CHAPTER 10
NOVA
Tingling warmth spreads from my belly with every heartbeat. Fucking hell, it feels amazing being full of his eggs.
Especially when he rubs my body down with hot washcloths, then smooths a fragrant, floral oil over my skin.
I still can’t move. Or, well… I could. If I really, really wanted to. But why bother? The moment I feel any discomfort from being in one position too long, Zyren’s hands are already on me, kneading the soreness away and repositioning me.
Once I’m clean and dry, he settles me in another nest of blankets near a broad wooden desk.
Sleep finds me more easily than it ever has. My body is totally at peace. When I stir hours later, I feel refreshed in a way I haven’t for a long, long time. My mind doesn’t need to work to tune out the pain, the ache.
I can just… be.
My body is lazy and sluggish, too comfortable to move, and my mind is placid, yet lucid. Every breath shifts the eggs in my belly, and it feels so good. That tingling heat drips down, settling between my legs, but I still can’t do anything about it.
So I just… relax. Bask in the pleasure.
Zyren stands over me, laser-focused on his workbench. His quick, nimble hands dice herbs and carefully wrap them in filter paper, then set the bundle into a complex glass apparatus.
As I lie there peacefully, I trace the tubes, running through my knowledge of chemistry.
He’s first soaking the herb in hot solvent to dissolve its various compounds, then distilling the resulting infusion.
The various components separate, each with its own temperature of condensation in the distillation column, and he collects the different-colored liquids into tiny bottles.
Desire pulses warm in my core.
I always did have a thing for competence.
Zyren’s wings vibrate for a moment, then he tucks them back and resumes his work.
My eyes drift down his body, mesmerized by the black shapes adorning his arms and his abdomen.
His insectoid half is so much more flexible and agile than I’d expected.
The chitin plates that line his abdomen slide over each other, making his stripes wider and shorter as they move in hypnotizing patterns.
The reason for his abdomen’s flexing soon becomes clear—the blunt tip of his cock peeks out, already dripping.
Heat flashes through me.
Zyren pauses, setting his mortar and pestle aside.
His dark gaze falls on me, as if accusing me of this distraction.
I’m not sure if that’s what’s happening, or what I want to be happening. I want to be his distraction and the source of his release; I want to be a thing he uses for his pleasure; I want—
Suddenly Zyren is on top of me, the thick head of his cock aligning with my entrance again.
I cry out in eager pleasure as he shoves inside, and the movement ripples through my heavy eggs. His cock settles deep, and every thrust grinds that innermost spot of pleasure against the weight of the eggs from above.
The knowledge that I can’t cum in this state is both a salve and a torment. I crave it desperately as my body fills with hot pleasure, and yet, if I can’t cum, this will last as long as possible.
Zyren fucks me hard and fast, soon growling his climax against my ear. I love the way his abdomen spasms, stripes shifting with every rush of heat.
And I love how he cradles my cheek, kissing my forehead before returning to his work, leaving his cum slowly draining out of me.
He uses me several more times over the coming hours, each as intensely pleasurable as the last. I float in a horny haze, fantasizing about all the other things Zyren might do to me, until he inevitably returns and pumps me full of cum again.
When the sun dims on the other side of the windows, Zyren tidies up his workbench. Then he falls over me again, fucking me slow and deep this time, savoring it.
Kisses and nibbles fall along my jaw and neck, urgent and hungry, like he needs them more than I do.
His teeth graze my ear, and my breath shakes as electric tingling spreads down my spine.
“You make it very hard to focus,” he breathes. “Smelling how you do. Looking how you do. Sounding how you do…” His tongue slides along my throat.
I whimper. “How is… that?”
Zyren moans, thrusting deeper. His massive cock throbs inside me, the shaft thick enough to offer a delicious stretch.
“Full of my eggs…” His fingers dig into my hips.
“So soft. All your little sighs. So ready when I thrust my cock into you, so eager to be used…” His breath catches. “You have no idea what you do to me.”
The pleasure radiating from my core blanks out my mind. Tears spill from my eyes, and Zyren’s brow furrows with concern as he brushes them away.
He doesn’t stop his thrusting—can’t stop.
“Zyren, I’m… I’m so happy…”
A hot, ragged breath washes over me, then Zyren’s mouth claims mine again, tongue sliding deep. I moan, aching for climax, but happy to just be here.
Zyren kisses me until he climaxes again. Like when my body matches his breathing, so too my pleasure peaks with his, enraptured in pleasant warmth and relaxing into contentment again.
“I’m sorry to leave you wanting,” he murmurs in my ear.
I moan as the thick bulb of his cock catches on my entrance, tugging before sliding out.
“I don’t want,” I murmur back. If I could lift my arm, I’d touch his cheek.
Zyren’s arms slide around me, cradling me to his chest. He lifts me, and I moan at the shifting pressure in my belly. Fuck, it all feels so good.
If the price I have to pay for this is some hours of pain in a hot spring and an edging kink… I can work with that.
