Chapter Twenty-Five #3
I set my phone on my kitchen island and turned around.
The main living area in my new apartment was open concept, kitchen spilling into dining and living room.
A slider was set in the far wall with a small balcony looking out onto a much nicer pool than the one at my old place.
I started pacing as I mulled everything over.
All this time I’d been so focused on my own shit, on working through everything that had happened and how I felt about it.
I’d interpreted Jakob’s taunting in the bar as playfulness.
That, like me, he was weirdly enjoying this little separation.
He said he liked riling me up; it was a fair assumption to make.
But what if I’d misread the situation like I’d misread everything else?
What if instead of teasing me to get a rise out of me, he was being mean?
I’d forgiven him, I wanted him, all his baggage included, but had he forgiven me? Did he still want me?
I kept pacing. My leg barely protested. I had physical therapy a few days ago, and the new set of exercises my therapist recommended were working out pretty well.
Plus I’d been taking it easier. After all my revelations over the past week, I couldn’t keep lying to myself.
I wasn’t one hundred percent, and I probably never would be again.
Pushing myself too hard proved nothing and only hurt me in the end.
It was time to stop acting like I didn’t have chronic pain.
I’d started sitting on a padded stool in between customers at the bar, and miraculously, no one gave me shit for it.
Before getting into bed each night, I worked through a long series of stretches and then massaged the stiffness from my joints and muscles.
I repeated the routine every morning, iced my knee more to prevent swelling, and was quick to pop an aspirin if I felt I needed a bit more help.
Barely a week had passed, but I already noticed a difference, and I wanted to kick myself for being so stupid about my leg for so long.
A knock sounded from my door.
My feet were already moving in its direction before my brain fully processed the noise.
Was it Jakob? I stopped midstride. Or Redding?
I’d spent the past several days paranoid in the extreme, checking over my shoulder any time I felt exposed, having a coworker follow me home every night and stand in my doorway, ready to call 911 while I searched my apartment for signs of forced entry or an intruder.
I had weapons stashed all over the apartment, and with Redding in mind, I turned and grabbed a gun from the kitchen before moving to the door.
I glanced through the peephole and let out a breath when I saw Jakob standing on the other side.
God, he looked good, looming there in the brightly lit stairway like a little slice of night.
I threw open my door, and he strode inside without being asked.
He shut it behind him, turning, and we faced each other in silence.
His eyes roamed over me, taking in every tiny detail.
My focus stayed fixed on his face, searching out any clues about how he was and how he felt about me.
He arched a brow down at my hand. Whoops.
I was still holding my gun. I set it on the kitchen counter and turned back to him.
“Where have you been?” I asked.
“Getting everything ready for our long weekend,” he said.
It was good to hear his voice again. A flash of relief shot through me at his words, but I couldn’t let it distract me. “Is that why you hung up on me and couldn’t be bothered to send so much as a text the past few days? I’ve been freaking out, Jakob.”
His smile was sharp. “How’s it feel?”
I sucked in a breath. Shit. This was payback for turning my phone off when I went to meet Nick? Maybe he hadn’t forgiven me after all.
He caught sight of my face and relented. “I’m sorry if I freaked you out.”
“What were you really doing?” I asked.
His expression hardened, and this time I recognized the warning look in his eyes. “Setting up our trip,” he repeated slowly.
Huh. For some reason he didn’t think he could be honest with me right now.
Why? Did he think that someone was watching me?
Liam or Daniel or maybe even… Nick. If it was Liam or Daniel, Jakob wouldn’t worry about how they’d react if he said, “What I was really doing was violently murdering a sociopathic piece of shit,” so he must have thought that Nick might be watching.
Jesus Christ.
Just when I thought I’d finally get a break, shit went sideways again.
Was Redding a setup? Had Nick let Redding go to see what I would do?
To see what Jakob would do? If we killed him and Nick found out, he would either throw us in jail or, the more likely option, blackmail us into working for him to take the Kings or the Specters down.
This was what you wanted, I reminded myself.
I took a deep breath. Yes, it was. And I realized now how fucked up that probably made me, but screw it. I’d decided I was in, so I was in. I’d have to trust Jakob to tell me the truth when he felt like he could.
