Chapter 23
Twenty-three
Jada
Footage of my home, of people I know, loops in an endless stream on the screen in front of me as hushed whispers erupt around me.
My cheeks warm, no doubt as pink as my hair, as a strange feeling floods my system.
Shame. I’m embarrassed for Astralis to see how we live, when it shouldn’t matter at all.
Why do I feel like this? Is it because a small part of me understands how much better this place is than Lunara?
Will the citizens of Astralis think differently—less of me—or my friends?
For fuck’s sake, Zellie. I stare at her face on the screen, set in grim determination and full of willpower.
She’s flying off the handle. Fuck, fuckity, fuck.
“Do they actually need to be granted permission to access different areas of their home?”
“Doesn’t look homey at all.”
“Did you see the food?”
“That lab area freaks me out.”
“Why does it seem so… sterile?”
Accusation, judgment, empathy, disgust—a swell of emotions stifles me in the room.
It’s too much—I can’t fucking take it. I push back through the crowd—less politely this time—and beeline for the door as fast as I can.
The hallway is equally disrupted. Chaos.
Layered voices asking, “Did you see?” The gossip is spreading faster than I can take in breath.
Pure chaos. Is this what she wanted? I don’t do well in environments of disarray.
I thrive on balance—structure, routine, calmness.
I bite my lip, wondering what my best option is in this scenario.
Damage control with the Kosmos or lying low and letting the storm pass?
A dark power rumbles throughout the Hall, shaking the walls surrounding me.
I’m going to assume that the Kosmos have discovered Zellie’s live entertainment.
Maybe getting out of here is the smart move.
Keeping my head down, ears warm, I pass through the doorways until I’ve reached the foyer leading to the city.
“Miss Bellamy?”
My eyes shut as I prepare myself for the wrath of an angry Pluto. I was so close. I spin, clasping my hands together. “Yes?” Submissive, innocent, helpful.
He’s leaning against a column near the doors to the throne room, spinning a crystal in one hand, his cloak lightly swaying with each movement. His calculating stare pierces me with unhinged rage.
“Do you share your friend’s sentiments? I know you two were rather close.”
“No, of course not. I’m grateful for the opportunity to be here, sir.”
He blinks, and every ounce of anger vanishes from his face. “Of course, it’s not fair of me to assume.”
“If that’s all… am I free to go?”
“Stars, Jada, yes! I hope I didn’t frighten you. This has been rather stressful.” He chuckles, but the sound falls flat.
“I can only imagine.” I really can.
“You were exceptional today. I think we could add some responsibilities to your plate, don’t you?”
“I’m happy to learn as much as I can.” As long as I’m not stuck plucking dewdrops out of flowers ever again.
“So eager—you’re going to do very well here. I’ll talk with the other members, and we can discuss more at the next meeting in two day’s time. I’ll see you then, Miss Bellamy.”
This doesn’t seem like the opportune time to say “have a nice day”, so I opt for a nod before pushing out into the lively city.
It’s not until I’m gone that I realize I never disclosed my friendship with Zellie, or how close we were, to him.
My day has been soured by Zellie’s dramatic upstaging.
I’m truly appalled at how angry and bold she’s become.
Certainly, the Kosmos isn’t responsible for what she encountered in the trials.
Pluto explained how the tradition must be upheld, how the moonstone needed to be collected by worthy competitors.
She’s been honored within this city—why is she so intent on destroying it?
I slowly make my way to the portal, not wanting to return home to the drabness of Lunara, but feeling uncomfortable lingering in Astralis after what’s transpired.
Is this how Zellie felt? Like she was without a home?
It hollows out something within my chest, making me crave connection and comfort.
Anything to ease this nervous energy and loneliness.
No one knows me here, yet I’ve outgrown there.
This looming in between is where the growth happens, right?
This skin no longer fits, these feelings don’t serve me anymore.
Who am I? But more importantly, who do I want to be?
I’m torn from my thoughts as I see Zellie’s iridescent hair, almost glowing, as she backs out of the bakery I visited, laughing. Does she seriously think this is funny?
Fueled by anger, I yell out to her. It’s time for us to find some common ground.