Chapter 47 Lexi
LEXI
As Evie and I left home for work the next morning, I found flowers on my doorstep. The card read: For old times’ sake. Dylan.
My jaw clenched. He’d barely looked at his daughter for an hour, but he had time to order flowers.
Dylan had refused to show up more often after I turned him down again when he was leaving. Dylan had thrown a few more barbs my way about me being too high-and-mighty now, and I was just grateful he’d done it out of Evie’s earshot. When he left that night, I was more than irritable.
Dylan didn’t want to be a father. He just didn’t want us to belong to anyone else.
Planning to trash the flowers when Evie wasn’t looking, we made our way to the subway, hand in hand.
Evie didn’t mention her dad even once during our ride.
Every time she began speaking of something from last evening, her face fell, and she stopped talking.
It made my heart break to know that she wanted more from her Dad and that I couldn’t give her that.
This Friday night, like many nights since my illness, Anne had picked up Evie from me and taken her home.
Jonah had convinced me to do this even after I’d recovered.
I’d let Anne take Evie home at five p.m., and I found that by the time I got home, Evie would have finished her bath and be in a better mood and ready for dinner.
It was unusual for me to rely on someone else, especially when it came to Evie, but I was learning to give up some of my need for control and relax.
But letting go of control wasn’t just about Evie. I was starting to realize something else about my relationship with Jonah.
Going by how he’d reacted a few days ago in his office, I held some power over Jonah, if I could talk him down from his dark, intense moods and comfort him.
Jonah was so well-connected, too powerful, and usually it felt like I’d been the one bending to his will every time, and that made that little victory feel extra special. It made me feel like I mattered.
Lost in these thoughts, I followed Jonah as he led me through a sprawling penthouse to meet Chloe and Sean. Jonah was dressed in a crisp navy shirt, with cream colored pants. I liked this version of him, sans the suit. I was wearing a short white dress, and ballet flats that were a gift from Jonah.
A housekeeper had led us in, and I stepped into the living room, and then froze.
My breath caught as I tilted my head back, taking in the vaulted ceilings that soared impossibly high above me.
God. I lived in an apartment where I could touch the ceiling if I stood on a stool, where the walls always felt like they were pressing in too close.
Here, the space opened up like a cathedral, all roomy and airy.
A kid could ride their bicycle in circles through here, and still have space left over.
I couldn’t stop staring. Floor-to-ceiling windows lined an entire wall, the furniture was tasteful, without being cluttered.
My shoes sank into carpet so plush I suddenly felt self-conscious about every step. How much did a place like this even cost? More importantly, was this what Jonah was used to?
How would I know… I’d never visited Jonah’s place before.
The feeling sank deep into my bones, and I was still unsettled by the idea when Jonah nodded at a couple who rose from a sleek white couch. I quickly snapped my mouth shut, heat flooding my cheeks, trying to look like I belonged in a place where people actually lived like this.
“Chloe, Sean,” Jonah said, stepping forward with his hand on my back, “I’d like you to meet Lexi.”
“It’s great to finally meet you properly,” Sean said, walking over with a warm smile. “How are you doing now?”
My gaze flicked over Jonah, who was watching me intently, before I turned and smiled. “Much better, thank you. Sorry I wasn’t able to meet you earlier when you were at my home.”
“Of course you couldn’t,” Jonah said, moving in closer to me, our arms now touching. It was subtle, probably unintentional, but I felt my cheeks heat while Chloe and Sean watched us with knowing looks. “You were recovering from the worst flu I’d ever seen anyone go through.”
Chloe’s grip was warm and confident as our hands met. “You don’t owe us an apology. We’re just glad we could help.”
Sean stepped forward, ignored my outstretched hand and pulled me into a hug. “Nice to meet you officially. We’ve heard a little about you, which, coming from Jonah, says a lot.”
I gave a quiet laugh, as Jonah pulled me back to his side. “Yeah, he’s not exactly forthcoming.”
“No,” Chloe said lightly. “But he called us for help. That’s new.” She and Sean exchanged a look.
I considered it, wondering what they must think of this thing between Jonah and me, and I realized it must seem bigger than what it really was.
“Jonah would turn the world upside down for the people he loves,” Chloe said loyally, and I felt my heart squeeze at that word.
Jonah and I hadn’t even discussed love yet.
Had I crossed a line I shouldn’t have by asking to meet Jonah’s friends?
I didn’t want them thinking there was something here that was not.
“What’s it like dating him?” Sean asked with a grin. “He’s absolutely bull-headed as a friend, by the way.”
I shook my head, but I couldn’t stop from smiling. “That does sound familiar,” I grinned, stealing a glance at Jonah. He gave me a look that was far too innocent for him.
“No idea what you mean,” he insisted, wrapping an arm around me cozily, his fingers almost brushing the bottom of my breast as he led me to the couch.
Touching each other in the presence of others was new to me, but Jonah wore his comfort with me so easily, he made it seem like we’d been doing this all along.
“Were you the ones who set him up with the pickpocket date?” I asked, remembering Jonah’s comment from earlier. At that, Sean burst into warm laughter while Chloe shot him a mock warning look.
“I can’t believe he actually went out with her,” Sean said, still chuckling, while Jonah shook his head.
“You’re lucky I’m too comfortable right now to come over there and hit you with a throw pillow,” Jonah said lazily.
“But Chloe and Sean are, unintentionally, the reason we met,” I said, turning to face Jonah. The slow smile spreading across his face told me he was reliving that night right now.
“That’s true,” he murmured, drawing me closer and pressing a kiss to my lips.
