Chapter 26
“Pardon me, me Lady, but yer parents have arrived.”
The maid didn’t mean anything negative by the words. Of that, Emily was absolutely certain. Yet, she couldn’t help but feel a touch of apprehension at the whole thing.
It wasn’t that she was opposed to seeing her parents again. She had been the one to invite them here, after all. But she felt strangely about it.
She wanted nothing more than to have her mother in here with her, helping Kaden’s sisters fuss over her hair and adding the final touches to her dress.
That was all she wanted, and yet she also felt like it was something impossible because she was still slightly upset with her for her inability to reason with her father.
Her father was another issue entirely, as she didn’t have any desire to see him at all.
She didn’t wish to hear any word from his lips, for he would no doubt insult her about how long it had taken her to find a man who would actually put up with her and make it down the aisle, and how Kaden didn’t know what he was in for yet.
She absolutely did not want to hear that.
Her father used to be the man she looked up to more than anyone else, and now she didn’t want to see him. Perhaps someday she would forgive him for how he had handled all of this, but she wasn’t sure. She was still going to get married, even though she didn’t wish to.
Perhaps she would have found her way to Kaden regardless of her father’s meddling. It wasn’t like the two of them didn’t get along. She wasn’t over the peace she had felt while wrapped up in his arms.
But she had still woken up alone.
If he thought he had successfully avoided having to explain that little move just because today was their wedding day, he had another thing coming.
“Shall I go and fetch yer maither for ye?” Skye asked kindly, placing the flowers in her hand on the edge of the bed.
It would have been easier to focus on Maggie and the way she weaved between the legs of every person she walked close to.
“Nay, that’s alright,” Emily answered.
The sisters exchanged a look.
But it was Ailis who came to sit in front of her. “Is something the matter? Ye can ask, we willnae judge ye for it. That’s only for the Lord to do.”
Emily smiled weakly. “Nay, I am well. I just…” She heaved a sigh. “Ye have done so much for me already. I fear that I daenae deserve all of this effort that ye are putting in.”
“Oh, nonsense.” Ailis waved a dismissive hand. “That’s nae something that ye need to worry yerself about. We are happy to do it. I can safely speak for both me daughters and meself when I say that there isnae nearly enough that we can do for Kaden. Nothing will make up for lost time.”
Freya stepped forward. “He has told ye that he doesnae blame ye for any of that.”
Ailis rolled back her shoulders. “Aye, but a maither will always hold herself responsible.” She reached out and patted Emily’s knee.
“Ye will understand when ye have children. Bairns are a whole new reason for living. And when ye do, whatever troubles ye have with yer parents will be sorted as well. Time has a way of making all things seem small.”
“I hope that is true,” Emily answered, hoping she sounded more confident than she actually felt.
Ailis nodded once more. “Well, I can tell ye that I daenae remember a single fight that I had with me husband, now that all of these years have passed. While I can still remember that he was a stubborn ox, I cannae remember anything but how much I miss him and the way his eyes tended to crinkle around the corners when he smiled.”
“It must be hard, being here without him,” Emily murmured.
“Some days are harder than others.” Ailis nodded.
“I will never say that it was easy, because it wasnae—still isnae. But it is better knowing what happened to him, I suppose. Our marriage was arranged by our parents. I understand that it comes with a lot of questions and uncertainty, but I do think that it will work out. I’ve watched the way ye interact with one another, after all. ”
Emily didn’t know what to say. Of course, a mother watched her son, but she wanted to know what Ailis thought of them.
Perhaps it didn’t have much weight, given that Kaden was reluctant to let anybody in, much less his family.
“Are ye nervous? I daenae think ye have anything to be nervous about. I ken what people say about me son, but he has a good heart.”
That was something Emily had no problem admitting to.
She managed another weak smile. “I have seen that to be true. I’m nae afraid.”
It was like a weight was lifted off Ailis’s shoulders at her words. “Oh, good, because I ken what they say about him… and I just cannae believe a word of it.”
Sadness suddenly bloomed in Ailis’s eyes, and she dropped her gaze to the floor.
“I beg yer pardon, did I say something to bother ye?” Emily asked, reaching over to touch the older woman’s knee in apology.