No matter how heavy my body becomes, Zyren has no issue carrying me, and he gently pulls together another nest of blankets for me in the kitchen, tucking me there. I snuggle my cheek into the pillow he placed under it.
“When will I be able to move again?”
His hand slides over my belly. “The venom’s effects will remain until you’re empty. It surrounds the eggs, absorbing slowly into the rest of your body. So, whatever you need or want, you must tell me. Don’t think you’ll have success hiding anything from me.”
“The venom made me so desperate before, though… this is different…”
“It made you desperate for my eggs,” Zyren answers quietly. “Now that you have them, you need only peacefully incubate them.”
“Oh…” The thought makes happiness bloom through my brain. It’s strange to feel this good and this lucid. I’m sure I’ll remember all this clearly, which isn’t something I can say about any other drug.
“Let me get you more food.”
“I’m not hungry…”
“The venom would have you starve to death. You’ll still be able to eat, albeit only a little at a time.”
“Hm…” As I sluggishly contemplate this, Zyren returns shortly with a wooden bowl of fruit and seeds.
He feeds me patiently, piece by piece, wiping my lip with his thumb whenever juice threatens to escape.
“Sorry,” I murmur between bites.
Zyren blinks at me. “What for?”
“This has to be terribly boring…”
His gaze is intense as he grips my chin. “Nova. There is nothing I would rather be doing right now.”
Emotion rises in my chest, then gently dissipates. “Oh…”
I sink deeper into contentment as Zyren continues feeding me. When my stomach feels full, he lets me stop, assuring me I’ll be ready for more food again soon.
“When will you need to milk me again?”
“Eventually. The venom will slow the development of your milk.”
“Oh…”
Zyren raises a brow. “You sound disappointed.”
“It feels good,” I whine. I’d be embarrassed of being so petulant, if not for Zyren’s warm hand landing on my cheek.
“I know, little lamb. I’ll treat you to a milking when you’re ready. You won’t have to wait as long as for the eggs.”
Zyren holds something warm to my lips, and the aroma of coffee hits my nose. The warm, comforting flavor spreads across my tongue, and I sigh with happiness as Zyren patiently holds the wooden mug there, tipping it slightly more with each sip.
When the mug is empty, Zyren lies on the pillow next to me. His abdomen and legs curl protectively over me, and his chitin is surprisingly warm and smooth. He strokes my hair with his hands, humming quietly.
Sleep tempts me, and I can’t tell whether it’s the coffee or a certain question that keeps me awake.
“Zyren, can I ask you something?”
“Anything.”
“Why do you enjoy this?”
“Enjoy what?”
“…Taking care of me?”
Zyren cradles my cheek, gaze meeting mine. “Why wouldn’t I?” His expression is confused, and I feel the presence of his mind against mine. It’s like the contract, only gentler. I relax into it, enjoying the ghostly sensation as he methodically probes my mind.
He touches something tender, and tears well in my eyes. Before I even understand what’s happening, Zyren speaks with simple, complete authority.
“Nova, you are worth taking care of.”
It’s as if a muscle knot deep in my soul releases. Tension I didn’t realize I was holding finally unwinds. Tears stream down my cheeks, and Zyren catches every one, brushing them away. I can’t hide my face, can’t turn away.
“You feel safe when you feel useful,” Zyren explains. “Helping you feel safe is an important part of taking care of you. But even if you never produce another drop of milk, never carry another egg…” His warm palms cup my face. “I will never stop taking care of you.”
Fresh tears spring from my eyes, and Zyren pulls me across his chest. My motivation to move overcomes the venom’s effect, and my arms close around his neck, holding tight.
Gentle hands rub my back and stroke my hair.
“I’m too difficult,” I sob, suddenly in the throes of old anxieties. “Nothing works. It’s not worth it.”
Zyren grips my chin again, forcing me to meet his gaze. “Nova, you are not too difficult for me. You will never be too difficult for me.”
I try, then fail, to hide my face.
Zyren’s grip tightens. “Do you understand, Nova?”
“I understand…”
His palm cups my cheek. “Do you believe me?”
A wave of tears pools between his fingers. I can’t lie to him.
“No,” I breathe.
Zyren just takes a calm breath and presses his forehead against mine. The sensation of his mind returns—then expands. His presence surrounds my consciousness with a gentle, persistent warmth, just like at the hot springs.
I can breathe deeply again.
My anxieties unravel.
It’s so overwhelmingly good, I can’t stand it. I can’t trust it.
Zyren just holds me and breathes. Slowly, my mind and body surrender to the intensity, just as they have every time under his care.
Then, finally… I believe him.
My arms tighten around his neck.
I begin to fully understand what this life with him is going to be.
Not just an end to my pain, but also the beginning of something new. Something intense and frightening, yet… perfect.
Zyren senses the change in my mental state and kisses my forehead. “Good girl. I will remind you of this anytime you need. Do you understand?”
“Yes…”
He catches my chin and my gaze again. “Do you believe me?”
The sweetest warmth yet blossoms through my chest as I answer with the truth. “Yes.”