Chapter 19
Despite witnessing the beauty from a mile above, I’ve decided traveling by dragon is not my preferred method of transportation. My hands ache from gripping Caspian’s scales, and throughout the ride, I think a gust of wind might blow me straight off his back. Only Bastian keeps me grounded, his arm tight around my waist.
I’m still high on the adrenaline when I slide to the ground, thankful I’m no longer worried about my ankle.
Bastian bows his chin slightly to Caspian. “Thank you, dear friend.”
And with storm-force winds, the dragon lifts off, soaring into the night sky. Never in my life did I think I’d add a dragon ride to something I’d do before I died. It lifted my soul in ways I can’t explain while terrifying me at the same time.
“Do you do that often?” I ask as we walk the short distance from the meadow to the cabin.
“What?” He cocks an eyebrow. “Thank a dragon?”
I slap him on the arm, shaking my head. “No. Ride on one. It was like free falling with a safety net.” I clasp his upper arm. “Or dancing among the stars with a dangerous partner.”
“And do you do that often?” He stops and steps closer to me.
“What? Ride a dragon? You know it was my first time.” My pulse quickens with his nearness. Our bodies are now less than a foot apart.
“No. Dance with a dangerous partner?” The corner of his lip rises as his eyes drink me in.
“The others won’t be back until morning, right?” I swallow, unsure of how I want to proceed yet knowing my words probably acknowledge consent.
He lifts a hand to a stray wisp of hair falling over my forehead and tucks it behind my ear. “I’m counting on it.” A shy smile crosses his lips. “Are you sure your ankle’s alright?”
“It better be after the pain Ben put me through.” I lace my fingers through his and tug him toward the cabin. Fireflies dance among the trees and tall grasses, calling out to their mates. I want this man, but the tiny voice of Avren nags away in the back of my mind.
It is not right.
You are not of age.
You are not married.
Everything within me wants to plug my ears and sing at the top of my lungs to make them go away, but they won’t. The voices threaten to ruin my time with Bastian.
He unlocks the front door with the key around his neck. This time, he doesn’t bother with lighting an oil lamp. We head straight for the stairs, trusting in his navigational skills.
At the top of the stairs, he opens the door to his bedroom and releases my hand. He lights a candle on his small writing desk, the glow casting shadows throughout the space.
The voices grow louder when he wraps his arms around me and rests his hands on my lower back. “Mari, I don’t want you to do anything you don’t want to do. You mean more to me than that. In the beginning, I tied our connection to lust. The first time I saw you, I thought you were a mythical angel. How else could I explain my attraction to you?”
His assessment makes me smile. “I’m no angel.” Lifting my head, I look him in the eyes. “I was attracted to you too, but I didn’t know what to do with those feelings. I grew up in a place where people look down on physical attraction, unless formed with a Council-appointed spouse.”
But I can’t help myself.
Long strands of dark hair fall over his forehead in sharp contrast to his eyes. He lifts a hand to my face, cupping my cheek in his palm, a gentle finger running along my skin. “We’ve come so far with you. But there’s still a lot of work to do. Avren’s brainwashing runs deep.” He closes his eyes. “I can’t imagine what it’s like. Gray tried to explain it to me.” Looking at me again, his eyes swim with sympathy, making me feel like a charity case. “Spending time with a person you’re attracted to is the most natural thing in the world.”
I don’t want someone to be with me out of pity or because I’m a weird sociological experiment. Can we break Maribel out of her hypnotic allegiance to Avren and its stringent rules?
I step back from him, breaking the magnetic field, at least on my part. “I think you should sleep in Gray’s room tonight.” Sitting on the edge of the bed, I unlace my shoes. It’s not like he did anything wrong. But he must want me for me, not because I’m the prophesied savior.
