CHAPTER 11
What possessed Ishtar to mention they’d have to share a bed? She could have told him he’d have to bunk on the floor or lied and claimed she’d be sleeping elsewhere.
Blame the fact he wouldn’t stop making comments that reminded her she was a woman, and a desirable one at that.
Reece made her feel alive, a sensation that she’d long lost and pretty much forgotten.
Being with him she didn’t feel alone. He even had her yearning for his touch.
For the first time in forever, she felt desire and liked it.
They entered the citadel and waited as the room pressurized and cleared the air. A press of the red button on her wrist—tapped three times in quick succession—released the seals on her suit. A watching Reece mimicked her actions.
The helmet came off and a sweaty-faced Reece grimaced as he apologized. “Sorry for stinking up the suit. The snake incident stressed me a little.”
“A little?” She snorted. “I’m not ashamed to admit they completely freaked me out. Glad they didn’t drown or eat us. In better news, we can bathe. While the wells weren’t enough to supply a citadel full of citizens, plus grow crops, we should have more than plenty to shower with.”
She showed him to a bathing chamber and how to use the faucets and their version of a toilet. Not quite Demolition Man with the shells, but confusing to a newbie. It took a moment before anything sputtered from the long unused tap.
“Sweet. It’s warm,” he exclaimed, running his hand under the spray. He grabbed the hem of his shirt and began lifting.
While tempted to stay and watch—maybe even join, a naughty thought that came out of nowhere—she instead left him and went into an adjoining room—her old room, not that you could tell it once belonged to a queen.
The grandeur had long been stripped and only a mattress with bedding remained planted directly on the floor.
The first wave of refugees had taken as much as they could, and then when Atlantis had been completed, the settlers stripped almost everything else, their way of holding on to their past. If Mars ever did revive, they’d have to spend a lot of her stashed wealth to purchase what they needed just to live.
A blow to her finances she’d gladly welcome.
The shower, while lukewarm—the deep chill from below ground hard to counter with weakened heating systems—eased some of her tension. The plunge into the lake and the snakes had been terrifying, but now she had a new worry.
What would Reece do if they shared the bed? Would he try and seduce? Would she let him? What if he did nothing? Should she make the first move and have a selfishly indulgent moment?
She emerged from the bathing chamber to find Reece already lounging on the mattress, one arm tucked behind his head, his other hand holding a tablet upright on his belly.
He wore a warm and comfortable-looking track suit, definitely not sexy attire.
A spurt of disappointment hit her at seeing his body all covered up.
Maybe his flirtatious words were just meant for fun and shouldn’t be taken seriously.
“What are you studying?” she asked, shoving her soiled clothes into a niche in the wall. Would the laundry unit still function? She’d not tried it in centuries.
“Looking over the readings I took before our swim.”
“And?”
“And it’s too early for me to form a conclusion.”
She snorted. “Is that a polite way of saying you don’t know how you’re going to fix the problem?”
“Not yet. Give me time and I’ll think of something.”
Doubtful, but she also really hoped he could.
While the large bed had more than enough space for her to lie down without touching him, something about the intimacy of it had her hesitating.
“What’s up, Queenie? You’re chewing your lip and wringing your hands something fierce.”
Not about to admit her trepidation, she threw herself down on her side, back to him. “Nothing. Being here is just hard.” An answer he accepted.
“What will you do if Mars can make a comeback?”
The question took her aback. “I actually hadn’t thought of it.”
“You should because, once I fix it, you’ll need to make some decisions. Will you stay queen? Finally retire?”
“You’re asking me to imagine something that won’t happen.”
“Such little faith.”
“More like being a realist. I don’t know why you think you can solve a problem thousands of years old. Or are you implying I didn’t try hard enough?”
“Oh, I believe you’ve tried, well past the point most people would have given up. Don’t forget, I have prophecy on my side.”
“Would you really give your life to fulfill it because, it seems to me, it claims your success hinges on your death.”
“A warrior is always aware he might have to give his life to fulfill his mission,” his somber reply.
“As it is, I’ve lived much longer than I should have.
The day I became Aquarius I should have died.
I’d be nothing but bones in the Earth if not for my second chance.
So, no, I wouldn’t be greedy. And you’re one to talk.
You gave up your life and any chance at happiness to do the right thing. ”
She almost denied his claim, but he spoke the truth. She wasn’t happy, hadn’t been since she’d realized her victory over the Kukakk spelled the Martian downfall.
Rather than continue this conversation, she fell silent and pretended to sleep.
Soon, she actually did slumber, her dreams, no surprise, haunted by the past. This time she stood in her bedroom, not as it sat currently but when it used to be a lavish sanctuary of soft fabrics, plush carpets, and the window gleamed with daylight.
Through it, she could gaze upon her kingdom.
The clean and safe streets. The sturdy and highly functional homes and buildings. The peace she’d taken for granted.
She stiffened, feeling a presence by her side. “Invading my dream again?”
“Not on purpose,” Reece murmured. “Gorgeous city. I can see why you miss the old Mars. It used to be quite amazing.”
“I’m aware.” A terse reply. She went to move away from the window, but he grabbed her arm.
