Chapter 3. Alice
ALICE
For every task Alice crossed off her to-do list, another popped up to take its place.
She needed to meet the architect at her latest client’s house to review the local safety codes for the renovations, her older son’s basketball game started in less than an hour, and as she stood in the basement laundry room rattling off a quick prayer to Saint Anthony to find Finn’s missing jersey, her mother called to say the catering crew had arrived at the Folly early to set up.
“They’re not supposed to be there until tomorrow,” Alice said. She pressed the phone against her shoulder as she rifled through the dirty clothes.
“I told them,” her mother said, as if that settled it.
“Where’s Dad?”
“Downstairs with his trains. He’s no use.”
Alice’s father had retired last year as an engineer at the Brookhaven National Laboratory. He now spent most of his time hiking or rearranging his massive train collection in the basement.
Alice was furious that Cait had hired caterers for Thanksgiving dinner in the first place.
“I have to meet with David,” Alice said.
“David?”
“The architect I’ve been working with at the Hickeys’ for the last two months?”
“Of course,” her mother said. Then: “Maybe you can swing by for a quick chat before?”
Alice wanted to say no, but she imagined her mother tripping on the flagstone and hurting her knee again. “I’ll be there in a few.”
She dug out Finn’s jersey from the laundry basket, hidden under a heap of damp dish towels, and inspected a stain on the collar. Ketchup? Tomato sauce? Blood? She threw the jersey into the dryer along with some fabric softener sheets to mask the odor.
Upstairs, she found her husband, Kyle, in the garage, busy fixing their younger son’s bike.
His tools were meticulously arranged next to him like an army of obedient soldiers awaiting his command.
If only he had the same level of enthusiasm for the rest of the house as he did for the garage.
Kyle was the principal at Saint Mary’s, where the boys attended school, and he had less than an hour between getting home that afternoon and taking Finn back for his basketball game.
This was not exactly how she wanted him to spend that time.
“Do you have to do that now?” she asked.
Kyle tinkered with something on the wheel. “James needs to get off his electronics and move his body,” he said. “This’ll be good for him.”
She could have used a hand getting ready for Thanksgiving, but the conversation she really wanted to have, about dividing the household chores more equally now that she was working again, was much larger and not worth getting into at this point.
And, honestly, she didn’t feel she was making enough money yet to justify asking for the help.
She estimated she earned around ten dollars an hour if she added up all the time she spent working at the Hickeys’.
She loved the work, though, and would have done it for free if she had to.
Still, with her secret hope to go back to grad school for interior design, she knew she had to figure out a way to find more balance.
To remind him of everything she still had to do that day, she said, “I need to swing by my parents’ to deal with the caterers before stopping by the Hickeys’.”
Kyle checked the time on his watch. “They scheduled a meeting the afternoon before Thanksgiving?”
Alice had her own frustrations about the timing of the meeting, but she was desperate to please her biggest client, Georgia Hickey.
It was a small project—the Hickeys’ guest bungalow—but a rare chance to grow her portfolio, and if everything went well, Georgia had promised to introduce her to all her country club friends who needed a designer.
“I’ll be in and out in no time,” she assured Kyle.
Kyle nodded, but Alice worried he thought she was spreading herself too thin. Maybe she was. She couldn’t remember when they’d last gone to bed together at the same time or enjoyed a glass of wine on the deck at the end of the day.
It was cold enough in the garage to see her breath, but Kyle wore only his suit pants and a white undershirt.
His middle-aged paunch was becoming more pronounced, but his arms and legs were muscular from cycling.
Affection spread through her as she watched him flip the bike right side up.
This is how he shows the boys he cares , she thought.
She walked over to him and kissed the top of his head.
He reached for her hand and squeezed it once before returning to the task at hand.
In the kitchen, she found James in his karate uniform, leaning on the counter and picking at a bowl of fruit.
There were times, like now, when he looked so much like a young Topher that she felt as if she were seeing her actual brother standing in front of her, with his shaggy mess of strawberry curls and his hazel eyes that tended toward green. It was disquieting.
“You don’t have practice today,” she said.
“I know.” He stuck a raspberry onto the tip of his thumb and nibbled at it. “But I want to show Augustus and Poppy my uniform.”
Alice couldn’t get over the names Augustus and Poppy. Her older sister had always been a snob, but this was even worse than the transatlantic accent she had acquired since moving to London more than a decade ago.
