Chapter 17
Seventeen
“Iwant one,” Miss Penrose said without preamble.
Evander looked up from his newspaper. She was in the doorway of the drawing room with Titan beside her, one hand resting on the dog's enormous head as though they had known each other for years.
Titan, for his part, looked settled, which Evander found faintly insulting given that Titan was supposed to be his dog.
“He stayed with me last night you know,” Lydia continued, coming in and taking the chair across from him without being invited.
“All night long. He took up three quarters of the bed, which I did not mind because I find his company considerably more restful than most people's. You don’t mind, do you?” She looked at Titan with genuine warmth.
“I want one exactly like him. Where does one acquire a dog like this? Is there a specific arrangement or do they simply appear in one's life, carried in by…? Well it wouldn’t be a stork, would it? One of those hot air balloons?”
“They appear in Reading, usually. At least that’s where we purchased them. I can put you in contact with the breeder, if you’re serious,” Evander said, folding the broadsheet. “And you should be serious if you want to keep one. They are not like Mrs. Harrow’s dogs in the slightest.”
“Obviously. I wouldn’t dream of trying to fit Titan in a little bag and carry him around, feeding him pieces of chicken.
Whole pheasants, more like.” She reached over and took a biscuit from the plate without asking.
“I would name mine something sensible though, not like these two. Titan and Nike…. Those are very grand names.”
Evander cleared his throat. “My brother named them.”
“Of course he did.” She clapped the crumbs off her hands.
“Speaking of which – Aurelia is troubled this morning. She didn’t say as much, obviously.
I looked in on her before I came down. She was in the music room but she wasn't really playing, just sitting at the piano looking at it very sadly. And when I asked her how she was she said fine, in that funny voice of hers when she is lying.” She looked at him directly.
“You will know the voice I mean, Your Grace.”
“Perhaps I do,” he said.
“Obviously it is to do with last night. I would not expect anything different. We heard the news this morning… But neither of them were at breakfast. Curious. Poor Aurelia. There was something else in her answer too…” She was looking at him gravely – as gravely as a woman like Miss Penrose could manage.
“I was going to ask her about it this morning but she rejected me very smoothly, which she is excellent at, as you also know. So I thought I would mention it to you instead, in case you had some idea of what could be done ab—”
“Good morning.”
They both turned. Frederick was in the doorway in his shirtsleeves, hair still disordered from sleep, looking considerably less composed than he had the night before.
He took in the room, registered Miss Penrose with mild surprise, like he had forgotten there were other guests, and then looked at Evander.
“Am I interrupting?”
“Not at all,” Lydia said pleasantly, her smile making her cheeks bloom. “I was just leaving, for fact.” She stood, took another biscuit, and paused beside Evander's chair on her way past. “We will speak later,” she said quietly, and was gone before Frederick had sat down.
Frederick watched her go. “Who is that?”
“That would be Miss Penrose. Aurelia's close friend.”
“She is not like Aurelia at all.” He sat down and reached for the coffee pot. “She is very bright. Not that Aurelia is not bright, but–”
“Frederick.”
His brother looked at him, eyes wide.
“Let's not, shall we?” Evander finished.
Frederick set down the coffee pot. “Right,” he said. “Yes, you’re right. As always. It’s excruciating.” He poured his cup, added milk, and looked at the table for a moment. “Let’s start at the start. How bad is it?”
Evander considered the question, smiling at how bizarre it was.
“Financially? None the worse. The estate is in good order. The Suffolk property is sold, which you know, since that is partly why you are here. The Perthshire holding came from Aurelia through the settlement and will remain with her. Beyond that…” He moved his newspapers aside and leaned on his elbows on the table between them.
“The situation is what it is. You are married. I am married. And the unentailed properties will need to be divided properly at some point with the solicitors. I will not sell anything more now that you’re returned. ”
“Did you not think I would come back?” Frederick asked, hissing at the too-hot temperature of the tea.
“Sometimes I didn’t.”
Frederick was quiet for a moment. “And the other times? What did you think would happen then? I would like you to say it.”
