Chapter 26
VALENTINA
Late at night, I hear Luca downstairs.
He’s furious. Victor is with him. Their voices are muffled, but I recognize the anger. I feel it reverberating all the way up an upper floor. When something crashes, I’m startled, and I step out into the hallway, worried.
“I don’t fucking care, Victor! They’re all going to die by the time I’m done with them, each and every one of those motherfuckers!” Luca shouts.
My blood runs cold, and after the day I’ve had, the thoughts I’ve been fighting since I learned I was pregnant, I realize I cannot live like this. I’ve been hanging by a thread, vacillating between should I or shouldn’t I? My reasoning is sound, but my heart keeps getting in the way.
Tonight, however, these sounds of wrath and violence are too much.
With a heavy heart, I go back to Michael’s room and start packing his bag.
He’s sound asleep, and I know the security detail’s movements in and around the mansion by now.
I know where the cameras are; I’m aware of the dead angles and how I can leave here—at least physically.
Emotionally, it will be a different issue altogether.
Victor texts me.
You might want to stay in Michael’s room tonight, he writes. Luca is dealing with a few things.
Oh, I can hear him, I reply. Pretend I’m already asleep. I’m locking the door.
Luca’s voice rises again, like thunder trapped between the brick walls of the mansion. My stomach tightens as I lock the door and fill a duffel bag with a handful of clothes and essentials for my boy and me. I’ll get more stuff once we’re out of here.
I don’t want Michael raised in this life. I don’t want to live constantly looking over my shoulder, worried someone is going to kill me or my stepfather will try to take my son away from me. This isn’t the life I imagined for myself.
My heart bleeds when I take my phone out again and call Caroline.
“Valentina,” she picks up with a worried voice. “What’s going on? Are you okay?”
“Not really,” I say. “I need your help.”
“What happened?”
“Can you get me out of here?”
The longest pause follows. I listen to the argument still unfolding downstairs. It’s a miracle Michael didn’t wake up from all the ruckus. My stepsister is the only one I can call to help me with this. Victor would find a way to convince me to stay, but I don’t think I can stay anymore.
I have another baby coming. My children deserve peace and safety.
I’ll get out of Illinois altogether, if I have to.
“Are you sure about this, Valentina?” Caroline asks.
“Yes. I can’t stay here anymore; it’s not safe.”
“Okay, I think I can help, but I can’t get you out of the mansion itself. Can you make it out to the southeast corner? North Sheridan?”
“I can. I just need about an hour before it’s quiet enough for me to move,” I reply. “I know the guards’ movements. I’ll just wait for Victor to leave and for Luca to… I don’t know, brood in silence.”
“Have you spoken to him at all today?”
“No. We had a huge fight yesterday, and I was hoping we’d maybe talk about it today, but by the sound of it…”
“Right. No, I get it,” she says, and I hear the sadness in her tone.
I gaze out the window, the night sprawling lazily over the neighborhood with its elegant houses and lush greenery and sloping roofs reflecting the moonlight. Stars twinkle over the horizon, out of the moon’s reach. My heart beats a little louder at the thought of leaving this place behind.
But enough people have died on my account, and Luca isn’t slowing down. My presence has caused nothing but strife. Maybe if I remove myself from the equation, everyone will get the closest thing there is to peace.
“Give me an hour?”
“Let’s make it midnight,” she says. “I’m guessing your security detail changes every twelve hours.”
“That’s right.”
“Midnight and noon. That’s the usual system.”
“Yes.”
Caroline takes a deep breath, and I hear the sharp exhale over the phone. “Alright. Then wait until three minutes to midnight. That’s when the guys meet up and do the shift change. They’ll be briefly distracted. What about cameras? Motion sensors?”
“I know which way to go and how to avoid them,” I reply. “I’ve been here long enough to figure it out. I was just hoping I wouldn’t have to do this.”
“I get it. But don’t worry; I’m here. I couldn’t protect you before, but I can try to do better now. Silence your phone, but keep it on. Watch for my texts. And I’ll see you at midnight at the corner of North Sheridan.”
“Thank you, Caroline.”
“Don’t sweat it.”
At three minutes to midnight, I’m carrying Michael, half asleep in my arms, and the duffel bag on my shoulder as I sneak out of my room. It’s quiet now. Victor left about thirty minutes ago. I watched his car disappear into the night, the wrought iron gates closing behind him.
The staff has all gone to bed, except the security detail.
They’re gathered downstairs in the kitchen, going over their checkpoint list before the night shift takes over.
I have a few minutes to move freely, just like Caroline said.
I remember a similar pattern at the Mancuso mansion, though I did bribe one of the boys to look the other way when I left that night.
“Where’s the boss?” one of the guards asks.
“Still in his office. Don’t disturb him unless he wants something, and if he wants something—”
“He’ll ask for it or get it himself. Yeah, I know the drill.”
My soul hurts as I sneak through the ground floor and make my way across the breakfast room.
I’m light-footed and fast as I reach the garden door, careful to check the camera’s angle on the terrace since it moves on a preset line.
When it reaches the blind spot, I unlock the door and dash through the garden as fast as I can with my son and our meager belongings, my pulse quickening as I leave the mansion behind.
Michael mumbles something as he’s jostled on my hip.
“Shush, baby, we’re on a secret mission,” I whisper, hoping it’s enough to keep him quiet while I navigate the gardens.
Out here, there are motion sensors and motion-activated cameras, but I’ve learned the layout well enough to know which way to move.
