Chapter 17 She’s Light #2
“Why? You’re already attached to them.”
I don’t want to open room in my life for someone who might end up miserable because of one of my choices or mistakes. I’d rather be their coach. They’re my athletes. If I care about them and something happens to them, I spiral. Selfish, I know, but…I’d rather keep it that way.
When I don’t say anything, he continues. “Fine, keep lying to yourself. I don’t know much about it,” Liam adds, “but her file says it was some kind of tragedy a few years ago. And that certain things can trigger her—loud noises, alarms.”
“Interesting,” I mutter. “I really hope we never have a drill at the rink while she’s there.”
“There’s instructions on what to do,” he says. “Who to call if something happens.”
“And who’s that girl who brings her to practice?”
He shrugs. “I’m not sure, but not her mom.”
We hop into his Jeep and head toward Magnolia Springs, driving down the dark stretch of road in between.
“Oh, good, they’re here!” Aspen shouts, holding a tiny baby Calla to his chest as he opens the door and ushers us into Oliver’s house.
He’s holding Mateo’s tiny baby in one huge hand—carelessly careful, if that makes any sense.
Aspen is an absolute menace with adults, but with kids?
The guy turns into some kind of giant teddy bear with superpowers.
He’s got Calla’s head supported perfectly, bouncing her lightly so it doesn’t wobble.
Mateo’s the sports manager for the hockey team Liam and I used to play for.
Daisy has been his best friend his whole life, and a few years ago, they finally got their heads out of their asses and confessed their feelings.
Now, they have this little bundle of joy Aspen is cradling like he was born to do it.
Daisy is tucked against Mateo’s side on the giant beige sectional, looking exhausted but so damn happy.
Oliver and Liam went to school together. When I became friends with Liam, I became friends with Oliver by association. Same with his brother Lucas. They have an older brother, Dom, but he lives up in Tennessee, on a ranch somewhere in the mountains.
Magnolia Springs might be a small town, but the population has exploded in the last few years, making it feel almost chaotic as a big city sometimes. Dom hates that, so he stays gone.
Lucas and Oliver are standing by the kitchen table, both looking stressed.
“Who died?” Liam asks, kissing Calla’s head before settling in a recliner next to Aspen.
“That’s what I asked too,” Aspen says.
“Boys,” Daisy hisses, “you’re going to wake her up.”
“No, I’m not,” Aspen says. “I’m the baby whisperer. Don’t you know that?” He points at Liam and Oliver. “These two know.”
Oliver’s kid, Stella, is six years old—the absolute love of his life. Her mom passed during childbirth, so he’s been raising her alone ever since. The guy is a saint. Still won’t date. Puts all his energy into Stella and baseball, which he plays professionally.
But right now, he looks shaken.
I take a seat at Daisy’s feet, letting her drop them onto my lap. “Alright,” I say. “Can someone tell me what’s going on?”
“There’s something going on with Stella,” Oliver says.
“Nothing is wrong with her,” Lucas mutters, hood up, baseball cap backwards, staring at his phone. “I already told you.”
Aspen opens his mouth, but I hold up a hand. “Not you.”
Oliver lets out a long breath. “I got a call from Stella’s school before the end of the year. They said she won’t stop crying in class. So I brought it up to her counselor. One thing led to another, and…we think she has a learning disability.”
“Oh.” I lean back. “Have you gotten her tested yet?”
“That’s what I asked,” Aspen chimes in.
Oliver narrows his eyes at him. “We’re waiting for the appointment.”
“Okay,” I say. “Then what’s the problem?”
“There’s nothing wrong with her,” Lucas says again. “Just means she learns differently.”
“Exactly,” I say. “She has us. She’s got support.”
Aspen smacks my arm. “Dude, that’s what I said!”
I roll my eyes. “Great. I’m on the same page as Aspen. For once.”
Oliver runs a hand through his hair. “I’m just…worried. I barely have time as it is, and now there’s something else, and I don’t want to screw this up.”
“That’s understandable,” Daisy says gently. “But a disability doesn’t mean something is wrong. It means something is different. Once she’s tested, we’ll know how to help her.”
Lucas looks up from his phone for the first time. “The internet is no help. There are a hundred possibilities from what you described.”
“Right,” Mateo adds. “We’re not googling anything. We’re waiting for the professionals.”
“Whatever she needs,” I say, “I can help. My schedule’s flexible, especially now.” I glance at the baby and smile. “And I like having an excuse to hang out with her.”
Aspen snorts. “Yeah, right. Like you’re gonna hang out with a child.”
“I can hang out with kids,” I say defensively. “I’m good with kids.”
Liam shrugs. “He actually is. It’s been a long time since I’ve seen him this happy. Those girls he coaches make him really happy.”