Somehow being around his brother in the flesh made things easier than they had been without him. Strange, he thought. He should have been ringing his neck instead over talking over tea and biscuits.
“Say what, exactly? That you left? You know what happened. You did it. It seems a waste of time to lay out those events for you,” Evander said.
“But you cannot expect I would be pleased. You left without a word to me, and without any consideration of what would follow. And Aurelia– Did you not think about Aurelia?”
Frederick received this without deflecting it, which was at least something. He sat with it for a moment, both hands around his cup, looking at the table.
“I knew if I told you how I really felt,” he said finally, “you would have tried to talk me out of it. Or you would have found some arrangement, some solution. And God forbid any of our other relations became involved. Like Granny… How is Granny?”
“Still alive, no thanks to you and the shock you gave her by running off.”
“I will need to go down and see her.”
“Yes, you should.”
“It was cruel to leave the way we did. We didn’t go joyously.
We felt we had no other option. Our love…
” The tips of his ears went red. “What was – is – between us wasn’t a problem that could be solved, and I knew that’s what you would try and make it.
To fix it with some stern words, just like…
” He snapped his fingers, then he stopped.
“It was what I wanted, to leave and marry, what we both wanted, she and I. And I knew you would not understand that.”
“How could you know? You didn't even give me the chance to understand it.”
Frederick nodded. “I didn't.” He looked up. “And I am sorry for that, I mean it. The way it happened… the wedding, and Aurelia likely standing there, mortified… that is not what I wanted. I want you to know that. I did not want her to be hurt.”
“But you didn’t care to try and protect her either,” Evander said, looking into space. “I don’t know that I will ever forgive you for that, now that she is my wife.”
“You have taken her enemies on as your own, I understand that.”
“You are not her enemy, Frederick.”
“No? Close enough.” He laughed mirthlessly. “What about the rest of it? You’re not cross about… For me and Seraphina?”
Evander took a moment to think. “It will follow us forever. That is troublesome. But the lady herself?” He shrugged one-shouldered.
“You knew from the first what our arrangement was. There was no passion between us. And I do wonder whether that was why you permitted yourself to love her. You knew it would not matter to me if you took her instead. Even if that is not the case, I prefer to think of things that way.”
“Then I will not try to change your mind.” Frederick was quiet again for a moment. “How is she, truly?”
Evander looked at him. His brother was still young and had always worn his feelings on his face in a way that Evander had spent his whole life learning not to do. He looked tired and genuinely uncertain, and whatever guilt he was carrying about Aurelia was real; Evander could see that.
“Aurelia? She is well enough,” he said. “She has settled here by now. She is considerably more accommodating than I anticipated, and she is intelligent and well-mannered.” He paused.
“But last night was difficult for her, and I expect this week will be too. I would ask you to bear that in mind, to not flaunt your rebellious marriage to Lady… to the Lady Canterbury in front of her.”
“She never loved me,” Frederick said, “if that is your concern.”
It was, but the last thing Evander wanted to do was discuss this with his brother.
It was too close to the conversation he had had with Patrick at the club.
He couldn’t bear thinking that she had looked at Frederick and wanted him, that she had been kissed by him, that she had pictured their children.
“We never even–”
“I don’t need to know what you did or did not do,” Evander cut him off. “You only need to promise me that you will do whatever it takes not to make this situation worse for her. If that means remaining outside of society for a while…”
“Yes, then I will do it. And I won’t try asking for her forgiveness. I don’t deserve it.” Frederick looked at him steadily. “And you? Are you… is it…” He stopped and tried again. "Are you satisfied with how things have turned out?”
“That is not a question I am going to answer now.”
“Why?”
“Because you have been in my house for less than twelve hours, and I’m still not sure I trust you.”
For some reason, Frederick almost smiled at that. He drank his coffee and was quiet for a while, and Evander read a note from Poole that had come in with the papers.
“We will stay out of the way,” Frederick said eventually. “This week, I mean. Seraphina and I… We won't impose. We can occupy ourselves, though of course, we will be discreet. And then we'll go somewhere else, and we won't be under your feet. I will make this right, as much as I can.”