5. Unwanted Memories
“Isaid that I rarely get angry, Alexandra, not never,” he corrected before growling, “Riley.”
Every one of us tensed.
I was tense because I knew what was coming, and judging by the way Atlas’s jaw kept tightening, I was beginning to worry he might actually grind his teeth into dust before this conversation was over.
Aster looked equally uncomfortable, though for entirely different reasons.
He knew Atlas too well not to recognize where this was heading, and unfortunately for me, he was also largely responsible for us heading there in the first place.
Across the table, Lazaros’s gaze moved between us, his expression grim and thoughtful. Unlike the rest of us, he wasn’t anticipating what might happen.
He already knew.
“What happened?” Atlas asked again through gritted teeth.
I shot Aster a look, and Atlas didn’t miss it, as he ordered,
“Look at me, not him… now, start talking.”
“He found me,” I said, my gaze dropping to the table between us because I couldn’t quite bring myself to look directly at Atlas.
“After you left, Riley found me as we were making our way back from the Rift. I thought he was… was fine at first, but then he…” My voice caught in my throat.
“…He wasn’t himself. He… he attacked me. ”
The change in Atlas was immediate. A low growl rumbled through the room, and when I finally forced myself to look up, every muscle in his body appeared rigid with tension.
The warmth that had softened his features earlier had vanished completely, replaced by something darker that made my stomach tighten.
“He did what?!” The words came out through clenched teeth as he hammered his fist down on the table, making me flinch as fine cracks branched out beneath his hand.
“What did he do?!” he practically snarled the question, and I flinched in my seat. I immediately looked towards Aster, silently willing him to rescue me from the conversation. He sighed and took a seat at the table, as though preparing himself for whatever came next.
“She survived, Atlas. That’s what matters,” he said carefully. “And it wasn’t Riley. Not really. The darkness had him. He was another victim of it.”
The words should have helped.
They didn’t.
Atlas’s hands remained planted firmly on the table, his fingers slowly curling against the wood until I heard it creak beneath the pressure.
Even more tiny splinters appeared beneath his grip, but he either didn’t notice or didn’t care.
His focus never left me, and there was something almost frightening in the intensity of his gaze.
I had seen that look before. It was the same look he wore when he changed that day in the woods.
The same barely restrained fury that always seemed to sit just beneath the surface, waiting for a reason to emerge.
“What did he do?” he repeated, his voice lower this time, more controlled, which somehow made it worse.
I released a slow breath and glanced briefly at Lazaros, who had gone unusually quiet. There was understanding in his expression, and guilt too, because I knew he recognized the story I was about to tell. Different circumstances, perhaps, but the same darkness. The same prison.
The same loss of control.
“As I said, we were traveling back from the Rift when we stopped to rest,” I began. “I wandered away from camp, and he found me.”
Atlas immediately looked to Aster, but before he could say a word, I got in there first.
“Before you say anything, no, it wasn’t Aster’s fault.”
His jaw tightened, though thankfully, he allowed me to continue. The glare he shot towards Aster suggested that particular conversation had merely been postponed until later.
“At first, he seemed normal. Strange, perhaps, but normal. Then I noticed the black veins beneath his skin, and he started talking about being enlightened. The more he spoke, the more everything felt wrong. Before I could react, shadows wrapped around me, and I lost consciousness. The next thing I knew, I woke up in a basement.”
Silence settled over the room once I finished speaking.
Atlas hadn’t moved a muscle.
Yet the longer I looked at him, the more obvious it became that he was struggling to keep control. His breathing had deepened, his shoulders were rigid with tension, and there was a dangerous stillness about him that worried me far more than if he had decided to vent his anger.
“Continue the story, Alexandra,” he seemed to force out, his voice controlled, though only just.
I released a slow breath and tried to organize the memories into something that resembled a coherent story.
“I woke up in a basement, and Riley was there. He kept insisting you were the enemy, that you wanted to use me, destroy our world, and somehow take over The?kós. None of it made any sense. The more he spoke, the more obvious it became that something wasn’t right.
I asked him about the darkness spreading through him, but he refused to answer.
Instead, he insisted nobody was controlling him, that everything he was doing was by choice. ”
I shook my head, hating that I was reliving it again.