Ailis was quick to wipe her tears and shake her head. “Nay, it is nothing like that. I was just having a moment, is all. Ye see, at me old age, every now and then I confess to getting lost in memories.”
Emily’s eyebrows knitted together in confusion.
“Me marriage was arranged. But soon me husband and I came to love each other. I do hope that ye and me son find love with one another. It does seem that ye are rather suited for it.” Ailis smiled weakly.
“Like ye, I was once betrothed to another. I sometimes wonder just how different me life might have been had I gone through with that betrothal.”
“Ye were?” Emily asked.
She knew that it was very taboo to break off engagements, and to see such a successful woman sitting before her and never having even heard a whisper about it? It seemed impossible.
“Aye, but he wasnae a good man. Nae at all. He was from a neighboring clan, a very powerful one at that. One that still exists. And he has only grown more cruel with age, from what I have heard. Our dear Kaden wouldnae be here if I had married that brute, that is for certain.”
Emily nodded once. “Me first betrothal was much the same. A man twice me age and four times as depraved.” She shuddered involuntarily.
Ailis opened her mouth, as if there was something else she wanted to say on the matter, only to shut it once again as Skye hurried over to them with the off-white gown that Emily was to be married in.
Ailis helped Emily to stand.
“What do ye think?” Skye asked.
“It’s… unlike anything I’ve ever seen before,” Emily gushed as she brushed her fingers along the fabric and the intricate lacework.
She wasn’t even exaggerating. She had seen paintings of her mother when she had married her father, and hers had been a stunning pale green gown passed down from her own mother. It hadn’t even occurred to Emily to ask her for it when she had been brought here.
She rose from her seat as Skye was nearly vibrating with excitement. She lifted her arms up and over her head so that the dress could fall around her torso.
The dress fit her perfectly, so all of those final measurements and last-minute fittings had truly paid off. A collective gasp rang out as they pulled the bodice into place.
Emily glanced at herself in the mirror, turning this way and that. She felt beautiful; there was no denying that. This was the moment she had been dreading for so long?
With the two engagements before Kaden, even thinking about this moment or choosing a wedding dress had made her nauseous. Now, when she thought about joining Kaden, that sense of dread wasn’t there.
Maybe she was ready for this, after all.
Emily turned to leave the room to head to the Great Hall, but her father stepped in her way.
She hadn’t invited either of her parents to help her get ready or speak to her before she left because she didn’t wish to hear anything that they might have to say.
She wasn’t here for them. She was here because her father had turned his back on her; there was no other way of putting it.
“So ye are actually going through with it?” Hamish asked from the doorway.
All the excitement she had been feeling promptly evaporated.
“This is supposed to be a happy day for me, and I fear that any direction this conversation goes willnae be pleasant. Now, if ye would kindly step aside, I have somewhere to be.”
“Aye, well, I had to come, did I nae?” he asked, sounding like he had already indulged in drink. “Had to see ye actually make it down the aisle.”
Emily’s eyes narrowed. “And if I were to leave right now?”
“Oh, I’m planning on walking ye right there meself. Never mind that I have me men guarding every entrance to this castle.”
Emily’s blood threatened to boil. “And Laird Muir was fine with that?”
Her father shrugged one shoulder, as if he hadn’t even bothered to talk it over with Kaden in the first place. “Ye are free to try to leave, I suppose, but I willnae let ye ruin this for our clan.”
“So, ye wish to treat me like a prisoner. Is that it?” Emily crossed her arms over her chest.
Was this truly the man she had looked up to for so many years? Where had that version of him gone?
She would not allow herself to cry on her wedding day. She refused to.
“Believe me when I say that I am nae doing any of this for ye. After today, I daenae ken if I even wish to see ye again. Ye are always talking about how much of a disappointment I am to ye, but ye never once stop to consider that I, too, am disappointed by ye, Faither. Now, step aside. Please,” she said softly, working very hard to keep her voice even.
Her father scoffed, as if he wasn’t taking her seriously. She supposed that she shouldn’t be surprised by his reaction.
“There is truly nay other reason that ye came to speak with me?” she asked as she brushed past him.
She paused only for a moment to give him a chance to apologize, to admit that he was wrong, or that he still saw her for more than just her political worth.
Silence followed her all the way down the hall.