“Okay,” I said.
He gave me a pointed look. “Okay?”
I nodded.
He glanced past me for the first time, taking in my apartment. “I like your new place.”
I looked over my shoulder, following his gaze.
It was still a little sparse; the only piece of furniture in the living room was a couch.
I hadn’t gotten around to replacing my TV, and there were no little side tables or area rugs or throw blankets to make the space feel safe and cozy yet, but it would get there.
I was determined this time to make a real home for myself.
“Thanks,” I said, turning back to him.
He nodded. “Was Dad’s check enough to cover everything?”
“And then some,” I said. “So, when are we going on our trip?”
“Right now.”
I frowned. “I can’t. I have to work all weekend.”
He shook his head. “I had Lisa switch out your shifts.”
Well, that settled that.
Excitement bloomed in my chest, and I tried to tamp it down before it got away from me, and I ended up doing something stupid like giggling. “Does that mean you’ve forgiven me?”
He stepped forward, finally closing the distance between us. His eyes were steady on mine as he stared down at me. “You did what you felt you had to do. I might not like it, I might not agree with it, but it worked. It solved most of our problems. Even my father has been acting less fucked up.”
Holy shit, maybe I’d actually gotten through to Liam.
“Plus,” he said, hand dropping to cup my cheek, “after everything I put you through leading up to that point, I’d be a hypocrite not to forgive you.”
I leaned into his touch. “Yes, you would.”
“I don’t want to turn into my father,” he said.
I gripped his wrist and stared up at him. “You won’t.”
A small crease formed between his brows. He was on the verge of scowling. “I’m not perfect. I’m not even a good person, but I’m going to try not to treat you like that again.”
I angled my face up, gaze dropping to his mouth. “No more bullshit.”
“No more bullshit,” he agreed, sealing his lips over mine.
I swayed into him. He still cupped my cheek, using it to tilt my head back even farther as his tongue delved into my mouth. His other hand snaked around my back, bicep flexing against my side as he pulled me closer.
In that moment, I knew I’d made the right decision. I’d never felt like this about anyone else. He drove me crazy in the worst and the best way, and now I couldn’t imagine myself settling for anything less.
He gave me one last lingering caress and then pulled away just enough to speak. “Are you in, Evans?”
“I’m in,” I told him.
His arm fell from my waist as he stepped back. “Then pack a bag and let’s get the fuck out of here.”
I wanted to, God I wanted to, but I couldn’t leave town without knowing if there was a risk that Redding might get to Dr. Perez or Gran.
I couldn’t ask him outright, not if Nick might overhear somehow—if he’d bugged this apartment, so help me God, I would find a way to make him regret it—so I spoke to Jakob like I had after finding out Liam bugged the van.
“Is it okay to leave town right now?”
Jakob nodded, leveling his gaze at me. “Yes.”
From the conviction in his tone, I believed him.
“Okay, I’ll pack,” I said. “Where are we going?”
He grinned. “Somewhere that no one will hear you screaming for the next three days.”
I blinked. “Is that supposed to be sexy or scary?”
His grin turned deranged. “Yes.”
I laughed. It must have been the reaction he wanted because his smile went back to normal. Better than normal actually. He smiled at me wider than he ever had before. So wide that two little dimples appeared on either side of his lips.
I turned away from him and went to pack.
It was either that or tackle him, and if I got my hands on him now, we’d spend the whole weekend humping each other in my empty apartment.
That wouldn’t work. I hadn’t forgotten his promise to let me tie him down, and there wasn’t anything strong enough to hold him in here.
I called Gran while I packed, telling her that I’d be gone for a few days.
“With Jakob?” she asked, and I could hear her smiling.
“Yes,” I said, shoveling clothes into my duffel bag.
“Don’t do anything I wouldn’t do,” she said in a singsong voice.
I snorted. “You’ve told me enough traumatizing stories that I know damn well how little you wouldn’t do.”
Gran cackled. “Then have fun.”
“I will. I’ll call you when we get there.”
“Okay. Love you, kiddo.”
“Love you too,” I said.