“By the way, how’s Evie doing?” Chloe asked, when they’d sat down across from us. Her legs were slung across Sean’s lap, and Sean held her feet in his hands, looking completely at ease.
“She’s doing great,” I said. “She’s with Anne tonight, probably exhausted from a unicorn-themed story marathon.”
Chloe smiled even more broadly. “Anne is the nanny we trust. We used her help when we needed someone for Lucas. And now for May,” she said, gesturing to the little child fast asleep in the crib.
I now noticed that Chloe had glitter on her jeans and a child’s rainbow bow clipped crookedly in her hair.
“Wow,” I said, feeling surprised. “You have kids too?”
“Yes, Lucas is Sean’s 12-year-old, and he’s at his mom’s tonight,” Chloe said.
Sean smiled at his wife. “I have Chloe to thank for bringing Lucas and me closer together. I mean, she’s the one who held him while he was sobbing in an elevator, right after I’d sent her all over town buying Spider-Man figurines because I thought that would solve our father-son bonding problems.”
He shook his head with a fond chuckle. “And now, Chloe and I have May, our one-year-old, who’s fast asleep right now in her room.”
“That explains all the glitter and bows,” I said, smiling and feeling touched by their kindness.
“Even when you came home, you knew exactly what to bring for Evie. Thank you. Both of you. It’s rare for Evie to play with someone she’s never met before, but she trusted you.
Of course, since Jonah trusts you both too.
She’s learned that anyone he approves of is okay. ”
Chloe’s expression shifted, like she was seeing something that wasn’t really there. “You don’t have to explain. We just wanted to help.”
I looked between Chloe and Sean, these two people so clearly connected, like a team built over time and trial. It felt oddly comforting. I should have felt out of place with this couple who were so clearly in love with each other, but instead, I felt … welcome.
I let out a breath. “And Jonah’s been … amazing. I don’t even have words for what he’s done for us. That night when I was ill, I wasn’t expecting him to bring his friends in for help. He doesn’t exactly open up.”
“He does now,” Sean said. “At least to you.”
I blinked, caught off guard by the simplicity of it. I gave a small smile and nodded.
I felt something unfamiliar but welcome stir in my chest.
That horrible night had reminded me what it looked like when people showed up for you. Not just when it suited them, but when it mattered the most. In spite of their excess wealth and busy schedules, they knew what was truly important.
I felt Jonah’s hands tighten around my waist.
“You okay?” he asked me, not even pretending to direct the question at anyone else.
I nodded, suddenly self-conscious and tucking my hair behind my ear. “Yeah. I’m just really glad we came.”
His gaze flicked to Chloe and Sean, who both gave him the tiniest smirks, like they knew exactly what was going through his head.
He cleared his throat. “Right. Good.”
And then, somehow, it all became easy. Chloe turned on some soft music, Sean poured us some drinks, and I curled up on the couch beside Jonah.
Sean was, like Jonah, a man of few words, but my heart warmed when I saw Jonah and Sean talk freely to each other. Seeing Jonah have friends made me feel happy.
They talked, they laughed, mostly at Sean’s expense, and by the time the food arrived, I couldn’t remember the last time I’d felt like this. Like I wasn’t just making it through the days, but like I was part of something meaningful.
At one point, I caught Jonah looking at me. Like he couldn’t quite believe I was here, with him, with them. Like I was something precious.
I gave him a soft smile and felt it down in my chest when he smiled back.
Was this freaking real?
“You can’t compare this to Jonah’s place,” Chloe said as we were leaving. I’d just complimented her on how beautiful their place was. “He’s got this incredible view of the city, I never tire of it whenever we visit.”
Her casual comment reminded me of my initial observation. In all our time together, in all our intimate moments, I’d never actually been to his apartment. He always came to mine, always stayed in my space. Why had I never noticed that before?
The thought lingered as we drove back home.
“What’s the matter?” Jonah asked when we parked outside my apartment. “Something about their place made you uncomfortable.”
In the soft darkness of the car, I held his gaze. “Yes. I realized I’ve never seen where you live.”
Jonah’s eyes went distant and he gave a low whistle. “I didn’t realize—” he began, then stopped abruptly. “Let’s fix it.” He took my hand in his, pressing a kiss to my knuckles. “Let’s go back to my place now.”
I smiled and shook my head. “Anne needs to go home, and I can’t spring this on Evie all of a sudden. I’ll need to give her a heads-up before I stay over anywhere.” I squeezed his hand. “But yes, I would love to see your place sometime, Jonah.”
It was a testament to how much he understood Evie’s place in my world that he didn’t push. He just nodded, his thumb tracing circles on the back of my hand.
Kissing him goodnight, I got out of the car and made my way up the stairs, feeling his gaze on me until I disappeared inside.
I bid Anne a good-night, and walked into Evie’s room to kiss her even though she was fast asleep. I lay in bed next to her for a good ten minutes, listening to the sound of her breathing before I stood up to head back to my room.
I paused by the window, needing air and perspective. Below, two men walked past my building holding hands, then settled onto a bench across the road, just within the glow of a streetlamp.
The couple looked so in love as they sat, hands touching, so close to each other that I felt a pang of longing when I witnessed their love for each other.
A fierce sense of awareness crept through me as I took in the way they looked at each other. Like they never wanted to look anywhere else.
I feel the same about Jonah, I realized with a shock.
Shit.
I love Jonah.
I had been so lost in the whirlwind of attraction for him that I never considered the implications of what could happen when we spent so much time together.
In the past, I’d met with Jonah because I wanted to live a little.
To find some part of me I’d repressed. But I found something entirely unexpected.
Love.
And I didn’t know what to make of it.
I was fully, deeply in love with him. And I had been for the longest time.