“That wasn’t meant to sound as if I blamed you. You did the best you could.”
“And it wasn’t enough.” Her voice broke.
He dragged her against his chest and wrapped his arms around her in a hug. She couldn’t remember the last time anyone had gotten that close.
She should push away. She didn’t deserve his comfort, but instead, she leaned her cheek against him, heard the steady thump of his heart, and somehow felt the warmth of him despite it being a dream. Desire stirred but forget pushing away. Reece held her tight—and it felt so good. So right.
So undeserved…
She tilted her head back to catch his attention and demand he let her loose, only for his lips to descend.
He captured hers for a kiss, stealing her breath, igniting her senses, flooding her with pleasure.
Every part of her suddenly sprang to life, reminding her of what she’d deprived herself for eons.
Should she allow herself to enjoy this moment? Had she not punished herself enough?
She parted her lips, and he deepened the embrace, tasting and teasing, his tongue a decadent delight. The taste of him ambrosia to someone so long parched for affection.
His grip loosened, but she didn’t push away. Rather her arms looped around his neck, keeping her close, reveling in the feel of him against her. His hands slid from her back, stroking down her spine until he could cup her buttocks, pulling her that she might feel his erect interest.
It added fuel to her already smoldering passion. He kept one hand on her ass, but the other teased under the hem of her shirt, and at the touch of his calloused fingers on her flesh, she sucked in a breath, leading him to murmur, “Should I stop?”
A part of her screamed she shouldn’t enjoy herself while so many still slumbered, while her world remained ruined. She told the self-flagellating martyr to shut the fuck up. She needed this, like a flower needed sun. Let her have a reason to want to keep forging on.
She kissed him for a reply, gripping him tight, almost frantic with the slide of her lips on his.
With that permission, her shirt ended up being stripped and tossed aside, letting his hands roam her upper body without impediment. Every nerve ending awakening and tingling. All of her roused in anticipation—and need.
She tugged at his shirt, wanting the sensation of his flesh against hers. He practically tore it in his impatience, growling, “Stripping should be easier in a dream.”
She almost laughed, might have except he pressed his chest to hers, the friction of it against her breasts making her knees weak, forcing her to cling to his broad shoulders lest she fall to the floor in a boneless heap.
When he leaned her back, breaking the kiss that he might use his mouth on her breasts, she gasped and grabbed at his hair. The tug of his lips on her nipples, a jolt felt between her legs.
He lavished her breasts with attention, leaving her panting and moaning.
He lay her on the bed, but rather than join her right away, he removed her pants, leaving her bared to him.
The admiration in his gaze had her sex clenching.
As for her, she drank in his muscled chest, the way his waist narrowed into a vee that disappeared below his waistband, the bulge at his groin.
He joined her on the bed, his lips capturing hers as he slid a hand between her thighs, his fingers parting her slick folds, teasing her.
He teased his finger back and forth, the friction a rhythm her hips matched. He abandoned her lips, but only so he could kneel between her legs.
She couldn’t help but glance at him, her lids heavy with desire. His expression stole her breath. Intent. Ardent.
He spread her thighs wide enough to settle between and even placed one over his shoulder, exposing her fully to him. He licked his lips as if he hungered. He then feasted, face buried against her sex, his lips tugging her nether lips, his tongue teasing her wetly.
He lapped, quick flicks of his tongue against her clitoris that immediately had her trembling. When he grazed his teeth over her clit, she arched upward, crying out in pleasure.
He folded an arm over her lower belly to anchor her in place and continued his oral tease, stroking with his tongue, sucking at her sensitive button.
She could only thrash and moan as the pressure built. Tremble and tighten as her body neared its peak.
When he thrust a finger into her then a second, pumping her needy channel, she couldn’t help but cry out and clench and come.
Her orgasm rippled through her, a taut band snapping and relieving her of a tension she’d not noticed until it was gone. As he softened his licking, aftershocks went through her, along with a boneless sensation. She floated. Her body more relaxed than she could ever recall.
As he shifted to come lie beside her, she expected him to take his pleasure, would have welcomed the feel of him inside her. To her surprise, he rolled her to her side and dragged her into his body, spooning her from behind. Holding her. Murmuring, “Thank you for that gift.”
Cradled in his embrace, he didn’t see the silent tears that rolled, not from regret.
Never regret. They came from the realization she’d intentionally punished herself all those centuries, and for what?
Only she recalled the trauma. Only she blamed herself.
No one would have known or cared if she’d given up on Mars.
Those who slept had gone into stasis knowing they might never wake.
The ones who evacuated to Earth had long since forgotten their roots.
And yet, she’d chosen to punish herself. To force herself to live apart. To never allow anyone close. To never take pleasure in anything.
Time for her move on, especially since she now saw a chance to finally atone for her mistakes, not by reviving a world that couldn’t be saved. Mars, the way she’d known it, would never come back. But maybe there was still a chance for Earth.
As an idea began to percolate, still inside her dream, she fell asleep in Reece’s arms and woke in the same position in her bed on Mars. Spooned against Reece. A man with too much honor, who deserved to live. And it was up to her to make sure he didn’t sacrifice his life for an impossible dream.