Chapter Twenty-Four The Promise #3
"I've seen what he's done to others. What he's capable of." His voice like smoke and steel. "If he gets into my mind, if he digs deep enough, he could use me to destroy everything we've built. You, the rebellion, Lymia. I can't allow that." He went to reach for her but thought better of it.
"If he realizes who you are, what you are, and he commands me to hurt you, I will not be able to stop him--stop myself."
Adan thought back to Nox's confession, his worst fear, being forced to kill the ones he loves.
"But you can, he can't get in your head.
And you have to live. You're the only one who might have a chance at killing him.
You're the one who has to survive this, no matter what.
She moved quickly, pushing hard at his chest.
To her surprise, he actually stumbled back.
"Fuck you, Nox. Why even bother kissing me if this is how it ends? What's the whole fucking point, then, huh?"
She looked up at him, tears clinging to the edges of her lashes but refusing to fall. "How am I supposed to live with that?"
Nox stood there, letting her shove him, letting her fury crash against him like waves against stone.
His chest rose and fell with the effort it took not to reach for her again.
Not to pull her into him and bury his face in her hair and pretend like this wasn't the end before the beginning had even begun.
Adan shook her head, breath catching on a sob that didn't quite make it out. She felt split open. "You shouldn't have kissed me," she whispered, her voice breaking. "You shouldn't have made me hope."
"I told you that I can't afford to get distracted right now... Fuck Adan, this is why... I will always put you first. Before my revenge, before my family, before my fucking self." his voice raw now.
None of the steel, none of the smoke—just the truth, bare and bleeding between them.
His words felt like a physical slap, they ripped her down the middle, the cruel, impossible logic behind them...
Gods, he was asking for too much. But then again, he always had.
Her eyes closed. Her jaw trembled as she clenched her teeth together, holding back the storm rising inside her.
"Because I'm the last Phoenix. Because I can keep Cias out of my head... it's bullshit! Fucking bullshit!" Adan stared at him, every inch of her trembling. Not with fear. Not with anger. But with the overwhelming pressure of love—the terrible, all-consuming kind that ruins you. "I won't. I can't."
"You won't even stop to think of what will happen to me if I am forced to take your life?" Anger seeped into his tone as his voice rose.
"You'll live!" She screamed in his face. Adan's hands clenched at her sides. She wanted to hit him again. She wanted to scream and rail and make him hurt the way she hurt.
He flinched—barely—but it was enough. Enough for her to see it, enough to know she'd landed a blow deeper than any blade could cut. "Live?" Nox echoed, like the word itself was poison. "You think that's living? Do you think I could breathe after that? After you?"
The silence that followed was shattering.
Adan's chest heaved, the air between them heavy and suffocating. "Then why are you asking me to survive it?"
"Because you can." His hands came up like he wanted to grab her, shake her, hold her—he didn't know which. He let them fall uselessly at his sides. "Because you're stronger than me. Because you've already survived more than anyone should."
Her lips curled in a snarl, grief, and fury warring in her eyes. "That's not fair."
"No," he said, softly this time, almost like a lullaby gone bitter. "It's not." They stared at each other, the Forge was silent around them now. "I kissed you," Nox said, quieter now, "because I couldn't die without knowing what it felt like."
"You idiot," she breathed, voice shaking, "you're planning to die, and you think that a kiss is enough for me?"
Nox gave a ghost of a smile. "It was never going to be enough."
She grabbed the front of his shirt in her fists, pulling him down until their foreheads pressed together. "You don't get to leave me like this," she whispered, her tears finally falling.
They stayed like that—two souls on the edge of ruin, tethered only by their fury and grief and the love neither of them had dared name until now.
Eventually, she spoke again, voice quieter than a fading ember.
"If it comes to it... if he turns you into something I don't recognize..." Her hands trembled. "I'll do what I have to." She pulled back enough to lock eyes with him. "But if it comes to that, I'll burn us both."
Nox let out a breath that sounded like surrender. He rested his forehead back against hers like it was the only thing anchoring him to this world.
"I'm sorry, Adan."
"Don't be," she whispered. "Just make sure you kiss me again before we die."
That startled a laugh out of him, broken and full of pain.
He kissed her then—not gentle this time, but hungry, desperate, like it might be the last.
And somewhere in the shadows of the Forge, the flames flickered and burned a little brighter, as if bearing witness to two warriors who loved like wildfire—knowing it might consume them in the end.