23
She bursts into tears. “I don't want you to hate me because—” she sucks in a deep breath. “---I married Zain! I married him! And now I can't be forced into the offering role,” she sniffles.
My brows knit together. “Why are you crying? That's a good thing! You're safe from their depravity. They can't touch you,” I reassure her. My hand rests against hers along the table. Her ruby ring shimmers in the sunlight. Even now, she looks out for me more than anyone else has in my life.
“He's my brother. My father’s death was no accident,” she whispers under her trembling breath.
Her words slap me across the face. “What?” I inch back against the seat. Tears sting her cheeks as she explains everything. The adoption. How Zain is her half-brother. Her father's role in all of this. Even Jax's death was at Zain's hand.
“Jesus Christ, Vesp. You carried this all on your shoulders?! I would never judge you. You can always tell me anything!” I jump up from my seat and crawl over into the booth with her. “We're going to figure it out. I promise,” I hug her tight.
Her lip quivers. “I'm so sorry. I should have been honest sooner. I promise we're figuring out a way to get you out of this.”
I blink a few times, processing. “So, if you are safe from being offered, what happens if I decline?”
She stammers. “I–I don't know. Zain and Kieran didn't say . . . ” she trails off.
I have already decided I won't be declining. Everyone has done so much on my behalf. I refuse to be a problem for anyone and I'll be damned if I lose this scholarship. It is not an option. Plus, this gets me one step closer to being somebody. I suppose any rational person would be petrified.
I drag my eyes up slowly, meeting hers. It's as if she already knows, reading my mind.
“What perks are there for accepting?”
Her face turns desiccated. “Clara . . . ”
She shakes her head. “Don't even think about it. You have no idea how perverted and turpitudinous these people are. I refuse to even speak to the Elites after learning about all this. They do unthinkable acts. They think women are here to serve. They have no morals.”
“What are the perks?” I ask again. My insides twist.
“You'll be passed around, compensated with money, clothes, and whatever you want. But it isn't worth it,” she pleads with her eyes.
My head is a jumbled mess trying to piece together why Kieran has taken an interest in me.
Is that why Kieran pierced me? Is he getting me ready to be passed around like a doll?
Is his curiosity nothing more than self-glorification?
He's using me as a playground for his atavistic needs.
He's his father’s son. The upper echelons of the Elites, proving himself worthy of the Voids command, focusing on his own vitiated need to be puissant.
Men like him are power hungry. I've seen it before. I know it all too well.
A few years prior.
“Clara?” A voice rips me from the numbness. “I'm done. You can go now.” His harsh, detached voice cuts through the silence.
I blink a few times and peer over to see Reed pulling his pants over his hips. I nod and pick myself up off the cold, hard floor gingerly. I'm sore. That's typical after Reed finishes with me, though. My clothes are thrown over one of the wingback chairs haphazardly.
Quickly, I dress, pocket my phone from his end table, and leave without another word.
This is my usual. Letting them use me for their own pleasure while chasing my own.
Sex serves its purpose. It's a distraction and sometimes even enjoyable, but I go to Reed for penance not pleasure.
It's a way to atone for my sins. If I had just been a better daughter. If I had helped Mama earlier.
Kieran never gave a fuck about me. Not that I assumed otherwise. His relentless pursuit is a voracious hunger. He's a beast. I see the way he looks at me. Like I'm his toy. At least I can do the one thing I'm good at to get ahead.