59. Kiera
FIFTY-NINE
KIERA
I returned the Vessels and the remaining store of Lepid to my secure stores. A small vault, keyed only to my magic where I kept my most lethal and precious ingredients.
I had been trying to deconstruct the magic the vessels used to see if this potion could be produced on a larger scale. I wanted to be able to help any future fae who suffer the loss of their soul-bonded and keep them from turning to the awful street potions of the past that do them just as much damage. And I was sure there would be more uses for it. Bringing back plants we thought we lost could have so many uses.
But right now, I had to prepare for my first group training session as Jax’s ryder. My stomach was in knots, and I was considering hiding myself in the vault with the vessels.
“You won’t fit in there,” Nyx’s voice came from the doorway .
I whirled round and caught him leaning against the doorframe of my work room, grinning.
“How did you know what I was thinking?”
“I just know you.” He smirked. “If your work wasn’t so important to you, I would have considered you a flight risk, but I knew you’d be here, no matter much you want to run away today.”
“Do you blame me?”
“Not really,” he chuckled.
I sealed the vault with my magic and crossed the room to wash my hands.
“How did you sleep?” I asked.
It had been almost two weeks since he took the potion, and Jaxus and I hadn’t stayed there since.
We’d move back here to my rooms after Nyx arranged new quarters for Emrys.
“Like I tell Zaria when she asks every three minutes, I am sleeping well and feeling so much better. Thank you, again for saving me from that life.”
“And like I keep telling you every time you thank me, thanks are not necessary. The kingdoms needed you. And as your healer I did what I could to keep you well for them and for us.”
He smiled. “Speaking of the kingdoms’ needs, are you ready for this?”
I sucked in a breath. “Not really.”
The whole thing had seemed easy when we discussed it, but actually going out there as a ryder and facing all those battle-hardened warriors I was supposed to stand beside made me feel like a fraud. “What if I make a fool of myself?”
“You won’t.”
“I’m not one of them, though, and they know it. I’m a healer through and through. They will never accept me.”
“You just pulled off something most couldn’t, with all the grit and courage of any other ryder. But if you weren’t a healer, Jaxus could have died. Being a healer makes you more than most, not less. You have earned your place among the flight, and you have more to offer the kingdoms than most of them put together. Now get out there and show them!”
“Where is Jaxus?” I asked, ignoring his compliments.
“Getting them in line for the training session.”
I groaned. “I thought he would at least let me walk in with him.”
“Is walking in with their general not good enough for you?”
“Fine.” I rolled my eyes, untying my apron and smoothing my braid.
Nyx shook his head. “A healer in leathers, whatever next?”
“Listen, I have to multitask now, okay? If you think I can fit quick changes into my packed schedule, you’re delusional.”
Nyx held his hands up in surrender, laughing, and for the first time in months, it felt genuine.
“Are you doing okay?” I asked.
His smile softened. “Thanks to you, I’m doing much better.”
I sighed with relief for the hundredth time since we figured out the cure. “Good, but you have to talk to us if that changes. It’s a process and we are all here—me, Jaxus, and Zaria—to get you through it. Okay?”
Nyx nodded and pushed off the door frame. “Come on, you badass leather wearing healer, I have to get you to training.”
The flights not currently on patrol gathered once a week on the fields behind the palace for flight training. It was part of the bigger program of training that kept them all battle ready. Weapons, magic wielding and flying were all practiced daily in various classes, but this was the session that brought it all together in flight. And it was very, very public.
While the other sessions were held in much smaller, flight-specific groups, this was for all the serving flights plus the many trainees who came to watch and learn. Not to mention it was open for anyone in the city to view. My inferiority complex was going to kill me.
“I haven’t had a single weapons class yet,” I hissed at Nyx as we strolled across the training ground towards the assembled dragons and their ryders.
“Relax, we are not focusing on weapons today. This is to assess your melded magic level and your wielding skills in flight. And you have proved yourself in both areas in a real situation. You have nothing to worry about.”