As she packed a cooler with Gatorade, she called down the hall for Finn to get ready.
When she turned around, she found Kyle walking into the kitchen, cleaning bike grease off his hands with a rag. “Are we sleeping at the Folly?” he asked.
James popped another raspberry into his mouth. “Yes! Can we?”
Alice shot Kyle a look. She hadn’t told the boys about her mother’s request that they stay, mainly because she was deciding if she could stand that much time with Cait.
“We’ll see,” Alice said.
“I’m fine with it,” Kyle said.
James jumped up on the stool, pressed his hands together in prayer, and cocked his head like a puppy.
Finn appeared at the kitchen entrance. Since starting eighth grade, he had grown and was now officially taller than Alice.
“There you are,” she said.
Finn pressed the jersey to his nose. “My shirt stinks. Did you wash it?”
“Your mother is not your maid,” Kyle said. “You can do your own laundry.”
So can you , Alice thought.
“Sorry, Mother.” Finn kissed her cheek. “You’re coming to the game, right?”
“Oh, Finny, I can’t. I’m so sorry.”
There was no question that Finn liked things better when she wasn’t working.
He was stuck bumming rides from his buddies after practice and watching his little brother until she got home.
To try to make it up to him, she’d slipped notes into his lunchbox at the beginning of the school year— things like Have an awesome day!
and Love you! —but he had recently told her that he was too old for that sort of thing.
Finn made a sad face but then walked by James and punched his arm.
“Ow!” James cried. He tried to swing back, but Finn jumped away.
“What was that for?” Alice said, restraining James.
“Stop messing with my stuff,” Finn said.
“I didn’t!”
James squirmed out of Alice’s hold and charged Finn. Both boys rolled around on the kitchen floor until Kyle finally told Finn to get his sneakers. They jumped up and bounded down the hallway, pushing each other against the walls.
“Hey!” Kyle thundered.
The house immediately quieted as the boys hurried to their room.
Kyle had grown up as an army brat and later became an Eagle Scout, president of his Catholic Studies Club at Seton Hall, and a National Guard soldier before getting hired as the principal at Saint Mary’s.
He’d perfected his “Hey!” so that it spoke for itself. Even Alice obeyed.
Kyle picked at the browning bananas in James’s bowl. “We don’t have to stay at your parents’ if you don’t want to,” he said.
“No,” she said. “We can. It’ll make my mom happy.”
Kyle nodded. His parents lived with his sister in New Jersey. Nothing was expected of him. In many ways, this was a relief. Alice’s father-in-law had Alzheimer’s, and Kyle’s sister had the means to hire a caregiver. But Alice also knew Kyle got off easy because he was the son, not the daughter.
Kyle grabbed his jacket. She was trying something new lately—seeing what would happen if she didn’t initiate the goodbye or welcome-home kiss.
“Mukesh wants to know what time he should come tomorrow,” Kyle said as he tossed the fruit bowl in the dishwasher.
Mukesh was one of Kyle’s buddies from the Guard. He was moving to London after the New Year to start work at a law firm, and Kyle had some grand plan to play matchmaker with Cait.
“Two o’clock,” Alice said. “But I think she’s too mean for him.”
“That’s what he likes,” Kyle said, and winked. Then he called down the hall, “Finn, I’m leaving.”
No kiss.
In her room, Alice slumped onto the unmade bed. She needed to put together a decent outfit for her meeting with David and leave soon, but exhaustion overtook her. She closed her eyes for a minute of relief, only to wake up to James yelling from the other room about missing his green karate belt.
“You can wear your uniform without the belt!” she shouted back. She rose from the bed even more depleted than before. How much time had passed?
“But then they won’t know I’m a green belt,” James said, walking into the room.
“You can tell them.”
The phone rang. Her mother again. She looked at James. “Don’t answer it.”
She quickly changed, packed a bag of clothes for Kyle and herself, then went into the boys’ room to get their stuff ready for the weekend.
When she walked in, she found James leaning against his bed holding a magazine. It took her a second to realize that it was a Hustler , the cover featuring a woman teasingly peeling off her bikini top.
“James!” she said.
He threw the magazine across the room and held up his hands.
Alice picked it up. “Where’d you get this?”
“It was in my duffel bag!”