“Thanks, bud.”
Aspen smirks. “Are you sure it’s the girls he’s coaching? Or is it the girl he’s seeing?”
All heads whip toward me.
I am going to fucking kill him.
“What?” Daisy sits up. “You’re seeing someone?”
“I’m not seeing anyone.”
Aspen sings, “He’s got a giiiiiiirllfriend.”
“I do not have a girlfriend!”
Daisy folds her arms. “Have you ever had a girlfriend?”
I sigh. I went from nerdy high school kid with glasses to suddenly growing into my body in my senior year. Then, I played hockey through college and in the NHL. And during that whole time, I was…well, busy trying to stay on the damn team. And then my whole family died.
I shake my head.
“You’ve never had a girlfriend?” Lucas asks.
“Have you ever seen me with a girlfriend?” I shoot back.
“I mean, no,” he says. “But I met you after you already became all grumpy and shit.”
“I’m not grumpy.” I point to Liam. “Nope. That over there? Grumpy as hell.”
“Even he,” Aspen adds, gesturing to Liam, “had a wife.”
Liam groans. The living room glows with soft amber light, like a bubble in the dark night. Toys are scattered like tiny landmines across the carpet. A half-built block tower leans drunkenly near the coffee table. The air smells faintly of vanilla candles and leftover dinner and family.
The family we’ve built. They deserve for me to be honest.
“I don’t have a girlfriend right now,” I say quietly, sinking into the couch cushion that dips too low, thinking about Natalie.
I wouldn’t call her a girlfriend or anything like that, but I am spending a lot of time with her, and I like it.
I like her, and it’s been a while since I liked spending this much time with anyone.
Across from me, the baby lets out one of those trembling half-cries—small sounds that come from deep in her chest as Aspen rocks her little body back and forth. Her fists open and close like she’s trying to grab hold of something.
“It’s okay,” Daisy murmurs gently. “I can take her.”
“Don’t take my baby away from me,” Aspen replies. “Let me hold her. It’s fine.”
“You were saying?” Liam asks with his knowing smile.
I try to say something, but this time, Calla wails. So she also doesn’t want me to say anything. Good Calla girl, saving me from the interrogation.
“Just give her to me. I’ll give her back after I feed her.” Daisy moves, and I take it as an opportunity to get up and go to Oliver.
“Do you have any idea what they’re worried about?”
A sigh drifts from Oliver’s mouth. “There are a few things.”
“Stuff we can work on,” I add. “As soon as you know more, the center can help once she’s ready. And Julia—she’ll talk to you when the time’s right.”
“We’re not there yet.”
“But we’ll get there,” Lucas adds.
“She’s struggling so much. She’s so little. All she wants is to do well in school. But even that is hard. She tries so hard, and she still…she’s drowning. It’s not fair.”
The dim light shimmers on the framed photos lining the bookshelf—faces caught in happier moments, but the one that catches my attention is the one of Sol, Stella’s mom, smiling so bright at her baby shower. Oliver follows my gaze.
“I know, buddy.”
“I know you do,” he adds, looking my way, a silent understanding of knowing loss like ours. Not his parents but mine, not my spouse but his.
Lucas bumps Oliver’s shoulder with his elbow and gives him an easy, knowing smile.
“She’s got a good heart,” Lucas says. “Great grandparents and a great dad. You’ll figure it out.”
I let out a tired huff that almost passes for a laugh. “Where is Stella, anyway?” I look at Liam. “Where are your kids?”
We’ve been talking so deeply about Stella, I completely forgot there should be three extra children roaming around, other than baby Calla, but I don’t see anyone.
Before anyone can answer, the front door swings open. Moist summer air rushes in as tiny bodies tumble through in a flurry of giggles. One barrels straight toward Lucas. He scoops her up without missing a beat.
“Tio Lucas!” Stella shouts as Amelia rushes to Liam. Behind them, Joe, Liam’s dad, steps in with Elijah perched on his hip.
“Well, well,” he says with a grin as the door falls shut behind him. “The whole squad is here tonight.” He bounces the baby. “Stella and Amelia insisted they needed at least five minutes to show off their princess dresses.”
Stella slips free from Oliver and runs to me. She hugs my leg with all the fierceness in her little body.
“I’m growing strong,” she declares.
A real laugh escapes me this time. I scoop both girls up by their waists, and their delighted squeals burst into the warm, glowing room. I whirl them around like rockets, making whooshing sounds as they ‘fly’ above the carpet.
Their dresses flare out like tiny petals spinning in the lamplight, and for a moment, everything feels lighter. All worries disappear, and I’m Uncle Holden, dancing with my princesses.
“You’re not supposed to grow this much, girls,” I mutter under my breath.