“But they’re all going to watch?”
“They will all be doing their own exercises and won’t have time to gawp at you. Rakan needs to assess our combined powers for the flight records. With so much happening lately Zaria and I have not even been officially assessed for the records, so you’re not alone. We well be right there with you.”
I didn’t feel better. Nyx had no clue about the problems I had even looking some of these flyers in the eye.
“You have to do this. Jaxus can’t fully assert himself as my lieutenant until they see him in action with his ryder. They won’t show him the respect he is due until they have no choice but to bow to his superior power.”
“No pressure then,” I choked.
“For you? None whatsoever. You are ten times the fae that most of these are. And melded with Jaxus, I have no doubt it’s going to be special to watch.”
It was special, but I had no way of knowing how that compared to others.
We approached the ranks of flights, and even my regular fae hearing caught the snickering from the lines. Jaxus met us at the center, shooting a glare towards the tittering.
“They are ready for your instructions,” he told Nyx.
“Any trouble?”
“Just the usual pushback,” he replied .
Nyx smirked. “Don’t worry friend, I have a feeling that’s about to change.” He patted Jaxus’ shoulder and moved forward to address the ranks.
Jaxus took his place beside me.
“This is very official,” I murmured nervously, mind to mind.
“It’s just to get them in order, otherwise it would be chaos, and nothing would be achieved,” he assured me. “Nyx will divide them up in a minute, and they will all go off in groups to do their own exercises.”
“And us?”
“Once I’ve instructed our flight on their exercises, you and I will go and fly the course for Rakan to assess us before we join them.”
My eyes went wide, and I almost answered out loud. “A course? Isn’t that something we should have practiced?”
“Calm down, Firefly. You can’t practice this, Rakan creates a new one for each session. It’s simply a set of magical markers thrown up into the air, that’s all. He will tell us what we have to do before we fly.”
“Calm down, relax, that’s all I keep hearing today. You don’t seem to understand how hard it is for me to do this with such an audience.”
“Shut them out. Don’t think about how many fae are watching. It’s just about you and me.”
“It’s not about how many are watching. It’s about which ones specifically are watching.”
Jaxus finally understood my meaning and glanced away, scanning the ranks for the specific fae he knew I was worried about.
“Don’t think about them,” he said with such a soothing tone into my mind. “They have been helping the healers, have they not? Maybe they won’t give you any more trouble.”
I side-eyed him. “You think?”
“I do. ”
I narrowed my eyes. “And that pushback you told Nyx about that you are still getting from them, who exactly is leading that?”
He returned his gaze to me, his face giving me the answer.
“I thought so.”
“It’s only because I’ve been trying to lead them without proving myself. After today, we will be part of this, and they won’t be able to use it as an excuse to ignore my orders and flout the rules anymore.”
I really hoped he was right.
After the individual flights were dismissed to start training in their groups, we found space for ourselves and they began practicing takeoffs and landings in different circumstances. We watched the rest of the group trying different mounting techniques for quick take off.
Jaxus shouted commands and pointers at the various pairs, and they hardly listened. I knew this was the reception he was getting, but watching it was extremely frustrating.
“Show them that thing you do, Kiera,” Jaxus called without warning. I was caught off guard and rendered speechless.
There was a scoffing snort from the line of dragons and then one snapped at another. If I wasn’t very much mistaken, it looked like Koen had snapped at his cohort, almost like he was telling him off, which couldn’t be right. Then his eyes met mine, and the barely masked hatred in them told me I’d definitely got that wrong. I swallowed.
“Firefly?” Jaxus spoke into my mind.
“I—I—” I began to reply, when our names were called by Rakan for our assessment.
I couldn’t decide if I was relieved or terrified.
“Why do you look like you’re walking to your death?” asked Jaxus as we walked over.
“Because that’s how it feels!”
