The Husband I Can’t Let Go (The Brodys of Whiskey Run #4)

CHAPTER 1 PENN

PENN

I can’t be late. Not again.

I lift my arm to look at the watch on my wrist as I jog toward the restaurant. “Fuck,” I grunt. It’s even later than I thought. I can already picture the look on Aria’s face. She’s going to be hurt, disappointed, and embarrassed… again.

I can’t keep doing this to her.

I walk into the restaurant, and the owner points toward the back. He knows who I am because I performed surgery on his wife last year. “How’s Cecilia?” I ask, out of breath.

The man nods as he rushes me toward the back. “Good. Good. Thanks to you. Now hurry. They’re about to cut the cake.”

I run a hand through my hair as I follow him. Fuck, the party is almost over.

As soon as I walk into the room, my eyes go straight to Aria. She has that fake smile on her face again. The one I’ve been seeing too much lately.

She’s upset, and I don’t blame her.

I walk straight to her, bypassing my family, and lean down to press my lips to her forehead. “Sorry,” I whisper.

When I lean back, her eyes don’t quite meet mine. “You should probably apologize to your sister too.”

I nod and look across the room at Skyler. She has a worried look on her face, and I force a smile. We’re supposed to be happy, and the last thing I want to do is ruin my sister’s baby shower.

I walk toward her, ignoring the dirty look Zach is giving me. Not that I blame him. He’s protective, and he doesn’t like anyone upsetting her. I can appreciate that.

I lean over and hug Skyler. “Hey, sis. Sorry I’m late. A surgery ran over.”

She’s usually forgiving, but not today. Under her breath, she mutters, “You should apologize to your wife.”

I nod. “I did.”

Her gaze burns into me, and I know she’s mad. More and more lately, I’ve been showing up late, missing family dinners, and there’s no doubt my family is starting to question it all.

I gesture toward where Aria is sitting. “I’m going to have a seat.”

As I walk across the room, I don’t miss the stares from my family.

Ozzy is shaking his head at me, and I know exactly what he’s thinking.

His wife passed away a few years ago, and I’ve heard him say it enough times that I can hear his voice in my head now.

You need to be thankful for what you have.

Don’t take it for granted. And then the other one.

You never know when it’s all going to end.

Just thinking about losing Aria makes my chest tighten.

Bree, Logan’s wife and my sister-in-law, lifts her eyebrows at me, and Logan does the same. It seems I’ve pissed off my whole family by being late.

I sit down next to Aria and put an arm around the back of her chair. She tenses, and it feels like a punch to the gut. She’s always curled into me when I touch her, but today is different. I can’t say I blame her after the argument we had last night.

I pull my arm back and reach for her hand instead, threading our fingers together. “Hey,” I whisper.

She’s smiling, but I can only imagine how hard it is for her to fake it. “What?” she whispers back.

I pull our hands up and press my lips to her soft skin. “I’m sorry. I really tried to be here on time.”

She looks at me, still smiling because everyone around us is watching. Then she leans closer. “You really think I’m mad because you’re late? You’re a doctor, and you save lives. I understand that.” She blows out a breath. “What I don’t understand is why you’re pulling away from me.”

I look into her big brown eyes, and the hurt there nearly takes me out. I’ve fucked up, and I don’t know how to fix it. Not without losing her, and that’s not an option.

I squeeze her hand. “I love you, Aria.”

She pulls her hand from mine. “Can we talk about this later?”

All I can do is stare at her.

Never in all our years of marriage has she pulled away from me. She’s always the first one to forgive, and she hates any kind of conflict. Usually, I can smooth things over, but I’m not sure I’ll be able to this time. I nod and focus on what’s happening in front of us.

Ignoring the looks from my mom, dad, and everyone else, I turn in my seat so I’m facing my wife. Someone puts a plate with a slice of cake in my hands, but I set it on the table beside us. “How was your day?”

She shrugs and picks up a plate with half-eaten cake on it. “Fine.”

I frown at her. “Fine? Just fine?”

Aria always has a story to tell about her day at work. As a physical therapist at the hospital, she meets all kinds of patients, and she usually has something interesting to tell me.

She shrugs again. “Yeah, nothing special today. How was your surgery?”

“Good.” I let out a breath. “I really am sorry.”

She looks around us, and when she sees everyone is busy talking to each other, she tilts her head. “Sorry for being late or sorry for this brick wall you’ve put between us?”

I lean back in my chair, my guard going up immediately.

She’s right. Of course she is. I have put a wall between us, but I can’t tell her the truth because I know I’ll lose her.

“I’ll do better,” I promise her.

She rolls her eyes. “I’ve heard that too many times to believe it, Penn.”

I grab her hand, needing to feel her touch. “Please, don’t give up on me. I’m begging you, Aria.”

One of Skyler’s friends sitting close to us gasps, staring at Aria and me like we’re the entertainment.

At the front of the room, Zach stands and hands Skyler another present to open. There are oohs and aahs around us, and Aria leans in closer. “You missed dinner. Do you want me to order you something?”

Even when she’s mad, she tries to take care of me, and guilt settles heavily in my chest. If she knew the truth, she wouldn’t care about me like she does.

I shake my head. “I’m fine. I ate a sandwich late this afternoon.”

Aria’s smile is soft, but it doesn’t reach her eyes. Her fingers twist together in her lap, and I know that look because I’ve seen it too much lately.

I want to fix it. I want to take her away from all of this and spend a week with no calls from the hospital and no one asking us about babies. Maybe then I could remind her how much I love her.

But being alone with her for that long would mean talking. Really talking.

And once I tell her what I’ve been hiding from her for the last year and a half, there will be no taking it back.

“What do you say, Penn?”

Zach’s voice cuts through the room, and I blink, realizing every eye has shifted to me.

Aria goes still beside me.

I clear my throat. “Sorry. I missed that. What did you say?”

Zach grins and gestures between me and Aria. “What about you two? When are you going to add to the family?”

Everyone is smiling at us, waiting like we might make some kind of announcement.

I force a laugh past the lump in my throat and reach for Aria’s hand beneath the table. Her fingers are cold.

“We don’t want to steal your thunder,” I say, keeping my voice easy.

A few people laugh, and soon the attention is off us. But Aria and I are still sitting there like we might break. Normally, we would laugh it off together, but Aria pulls her hand from mine. And that hurts worse than Zach’s question.