“Mari…” He takes a step toward the bed. “I didn’t mean…”
I keep my focus on my laces, which thankfully are extra knotted tonight. His heavy footfalls cross the room, and the door opens and closes. Tears well in my eyes as my fingers work the damn knots. I wanted him to stay more than anything in the world. But Avren’s rules run through my head on replay. And the ache in my heart tells me he’s acting on the magnetic attraction. What happens when it goes away?
I lay my head on the pillow and pull the blanket up to my face, covering my nose. It smells like him—that warm woodsy scent that makes my head spin so much I can’t think straight. It tempts me to cross the hall and spend the night in his arms. But my logical side wins out, and I fall asleep dreaming of the juxtaposition between dark brown hair and crystal blue eyes.
When I wakein the morning, sunlight from the window streams in, giving Bastian’s room a gentle glow. I stretch my arms and legs, enjoying my last lazy morning in the commander’s bed. Tonight, I’ll move back to my mattress on the floor. I’m also in no hurry because of how we left things last night. I can only imagine the inevitable awkwardness of our morning conversations.
Then I hear voices. More than one.
I scramble out of bed, not bothering to put on my boots, and open the door. Gray’s door is closed, but that doesn’t mean Bastian’s not awake. I listen from the top of the stairs and hear Grayson’s distinctive laugh.
My family is back.
When I reach the bottom of the stairs, the four of them sit around the table eating breakfast. Levi appears tired as he passes the basket of biscuits to Bastian, whose eyes are on me.
“Mari!” Grayson hops up from the bench to embrace me. “Bastian told us what happened with the guard and the werewolf. We’re glad you’re both ok.”
Ok. A bit of a mediocre word. Kind of like so-so. Yes, physically I’m fine, but after last night, my heart’s a bit in shambles.
“Evie and I whipped up breakfast this morning.” He ushers me to the table, seating me beside Levi. “You can imagine our surprise when we arrived in the middle of the night and found Bastian in my bed. But I understand. With your ankle, it probably wasn’t best for you to get up from a mattress on the floor. Although Ben is a miracle worker.” He carries the frypan of scrambled eggs to the table and scoops a pile onto my plate.
Levi slips his hand into mine beneath the table and squeezes. It’s his silent way of telling me he’s happy to be home and together again. I lean my head on his shoulder, thankful Bastian is on the other side of him and not across the table.
“Mari will not go back to Avren.” Bastian’s voice startles me. It holds so much command compared to last night when it held uncertainty. “I’ve disposed of the anklet so the soldiers can’t find her.”
“And what about the plan to keep our toe on the pulse of the city?” Evie speaks for the first time. The one person who still mystifies me. “If we don’t have an informer from within, we are flying blind.”
“Mari will not go back to Avren,” Bastian repeats slower, enunciating each word. “She will not work the machinery. She also needs more time to train for her role.”
“Speaking of that.” Grayson sits in his chair beside Evie. “I spoke with Wix when we were in Mafekadi. He gave me a verifiable lead into the whereabouts of the missing part of the prophecy.”
“Why should we trust Wix?” Bastian curls up his face in distaste before scooping another helping of grits onto his plate. “The fae don’t even trust him.”
Grayson leans his elbows on the table and tents his hands. “Because it makes sense. When Levi and I went to Frostacre to speak with Bracken, it was obvious he was holding back something. Wix says Cirrus has the prophecy in safe keeping.”
“But why would the king of Frostacre want to prevent the destruction of the two cities? He can only gain from it.” Bastian spreads butter on his roll.
“Because the two cities keep the focus off Frostacre. The Unseelie Court loves to conduct its business without the people of the wilderness or the other Supes bothering them. The cities shield them.” Grayson leans back in his chair, propping his arms behind his head as if he’s just released a major truth bomb.
“And if Cirrus has the prophecy tucked away, how do you propose we get it from him?” Bastian asks.
It’s a perfectly valid question. I’ve already seen the power of the Unseelie Court through Quinn. He rendered Levi unconscious, killed a fae, and kidnapped me on the back of a wolf.
“By using Mari as bait.” Grayson lifts his chin as if daring anyone to oppose him.