“This isn’t a test we can fail, Firefly,” he reassured.
“No? If I make a fool of us and they never respect you because of it, that’s a death of sorts, isn’t it? The death of your career.”
Jaxus laughed.
“Are you laughing at me?”
“Yes! I’ve never seen you like this. You never doubt yourself. What makes you do it now?”
“Because I never have to doubt my abilities as a healer. This ryder thing is a whole other matter.”
“Well, the healer I escaped Kerani with is a damn good ryder, so can I have her to do this with, please?”
I glared at him
“What?”
“I’m freaking out, and your solution to that is to be an arse?”
He smirked.
“It’s not funny!”
He turned to me then and took my hands in his. “What is funny is you freaking out over an assessment of our melded powers. Do you not realize how valuable our magic is to the kingdoms?”
“I don’t doubt it. I’m just not comfortable with the entire legion watching.”
“Some are out on patrols. It’s not the whole legion,” he responded helpfully.
“I could punch you sometimes.” I scowled.
“Don’t do that, you don’t want to hurt your hand again”. He openly beamed at that.
“You think you’re so funny, don’t you?”
“I have my moments,” he chuckled. “The point is, no one here is watching. They all have their own training to get on with, so forget about them. It’s just you and me.”
I grimaced. I would swear that if I turned around, all eyes would be on me, waiting for me to fail. But I couldn’t even make myself check. So, instead, I listened while Rakan explained the course .
We had to hit certain markers, avoid obstacles, and use our magic to take on any threats we encountered.
Nyx and Zaria went first, and I watched in awe as they flew through tight curves, high and low, blasting several illusions that sprung up in front of them, cast by an instructor with illusion magic from the ground.
What impressed me most was how their magic came together and then separated as the need arose. Zaria blasted an impressive force out that threw one illusion away so forcefully, the caster fell down from the impact to his magic. They finished in a flourish with a blast of Nyx’s beautiful but deadly night fire. I was in awe, and their perfect synchronicity only made me more nervous.
As they came into land, a roar went up. The whole training ground erupted with applause and dragon cries of admiration.
“See,” I hissed. “They are all watching.”
“He’s their general,” he insisted. “No one cares about us. Now suck it up, it’s our turn.”
He quickly slipped out of his clothes and shifted while I followed him to the start position.
I took a deep breath and summoned the magic I had begun using for an easy and quick mount. It was an adaptation of what healers used to move patients. And it converted perfectly for launching onto Jaxus. In healing, we made a soft air cushion that carried the patient above the ground, then we could guide them. It was like a delicate version of the blast Zaria could wield and I used it to vault up onto Jaxus’ back in a way that I knew made it look like I flew. It sure beat climbing his scales.
“Nice,” he complimented mind to mind.
A bell rang and Jaxus took off. We flew left, then right, passing through glowing markers as we went. An illusion rose up ahead of us. A dragon that reminded me of the head of Kerani’s council. Jaxus blasted fire and I felt the pull on my magic where it joined with his to sustain the attack. It was a rush to be using our combined magic this way again so soon—I cut off the thought. Only days ago, I’d hoped never to be in a situation like that again. Now it was a rush? I feared for my sanity.
“You’re just realizing how good we are together, aren’t you?” Jaxus invaded my thoughts.
Before I could respond, another illusion of a dragon flew into our path. Together, we beat it back. Nothing like Zaria had managed, but not a shameful effort by far.
As we could see the end of the course, the final illusion appeared and I was horrified to find it resembled one of the undead. It was different, but in some ways similar. It had whitened eyes and a pallid complexion. That was when I knew why Nyx had used night fire. Because this thing was an illusion of a Vivi Mortui. Something the new undead were merely a copy of. Regular dragon fire rarely had the power to take them down if my memory served.
So Nyx had an advantage there since there was nothing regular about his fire.
Jaxus drew in air to launch an attack.
“Wait!” I cried into his mind. “Your fire won’t be enough.”
