Retreat Lecture 5 - The Dying Twin-Star Sutra
RETREAT
THE DYING TWIN-STAR SUTRA
lecture five of seven delivered by the one Mother Nova of the Northern Temple of the Starlit Order to the newly ordained Vessel apprentices
[Apprentice discussion included throughout]
Mother Nova: “Two stars orbited one another for all eternity. They had been together since the beginning of all time and would spend the rest of all time together. Equal in mass and luminosity, they were identical in every way. But as time passed, the bond between them weakened, and as they spun around one another, one star began to slowly drift away.” What does this opening passage tell us about relationships?
Apprentice: Relationships, no matter how strong and perfect, will falter with time.
Mother Nova: Perhaps. Or perhaps, the way we relate to others can change with time. It is neither good nor bad, but only changing. Remember, change is the only constant of the cosmos. Let’s keep going.
“Frightened, one of the stars, feeling that its companion was slowly drifting away, turned all its faculties towards pulling the drifting star closer. After all, they had been orbiting one another for millennia, and neither wanted to be alone. The drifting star couldn’t help but drift, and the remaining star couldn’t help but remain.
Still, neither wanted to lose their companion.
The remaining star pulled the drifting star closer.
It pulled harder and harder, closer and closer.
For the closer the drifting star came, the better the remaining star felt.
” What does this tell us about the nature of some relationships?
Apprentice: That someone will inevitably clutch too tightly?
Mother Nova: Correct! But do not place blame on the one who clutches too tightly, for they are doing so not out of malicious intent, but out of fear. So much of what we do is driven by fear. We hold on, or we drift away, because we cannot see the objective truth of what is.
“The harder the remaining star pulled, the closer the drifting star drew.” And we all know how gravity works.
“When the drifting star got too close, the remaining star began to absorb it into itself. It took the luminosity and the mass. And the drifting star could do nothing but let itself go and watch its companion devour it. And the remaining star took more and more until there was nothing left of the drifting star. And the remaining star said, ‘Now you are one with me, and you will never leave.’ But there was no one to leave now, for the drifting star was gone. And the remaining star was now alone and lonelier than ever.” What does this tell us about relationships?
Apprentice: That the desire for the Other will always lead to suffering?
Mother Nova: [laughs] Now, you memorised that from a teaching, I can see.
And you’ve done such a great job memorising, you didn’t even stop to think before you said it.
It was right there at the front of your mind.
But I want you to think of a different ending for the sutra.
What if the remaining star never pulled as hard? What would have happened?
Apprentice: I don’t know, Mother Nova. The other star would remain, I suppose. In some way. Maybe not even drift too far.
Mother Nova: And what does that teach us about the nature of relationships?
Apprentice: They won’t inherently be destructive if we don’t clutch too tightly?
Mother Nova: Exactly! Relationships are not bad.
They are an experience, just like everything else is in life.
This can be a long experience or a short one, but an experience, nonetheless.
When you try to control someone, when you try to hold on to them at any cost, you risk destroying the relationship.
That’s what we try to teach here: to hold gently, to make space for one another, in whatever relationships you encounter.
[End of recording]