“No!” both Bastian and Levi say in unison.
Grayson rolls his eyes and shakes his head at Evie. “Cirrus has already sent his best courtier after her. The guy’s desperate to have control over a key piece in the prophecy beyond the piece of parchment he has stowed away. Levi and Mari will distract him while the rest of us find out where he’s hiding it.”
Bastian taps the side of his glass with his fork. It’s obvious he’s stewing. “She needs a lot more training first. The son of a bitch lured her away from Mafekadi, taking Levi out with a touch of his palm. She needs to understand their tricks.”
Levi crosses his arms, frowning. His silence is deafening.
“What do you think?” I touch his arm. He’s the expert in the fae.
He uncrosses his arms to sign. “We need to keep you safe, but I understand we must possess the other part of the prophecy for the other savior to be revealed. Uncle Bracken won’t tell me anything.” Pushing back in his chair, he places his plate on top of mine. “I need to be the one to teach her about the ways of the fae.” He glances at Bastian. “You can train her in the mornings, but I’d like the afternoons.”
“Deal.” Bastian scoops another helping of grits. “We’ll need a foolproof plan in place before stepping foot in Frostacre. Cirrus knows you exist and will expect us. As I see it, this is our first step in the long battle ahead.”
Bastian waitsfor me by the whetting stone. We’ve had no opportunity to talk about what happened last night. Just the sight of him—hair tied back, blue eyes on me, weapons crisscrossing his chest—brings back the longings. He’s right. I need to break free from the years of the Council telling me how to live my life. But it might be a slow process.
“Your quiver is over there,” he says in a flat voice, clearly not feeling the same magnetism I am at the sight of him. My heart deflates.
“Will we train with the others?” I jog to keep up with him as he starts the trek on the wooded trail. I’m not sure if either of us can take Rafe’s relentless flirting today.
He doesn’t turn around. “No, we’ll train alone.”
Instead of engaging in small talk and skirting the actual conversation we need to have, I remain silent. On the strap across his back, he has multiple daggers of different materials—iron, silver, wood, and steel. Unlike the soldiers of Avren with their fancy uniforms and polished swords, it’s clear Bastian knows how to fight. If I hadn’t seen him kill Quinn, I’d still know he was one of the best around.
“We’ll work on your bow skills first.” He removes his weapons, letting them fall to the ground with a clang. “Then we’ll practice your dagger accuracy and hand-to-hand combat skills.”
I chew on my lip, disliking his impersonal assessment of our time together. “Bastian, I…”
He removes an arrow from the quiver I set by the tree and lifts the bow. “You don’t have to explain.” His focus isn’t on me but on a grove of trees on the far side of the meadow. He lets the arrow fly, hitting his target with deadly accuracy.
“Can we at least talk about it?” I pull at an arrow in the quiver, but its head is stuck on the other shafts. I keep yanking at it, frustrated. When it finally breaks free, I plop onto my bottom, unable to control my emotions any longer. Hot tears well in my eyes as I look down at a broken arrow. A perfect metaphor for my heart.
Bastian sets down the bow and sits beside me. He clasps his hands between his knees. “Listen. I get it. Well, maybe I don’t totally get it, but I’m trying to understand what you’ve been through. Gray explained it to me. It took him two full years before he’d touch a woman. Upbringing runs deep. It’s amazing you’ve kissed a man who’s not your husband.” He sighs, digging a heel into the dirt. “I’m a patient person. You’re worth waiting for. And I’ll wait as long as it takes. Besides, I enjoy just being around you.”
I watch my hand shake as I bridge the short expanse between us and rest it on his knee. “You don’t understand how much I want to.”
The corner of his lip lifts. “Oh, I think I do.” He leans in close, cupping my cheek and bringing his lips to mine. Their gentleness melts me, turning my insides to molten lava. And almost as quickly as his lips touch mine, he pulls away. “We better get to taking down some of these killer trees.”