“What then?” he replied urgently.
Thinking through what I knew faster than I could register, I came to an idea. “Let me.”
I drew on the source of his fire, a vapor which was highly flammable, and I mixed it with magic of my own. Healing magic. These creatures could not be destroyed until they were separated from their master’s control. Back in the wars, they sought out the masters rather than going after the creatures. Once they were down, the creatures were simple to kill.
But if I could ‘heal’ the thing inside the creature that was linked to its master, could we break their control? It was our only option with what we had. I pulled from deep within, using an older type of healing magic Gran favored. One which could seek out a sickness and target it from a time before some of our newer tests were developed. I pushed all my healing power into Jaxus, and without any instruction, as if he was an extension of my own power, he shot a stream of the near-invisible vapor that ordinarily charged his fire straight at the undead-looking dragon.
It roared its rage to the skies and then its cries were silenced, eyes changed. The white disappeared, leaving alive looking dragon eyes for a fraction of a second and then it plummeted to the ground.
We turned to come back around, and as we came back to land, the roars and applause deafeningly greeted us.
“That was incredible, Firefly!” Jaxus set us down amid the chaos. I slid from his back, wanting to hide from all the attention.
“No one cares about us, huh?” I muttered as Jaxus shifted and took an offered pair of pants from Nyx.
“What was that?” Nyx shouted above the noise. “It looked like you simply stared at it, and it fell out of the sky!”
“I—umm—” I didn’t know what to say. I had come up with it literally on the fly and I couldn’t really dissect it right now.
“A very interesting power combination,” Rakan said. He had an acidic nature, and he had little time for pleasantries, so I knew his interest was a compliment in itself. “And a magic strength only rivaled by our general and his ryder.”
Jaxus dipped his chin in thanks to him and turned to take me in his arms.
“See, Firefly? We aced that.”
“We did.” I agreed, a little stunned by having to think so quickly and still trying to catch up with my own thought process. As a healer, I hated not knowing what in particular it was I’d done to make something work. I liked to study outcomes and learn from them. But with all the commotion around us, it would have to wait until later.
“Come on. Let’s go assert ourselves over our flight,” Jaxus said, all charged up and ready to take on even the most disrespectful of flyers.
I blew out a breath but walked side by side with him over to our group. As we approached, one by one, the dragons shifted back to fae form and took one knee, bowing their heads. Their ryders followed suit.
It was a show of great respect, and I almost staggered back from the shock of it.
After a moment of reverence, they all rose and gathered around their leader. Jaxus crossed his arms over his chest and took each of them in, seeming to soak up the acknowledgement of our power.
“I hope now that we understand each other, we can begin working together as a team?” He asked.
Koen stepped forward, the speaker of the team. “We appreciate your forbearance, Lieutenant.”
Jaxus nodded. Then Koen turned to me and I held my breath.
“And I wish to welcome you into our flight, Kiera. That was an impressive performance.”
I blinked. How was I meant to respond to that? After all these years of mistreatment, now I was welcome?
He looked suitably acquiescent, but could I trust it?
I didn’t get too much time to think before he looked to his ryder and they seemed to exchange words through their bond then he nodded and looked back with a sheepish smile. “And I think we’d all like you to show us that move you did to mount up.”
My lips curled up without my permission. “I can show you, but it’s healing magic, so I don’t know if it will translate.”
I couldn’t believe this was happening.
“We’ve recently learned that a few of us have a little of that. So if you have time to teach us, I’m sure we can grasp it with some practice.”
I nodded. “Okay. ”
“Don’t look so terrified, Firefly,” Jaxus spoke softly through the bond. “Stand your ground and hold your head high. We are the strongest pair in the legion behind Nyx and Zaria. They should kneel, and they should want to learn from you. Own it.”
His words were a balm. “I love you,” I replied before mustering every scrap of confidence I had in me and launching into a lesson on how I control air, the healer way.