stupid, and she didn’t have any other shoes in the car since her cacti took up most of the trunk and back seat. The rest of her wardrobe wouldn’t arrive for a few weeks.
The man in the suit took his time raising his eyes again. It was as if, like her, he had a rule to gather as much information as possible before deciding what his first impression of a person was. Rachel guessed she fell squarely into the category of crazy people with goat dung on their shoes.
“You have shit on your shoes!” he said, unfazed.
She smiled. “Better on your shoes than in your head.”
He laughed dryly. “Interesting outfit,” he stated calmly as his gaze flicked back to her eyes and darkened again.
“Seriously?” Annoyed, she crossed her arms. “Are you the fashion police?”
“No, but if I were, I’d arrest you.” He lifted one corner of his mouth — it was incredibly unnerving to Rachel that it made him even more attractive.
Luckily, Rachel couldn’t stand good-looking men.
They were always the patients with such an overrated self-image that they blamed their partners entirely for all their marital problems.
“And if I were a wrecking ball, I’d take you out,” she replied tonelessly. “Our day seems to be full of disappointments on both sides.”
Hailey snorted, but the man in the suit maintained his neutral expression, as if people told him every day how much they wanted to physically attack him. “I’m noticing that you’re worse than Maddie.”
She snorted. “Everyone is worse than Maddie. Maddie’s an angel.”
“Maddie’s a wannabe Cupid who’s shooting poison darts,” he whispered, his voice suddenly dangerously calm.
“At first, I could shrug it off, but she’s putting crazy ideas into my clients’ heads.
She's ripping them off. And if there’s one thing I hate, it’s people who exploit the gullibility of others to enrich themselves. ”
“What did you say?” she spat incredulously, taking a jerky step toward him. He was starting to seriously anger her. “Did you get up on the wrong side of the bed? Why are you such a bad-tempered bastard? It’s a funny sign, not a declaration of war! It spreads love.”
“It spreads lies,” he replied coldly.
“So, love is a lie?”
“No. Your damn agency and your absurd promises are.”
Her jaw clenched. “You’re going too far,” she said, her tone a warning.
“Oh, sweetie, I haven’t even started,” he murmured darkly. “I should sue you for advertising false promises.”
“They’re all true.”
“Oh, please. This is bigger crap than what your damn baby goat left on your shoe!”
“Oh, is that our baby goat?” she asked Hailey, surprised.
“Just for a while, until I find it a home!” she piped up hastily.
Connor snorted. “This is a damn zoo! At least you got rid of your chicken.”
“Oh, no.” Hailey shook his head. “Eggsy is sleeping in the closet. She had a rough night.”
“Naturally,” he gritted his teeth. “Okay, that’s enough. I’ve had enough. We’re not a damn circus, and you have no right to harass my clients. I’m telling you one last time: Stop this nonsense or I’ll take legal action. A cease and desist order always does the trick.”
Visibly intimidated, Hailey shrugged and gnawed her lip. Rachel was familiar with this type of routine and could tell when someone was bluffing.
“You’re a real clown, aren’t you?” she asked. “You come in here, give us dirty looks, and throw big words around in the hopes that people will back down. Does that usually work for you?”
Connor slowly turned back to her, his eyes narrowed and his shoulders visibly stiff, stretching his suit jacket over his muscular back. “Yeah,” he said harshly. “Because people know I’m not joking.”
“Well, you don’t know me very well yet, but I don’t find this funny at all. Our agency works. We offer love at first click. Your clients should be happy that we approach them!”
“And you know that because you found your own Prince Charming with the help of your stupid questionnaire and algorithm?”
“No,” she said, gritting her teeth. Not yet. “But I’m a psychologist and a couples therapist, and I fucking created it. Hailey programmed the app, and she’s a fucking genius.”
“I am?” Hailey asked uncertainly.
“Yes!”
“Ah, yes, I am.” Hailey hastily tucked her black curls behind her ears. “Sorry, I forgot.”
“Seriously, you’re a couples therapist?” He raised a cool eyebrow. “Was the unicorn caretaker position filled?”
“No, but the working conditions were terrible. The stables were overflowing with all the crap you talk.”
He smiled mockingly. “Couples therapist. So, in a way, you’re my competition.”
“Why? Are you also a psychologist?”
“No, I’m a divorce lawyer.”
She gritted her teeth. “Right.”
“Yeah, where you fail, I excel!”
“I’m damn good at my job.” At least, she used to be back when she still recognized patterns!
“That doesn’t change the fact that one in two couples gets divorced.”
“Because people choose the wrong partners.”
“And you’re looking for the right one, right?”
“Yes. The perfect one.”
He snorted. “There’s no such thing as a perfect partner.”
“Probably not for you because you are already so imperfect. But for everyone else…?”
“Oh, please.” The tip of his shoes tapped hers, annoying her immensely.
She hated that he towered over her by almost a whole head.
Although at five-foot-eight, she really wasn’t short.
“No questions or algorithm can determine if someone has body chemistry, let alone that they will be happy together forever.”
“But it can increase the likelihood of long-term happiness.”
“Nonsense. No one can guarantee long-term happiness. You’re using the placebo effect.
People are so desperate to fall in love that they believe it works.
Christ, even I would be better than your damn algorithm at finding a woman to fall in love with and be happy with forever, if only I put in a little effort.
And my taste in women is crap. Ask everyone. ”
“I have no doubts,” Rachel snorted. “But you’ll never find a better match than Match Me! would for anyone else!”
His expression darkened…suddenly, there was a challenge in it. “Oh really? Want to bet?”
“Bet?”
“Yes. You’re single, aren’t you?”
She blinked. “Um, what makes you…”
“Your man-repelling vibe was a clue. So let’s make this interesting. You use your agency to find someone who will fall in love with you, and I’ll use my usual methods. The first person to find a steady partner who claims to be in love wins.”
For a few seconds, she stared at him in disbelief, her mouth gaping. “What?”
“You heard me.”
He looked frighteningly serious. “Your usual methods?”
“Yes.”
“What are your usual methods?”
He slowly leaned down to her and whispered, “I exist. That’s usually enough to attract women.”
“Oh my God. You’re the most arrogant guy in the world, aren’t you?”
“Possibly.” He jerked back up. “But I’m also the guy who never loses — and I will prove to you that your agency sucks.
I’ll tell you what: If you win, I’ll personally put your damn sign on the door of our office and tell every one of my clients to sign up with you.
Hell, I’ll even sign up myself. But if I win,” he said with a wolfish smile, “you’ll personally tell every new client that there’s a fifty percent chance they’ll break up with their partner. Or you move out. I don’t care which.”
Amused, Hailey laughed. “Come on, Connor. Don’t be silly! No one would agree to such a ridiculous – ”