A swerve to the right, a few steps forward, a left turn and a run around the fountain before I go anywhere close to the fence.
That’s enough to cover my trail and keep us out of anyone’s sight.
By the time I reach the back gate, the security guards are making their way out of the house, ready to go on their first patrol of the night shift, which means I have less than a minute to get out.
With trembling hands, I pull the gate key out of my pocket.
I swiped it from Susie earlier tonight.
“Mama?” Michael fully wakes up, suddenly confused as he looks up at me with sleepy, glassy eyes.
“It’s okay, honey,” I say and motion for him to be quiet. “We’re almost there.”
I hear the footsteps. It’s a guard coming closer. He can’t see us or the gate from where he’s standing, but I know he’ll be here soon. Finally, I unlock the gate and slip out, making sure to lock it behind us before I run down the street.
“Mama,” Michael whines, but I kiss the top of his head and keep moving, staying in the deep shadow of the fence that runs along the Petrucci property.
“Almost there,” I whisper.
There’s not a single soul out on these streets at this late hour. The moon shines above, big and round and pearly, watching me as I leave the closest thing I’ve ever had to true love behind.
Upon reaching North Sheridan, I look around, nervous with every passing minute, as I try to figure out where Caroline might be. Several cars are parked around the corner, but it’s not until one of them flashes their headlights at me that I can move with certainty again.
“Oh, you got a car seat, too,” I exclaim when Caroline gets out and opens the back door, where Michael’s safe spot awaits.
“Of course,” she replies.
I kiss Michael’s forehead again, then strap him in and get in the passenger seat, while Caroline makes sure the car is secured before she takes the wheel.
“I’m okay,” I tell her.
“You’re alive, yes,” she says. “But you’re not okay.”
It only takes a minute for the tears to fight their way to the surface. The full impact of what I’ve done crashes into me, hard and merciless, as I start crying my heart out. She reaches over and takes me in her arms, holding me close as I let the pain wash over me.
“Oh, I’m so sorry, Valentina,” Caroline says.
“It’s better this way,” I manage between sobs. “It’s better for everyone. Nobody has to fight over me and Michael anymore.”
“You don’t deserve any of this; you never did.”
“I love him, you know?”
Caroline pulls back, looking slightly confused. “Luca, you mean?”
“Yes. It’s killing me to do this.”
“I know it can’t be easy, and I’m the last person to tell you this, but I think you’re doing the right thing to protect your son. I wish I could do more to help you.”
I shake my head slowly. “You’re already doing so much. You don’t want any of the blowback because Luca will turn this city upside down until he finds me. Just drop us somewhere and go.”
Once we’re driving, I find a sense of calm and clarity.
Maybe it’s the city lights or the practically nonexistent traffic, maybe it’s the subtle rumble of the car’s engine, or just my heart beating in pain, not the fear of dying before I see my son grow up, of getting caught while leaving everything behind, of seeing Luca and changing my mind.
“Had it not been for the fact that I haven’t seen him since yesterday, I don’t think I would’ve found the courage to leave,” I tell Caroline.
“He would’ve convinced you to stay.”
“He wouldn’t even have to do anything, I’d just stay.” I sigh deeply. “I don’t know how to explain it.”
“I do. You said it yourself.” She pauses, and I give her a sideways glance. “It’s love, Valentina. It’s that simple.”
I sigh again, relaxing into the warm seat. Michael is back in dreamland for now. He’ll get another jostle when I move him from the car to the motel room, but maybe he’ll be in deep sleep and won’t feel a thing.
“Simple yet so goddamn complicated at the same time. I can’t live like this.”
“I completely understand,” she says, her eyes on the road.
We pull up outside a motel. A neon sign hangs above the entrance, glowing in pink and yellow.
Another sign below announces they still have a few rooms available.
I can see inside from here—a night clerk dozing off behind the reception desk, a TV on in the background.
I turn my phone off and slip it into my pocket, then check my wallet for cash.
Caroline slips me an envelope. “Don’t use your cards yet, not in this area anyway. Use this.”
“Oh, Caroline, I can’t—”
“You kind of have to if you want to stay under the radar,” she reminds me. “Luca will freeze your cards, at least the ones he got you. Do you still have your personal debit card? You used to have one.”
I nod slowly. “Yes.”
“Use that, but don’t use any of the ATMs in the area.
Hop in a cab or use the metro line or bus line.
Go at least a couple of neighborhoods east of here for any cash withdrawals.
It will throw them off your trail. And don’t stay at this motel for too long either.
Two nights tops,” she adds. “Then find another. Keep moving.”
“I can’t thank you enough,” I mumble and look in the envelope, the blood draining from my face at the sight of so many hundred-dollar bills. “Oh, my God, this is too much.”
“You’ll need it if you want to leave the state before he finds you. He’s found you before, Valentina.”
“Caroline…”
She smiles softly and caresses my cheek. “I haven’t been the best sister to you, but this is my opportunity to do better. Oh, also take this,” she says and gives me a burner cell. “It’s got my number saved in there. We can keep this line open.”
“We will; I promise.”
“And remember, use cash only. Once you’re in another state, you can pick yourself up, start from scratch. I’d go to Michigan if I were you. Plenty of small towns for you and Michael to disappear into.”
It sounds so sad and final, it breaks me open and I start crying again. Caroline holds me close and stays with me until I’m calm and composed enough to get out of her car and get us checked in.