“But I knew better. I know Riley, Atlas. Whatever was standing in front of me wasn’t really him. The veins beneath his skin, the way he spoke, the emptiness in his eyes. He wasn’t free… he was trapped inside himself.”
Across the table, Lazaros lowered his gaze, and there was a heaviness to his expression that hadn’t been there before. As though hearing the similarities laid out so plainly forced him to confront parts of his own experience he would rather avoid.
“Did he hurt you?”
I looked away as a single tear slipped free, but Atlas reached across the table and cupped my chin, gently forcing my face back towards him.
His gaze softened as he searched my eyes, and when another tear threatened to follow, he brushed the back of his knuckles down my cheek, catching it before it could fall.
“I will take that sorrow as my answer,” he said, and the quiet certainty in his voice made me swallow hard. His gaze shifted to Aster. “Tell me he was punished.”
Pain tightened in my chest so suddenly that I had to suck in a sharp breath.
“We got to her in time,” Aster replied, his expression darkening. “Bronte and I. After that, we returned him to the penitentiary and locked him back in the same cell he’d occupied before.”
“Good. Then I will deal with him when I return.” The words hit me like a physical blow. I gasped and instinctively pulled away from him, shaking my head before I had even fully processed the reaction.
“No... you won’t,” I gritted out.
“Alexandra.” The warning in his voice was clear, but I continued to shake my head, refusing to back down despite the dangerous look settling over his features.
“If you want someone to blame, then blame the only person responsible, the one who is still out there somewhere. But I would no more condemn your brother for what happened than I would condemn my best friend, so I only ask that you do the same.”
The words left me in a rush and judging by the way Atlas briefly closed his eyes, they hit exactly where I intended them to. When he opened them again, he released a slow breath.
“We will discuss this later.”
At that, I stood so abruptly that the chair scraped loudly across the stone floor, the sound echoing through the room.
“No, we won’t.” I hissed, and Atlas’s head snapped toward me. “If you disagree, then I will willingly walk out that door right now and not look back...” I continued, refusing to back down despite the warning already building in his expression.
“Sit back down, Alexandra, for my patience is running thin,” Atlas snapped, and I pushed away from the table.
“I’m serious, Atlas. This is not some royal judgment you can cast over my best friend. You’re not his king, and you’re not mine.”
His teeth clenched so hard that I saw the muscle in his jaw jump, and for a moment, he looked dangerously close to losing what little restraint he had left.
Neither of us moved. We just stared at one another across the table, both breathing too heavily.
Both too stubborn to look away, trapped in a silent standoff that made me wonder which one of us would break first.
It was him.
The second I took my first step away from the table, Atlas’s expression shifted.
“Fine,” he growled. “No harm will come to the boy.”
“And do I have your word on that?”
Atlas raised a furious brow. “Don’t push it, little bird,” he snapped. “If I say it, then my word is my vow.”
Relief washed through me so quickly that I nearly sagged with it. Whatever else happened today, whatever arguments still lay ahead of us in this impossible conversation, at least Riley was safe.
Slowly, I retook my seat. Atlas watched me do it, his expression remaining thunderous. The anger was still there, simmering dangerously close to the surface, but now that I was looking for it, I could see something else lurking beneath it too.
Fear. Not fear for himself.
Fear for me.
“Now, what happened next?”
At that, Aster scrubbed a large hand down his face, looking very much like a man who knew he was about to make things considerably worse.
“I took her to the prison to see him.”
Atlas’s head jerked back as though he’d physically misheard the words.
“You did what?” The dangerous calm in his voice lasted all of two seconds.
“Let me make sure I’ve understood this correctly.
” He leaned forward in his chair, fixing Aster with a stare that would have made most people flee the room.
“My second-in-command, the man I specifically charged with her safety, decided the best course of action was to take her directly to the same prison holding the asshole who dared lay a hand on my woman?!”
By the end of the sentence, the calm had vanished completely as the roar that followed echoed through the room.
Aster closed his eyes briefly.
“Yes,” he said with the patience of a man who had clearly already had this argument with himself several times. “And if I hadn’t done that, she never would have seen what she did.”